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If
If a sea could made of tears
Mine would overflow
If something could burn
You from the inside out
I would be ash
If you could drown in shame
My lungs would be full of water
If it was a crime to love someone
That made you hate yourself
I would be charged 20 years to life
jersey Feb 2020
Have you ever almost drowned?

When I was a 4” 6 year old, I tried to go in the 5” side of the pool. Mind you, I couldn't swim. I held on to the side of the pool until I decided it'd be best to push myself away from the edge.
I immediately began drowning.
It was terrifying at first. I quickly started flailing my arms, trying to get myself back to the edge. Why did it seem so far away all of a sudden?
My lungs gasped for air but were met with water, not exactly the next best thing. Let me tell you, breathing in water hurts like a b*tch.
At some point, it stopped hurting though. I don't know if I was close to unconsciousness or if I just accepted my fate for a couple of seconds but after that burning feeling, I felt a moment of bliss.
That was until I touched the bottom of the pool with my feet and my survival instincts kicked in as I pushed myself up to the surface and back to the edge.

I never forgot that feeling of breathing in water.

In class yesterday, I went to answer a question but I couldn't.
My best friend and I got in a fight and I couldn't find it in me to defend myself.
My dog whines and begs for me to do something with him. Anything but sit there.
These moments seem random but they all have one thing in common.
Every single moment was a time when I felt that feeling of breathing water when there was no water in sight. Each time, worse than the last. Each time, the floor is farther and farther away.

Have you ever almost drowned?
It happens to me every single day.
Kat Pan Feb 2020
With you I feel what I feel with few
Like the sky is yellow and the sun is blue

Shut my eyes and forgot what I knew
As the sky turned black and the sun changed hues

The oceans rose and swallowed my view

Submerged in the fear of loving you

Scared to drown in fear
Scared to fear a fear
Fearing you
Fearing I
Fearing it
Fearing love
Scared to love again
Poetic T Feb 2020
You were the drought
  and I was the rain that
was going to drown you out.

But you swam like you depended
                on the earth to hold you.

Never letting you hold ground
              cos I took it from under you.

No discipline to hold you like gravity,
        the only thing you'll be doing is sinking..
  

Bottom of the bay, where all wasted things
                sink too, you may take a while.

But believe me you'll end up where the rest
               sank.

Shrink wrapped with
        stones of regret on ya
             ankles of missteps.

When you dried out I was the oasis
                   of plentiful rhyme.

you tried to steal from my fountain
   but i held you under till you drowned.

And as long as no one knows where you
  were ship wrecked, you'll be a drought
in a sea of plentiful moisture
                                    that i drink upon.
tryhard Jan 2020
my regrets are as vast as the ocean
as far as the eyes can see
as deep as the undiscovered dark
i have been drowning in them lately
and it has rained as i tried to swim ashore
i cannot find safe harbor
no island in sight
they told me the lighthouse was working
but here underwater
all i see is darkness
lately i've been wondering
why i wrecked my own ship
i guess i will have to die here
in a sea of monsters and storms
in an ocean of my own misery
Dani Jan 2020
Slipping inside...

I let the water wash over me

Scalding and steaming

I feel myself melt in the heat

Sliding down into the water

Crawling over my head

The world around me drowns

I do not hear the door creak open and shut

I do not hear the distant cough

It rings through the halls like a bell

Tolling death

Sink further in

Into the dark warm waters

So that my tears mix inside

Spoiling the fresh water with the bitter salt of sadness

Even under here

I can hear the ringing

This is how I disappear

Death's warm embrace comes for me

Deep in the water
Kewayne Wadley Jan 2020
I dream of love
As two fish in a pond;
I drown only when I am away from you.
I exist only when I am inside
of you
violet Jan 2020
at this point, i don't know what to do
i just feel like i'm constantly floating
on the verge of drowning
a constant state of melancholy

i tell myself it'll get better as time passes
but is it really true?
or am i just feeding myself lies
just so that i can maybe make it through

day after day
i feel my soul being eaten away
by this monster i've been trying to find
but alas its been me all along

if only i could **** the monster that's been hurting me
but that would meen killling myself too
and maybe thats not so bad after all.
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