In the process of showing, the veil wears thin
Tell me, is it easy to see the fear in me behind the wheel?
I've never known it to be as layers inside a Nolan dream
As for me and what I think, it's much less a fall
More of an untethered float
Where you can spin and you can twist so beautifully
Make movements so behemoth
You would make mountains proud
But mountains are invisible so far out in space
The movements you travel to make will make you stronger
The better current version of you
But people want to know how good they look
Through your eyes from where you stand
Half the matter in the end is that they'll never know
Secretly to them, we're hurt they're never curious.
Curious, what's that?

No sooner than my ankles and arches
absorb the reentry shock
My toes push off
Time to disconnect

I
used
to
cut
when
I
would
disconnect,

but
now
I
think
I'm
hurting
you
instead.

Fortuitously my memories are stumbled upon,
Like smooth river rocks beneath the flow of a gentle stream,
Triggered by an anomaly in the day,
A bump in the pavement,
A loud bang,
A missed step up a flight of stairs causing a momentary stumble.
The provocation for today was innocent:
My feet pushing against the artificial pavement--the treadmill
Memories seemingly harmless take a dark turn.
I'm now running down memory lane,
A dark well once thought empty,
Gushes forth with a violent burst.
Some memories, especially violent ones, call for severance,
Or the mind will deteriorate.
Heavy breath, sweat cascading down my brow,
This is the only time I can feel her talk to me,
You see, she and I are disconnected;
And we have been for quite some time,
I increase speed, not listening to her cries,
She pleads with me to stop, I ignore her.
The only acknowledgement she gives is a stabbing sensation,
She reminds me I have a heart and lungs,
She tells me I am alive.
My body and my mind are two separate beings,
One within the other,
Like oil and water,
We do not mix.

I've been on a journey
to the depths of my own
                                            mind.

i didn't like what i

l
e
  a
   r
    n
     e
      d

but i know it was needed.

                          I've been (dis)connected

up, down,up ,down u,p ,down

in (a)n(d) out

blur is what i see.

i know ::myself:: better now

we journeyed through seven seas
love gave you sea sickness
you wouldn't grab my hand
yet you touched my skin
i let you fall
and you froze into the ocean behind me
you were never my Jack
you were the glacier that sank your own ship
the shot that missed your ear
I was the diver, and you, the shark outside my cage
wanting my blood
only to discard my bones
you had me
disgusted
ashamed
disappointed
****** up

The boy was driving out
Before he forgot himself
“What did I believe”, he cried out,
“On the bookshelf?”

But it was awful chilly, it was
For an afternoon
So he turned to friends, but spoke none 'cause
A mouth don’t fit on a loon

Biding time with a droopy eye
And changed his name again
Goes by a fool with a cool catch
To earn his name on cement

He is the son of summer
Winter at his feet
Doesn't remember forgetting his innocence
No matter who he meets

Yes, ma'am, thats's a dual voice you hear
He seeks high fidelity
Fully faithful, a sun-fearing queer
The caricature to be

On the stage, the things that he wrote
Those memories bygone
Come crashing down on him and he can't emote
The clown's not having fun

Finding time with a droopy eye
And changed his name yet again
Goes by a fool with a cool catch
To earn his name on cement

He is the son of summer
Winter at his feet
Doesn't remember forgetting his innocence
No matter who he meets

Praise be to cherry pie
And all the faces that made me feel that I
Could settle on "by and by"

Praise be to anyone
That put me under the blistering sun
I'll get back there, its true

I just got more to do

Your hands around my waist,
heart synchronised to mine
          Captivated

Your fingers run through my hair,
radiating sunbeams of smiles
           Rapturous

You watch sunbeams dance in my curls,
body still as a winter's day
          Enthralled

You stare straight into my eyes,
your soul connects - to mine
          Serene

I turn my callous back, then
turn my face to you
          Nothing