your eyes seem to change colors
and seem to be deeper than the ocean

you have different laughs but my
favorite is the short and breathless one

you know i can’t stand country music
yet you blast it through your speakers

your family has dinner together every
single night like the ones in the movies

you always say, “yeah, um” or “the uh”
when you’re thinking of what to say

you workout every day for hours
shaping your body into perfection

you seem like a mama’s boy
always trying to please and talk to her

you love animals but
still eat your meat

your mom is always gone traveling
and you pretend that you’re not sad

you work hard for the grades you have
but the pressure makes you feel worse

your considering the army but
can’t decide if it’s worth the time

your hands are always rough when
you touch me but it just means hard work

you always look at me like i’m the
only one you are able to see

every time we see each other
i notice more stops on your
roadmap and i travel every
time we laugh, cry, smile
and i think it’ll be an endless vacation

Alone in the dark...
Hearing the dogs bark...
Searching for my fone...
Just remembered now you own...
Looked up the sky, no moon was in sight...
Aaah! its gona be a long night...
Light was gone, power was out...
Wondering when someones gonna come about...
Its almost midnight, and all is silent outside...
Creepy flashbacks seem to droop from inside...
Trying to focus on yesterday's drama...
Of what really put me through such a trauma...
Gathering the moments, I realized we broke...
Yes, we did! you blundered with your filthy joke...
Assuming it sounded cool within your friend group...
But what a **** you are now unrespected dupe...

©sim

How can you stop
yourself from falling
when there's nothing
holding you back?

If you and I
are two pieces
of a same heart,
how am I supposed to hate you?

she's like sleeping beauty
and by that I mean
she's beautiful
and she'd rather be sleeping right now

Falls asleep instantly
eyes closed tight in between lines in our argument

let me give you a better example
and we shift the scene to a bedroom plagued by doubt
but despite that the sheets are soft comfort, liquid warm radiance
To the end of a conversation at the beginning of a night

Me: Did you know that?
Her: Yup.
Me: Well did you know you're beautiful?
Her: LOUD SNORING NOISES

But where am I going with this?

I don't know

I'm going to better days
to reminders
kissprint frozen on the window of my car

To the cutest little kick I have ever seen as an excited girl enters buffalo wild wings after working 12 hours

excited because I'm there

That's where I'm going.
Back in time to "she likes my hands despite the warts"

I don't know

back to my hands
let them be a hammock
so I can hold her
rocking
because she'd rather be sleeping

Because sleep escapes the day
escapes the people
and the way
I say
the thoughts that echo in her mind
she's horrible
guilty
fire
tired
knife wounds
twisting
resisting
the urge to ram my self righteousness down her throat

I gave her my coat
and she asked if I smoked
(because that's a deal breaker)
I told her no

and the next time she slipped her hand in my arm
and the next time she slipped her thoughts in my mind
slipped her hands through my hair
her tongue in my mouth
her lightning in my eyes

surprise
I don't know
I don't know
My hands are distilled comfort
drink them up
this might be a beer you actually like

I don't know

I don't know

If we work
If we can

go back to strained conversations in which I am dying and she is existing in the same place with another person because that's what she's all about

A kiss
Another
kisses close our mouths to the arguments

and a single text
drips back into my thoughts

"Please don't leave me."

And I wonder if I am speaking to her
or the depression
if she lets it be her face for a while
while her mind rests in the background of her life

Because she'd rather be sleeping.

beautiful eyes, beautiful smile
beautiful heart, beautiful mind
beautiful name, beautiful self

those things i need them the most
those things i need to own them
for myself
and only for me

i’ve never said i love you
i’ve always been saying that i hate you
all because i don’t understand
my heart, my feelings

i pray to god every night
banging on his door
begging him on my knees
“i want to be his friend”

i’ve never heard from him
yet you come to build me up
and then tear me up
just as fast as escape velocity

i kept calm
because i somehow know
that we’ll be fine
i’ll be fine

but then i heard from him
he said with his punch against my stomach
his tight grip around my neck, choking the air out of me

“no, young lady.
you shall suffer more.
i will give you someone
someone you’ve never expected
to step on your bleeding injury.”

GIFT OF GOD,
do you know what i’ve been through?
do you know how it feels to be left behind without knowing the why?
do you know how it feels to see you pretending not to know me?
do you know how it feels to know that someone else has fallen for you?

do you know why on earth i keep on holding you?
embracing every memories that i have about us?
because life back then was simple
until you said your last goodbye.

I am just a drama queen
Another over dramatic teen
I sit and cry
When I could fly
But I choose to frown
And feel so down
Being so irrational
And acting all emotional
Pretending I am the center of everything
But I am truly nothing