"What if he'll break your heart?" My best friend asked.

"What if your heart shatters down into pieces and you don't know what to do anymore?"  My sister asked.

"What if someday, I will hurt you?" He asked.

"I don't have a heart."
I replied.

Lost in the music of childhood Saturday afternoons
Never before realizing
The broken soul she purged through impassioned verse and powerful refrains
This same music offering insight and healing
Songs wailed from the depths of my being
Tears burn my tired eyes
As I cry, never having realized i lived her pain
I am living it now, through my own wounds
Wounds i borrowed from her broken heart

I've written and scratched off
thousands of words that
I used to describe you,
Yet I'm still left with a blank page.
What am I to do with this?
I've written so much about you;
Every thoughts I have
Is a silent scream
That terrifies me to let out.
This blank page you left me
Leaves me thinking this lonely night,
So silent and calm that even in this darkness
I can hear that silent scream, **"I LOVE YOU."

I used to believe that nothing hurt more than disappointment.
Then I felt the pain of betrayal and believed that nothing could hurt more than the untruth of the one you loved most.
And now,
I'm throwing up from one too many cigarettes,
one too many drinks,
and I'm starting to believe that nothing hurts worse than feeling nothing at all.

I'm not sure of who I am anymore
I'm not sure of where I'm going
Whether I'm happy or sad
I'm not sure if I'll be alive tomorrow
I'm not sure if we'll be friends forever
Whether god will help me or not
But I am sure of something

I am like the wind,
                     Always changing,
                                         Never staying,
So take shelter,
                     I'll blow your house down just like you did me
                          When you left

i'm trying to forget you
but sometimes the memories sneak out of my eyes
and roll down my cheeks
and I miss the times when you were my happiness
but now you're my sadness too
and I can feel you forgetting me
pushing me out of your life
i don't even know why I'm trying so hard to stay.

Why does it seem that the most beautiful things are the most fragile?
My glass heart must'ave been blown mere molecules thin
because as much as I thirst to be yolked from within
and find union with the soul of another just as agile

I am broken, shattered into pieces, every piece repaired in time.
And as selfish as all of this may seem,
there is nothing about me, I have committed no crime
in wishing that my life were held dear... a dream

I suppose I am asking too much from these droves
of human animals compelled to suffer and starve for meaning
Meanwhile I cry out of sanity for their suffering and mine, which proves
that there can be no sense in leaning:

Reliance on other leads to sorrow,
when I look to you, you see you, do you see me? I wonder
do you see me? I will be here tomorrow
to ask again and again, do you see me, or is that your blunder?

I had it all,
If only I'd known that I had
I had it all & I lost it
& I feel the worst kind of sad
I lost it all.

To have it all
To turn back time
& have it all
His love be mine
I'd have it all

I lost it
I know only too well that I have
I lost it all & I feel it
It's the worst kind of sad
I had it all

My dad used to tell a story
   about the monster underneath
   the one that starts the mayhem
   the one that wakes at 3am

My dad have fought it before
    every sting that it had unleashed
    words and actions he wished he said
    reminded the monster under the bed

My dad told me "Be Strong"
     as the monster shifts its prey
     waits shamefully for the end of the day
     suicidal thoughts at 3am

My dad tried to save me
      words and actions are its claws
      every **** night i wished it'd paused
     but the monsters loved my prose

My dad wish it wasn't me
      he wish he could just take away the pain
      you're the monster I kissed back in the rain
      the memory that wakes at 3 am.