What would you do if I said I missed you?
Would you laugh?
Cry?
Scream at me?
I wouldn't be surprised, honestly.
Nor would I blame you.
Because of all the people in the world, the world's biggest train wreck chose YOUR heart to shatter.
Not once.
Not twice.
Not even three times.
But four.
Over and over again.
If you wonder how someone could do that to someone, it's not because I wanted to.
It's not that I was waiting for you to fall in love with me for me to destroy you in a different way every time.
It's that even if I give my heart a thousand chances, it'll break itself a thousand times.
It's that I was and am confused by my mind enough to hurt those around me and for that I am sorry.
I don't think I could apologize enough for you to believe me for a fifth time,
because darling I'm the girl who cried wolf and I always will be.
I may want something but *******
I'm too scared to follow through with anything and I see that now.
Not saying I didn't see it before but oh god do I see it now.

And with my monologue complete for now I bid you farewell.
And I apologize that I'm such a train wreck.

I gave you everything.
I showed you things I'd never shown
to anyone before.
I believed in you.
I kissed you.
I slept with you.

I was in love with you.
I felt used.
I felt *****.
After that day,
I couldn't see myself in the mirror.
I was disgusted with myself.
In the end I realized that I
was in love with the idea of you.
But why?
I have no idea.

A broken heart may seem as a tiny penny in an ocean filled with quarters and dimes
They were never seen as a thin line that separates life and death, let alone death being an option in this mind tangling, heart strangling, phenomenon.

But what if I were to tell you that the only light at the end of the tunnel may be God's hand knowing you can't stand on your own.
I bet you wouldn't believe that taking your heart out from its cage to put it with a river of rubies cascading down the hands of any liar can be a fight for life.

The tears of a struggle that pumps through the wings of your passion begin to flutter.
The contraction in your heart may be more than just a flicker of elevated blood pulsing through a valve, though it may actually **** you.

The heart pumps oxygen and blood all day and all night to give you life, but don't be deceived because the heart can be a brain entanglement board game because just as easily it gives life it can easily take life away. Never put too much trust in the ***** that is destined to stop.

Tears falling down on my eyes
Looks like a melting ice
As little as mice
Or maybe lice

I heard the crushing sound
That it makes when I see you around
Your kind of man where do I found?
I'm trapped in a circle that is round

They say loving you is the best thing to happen
but some things make me awaken
Lead me being broken
You played with me like a *kitten

Eloquently taking no formal shape
They are here to cool but not expire
The flames that have bursted
Or what has become to transpire

They roll like waves in a restless sea
With brute force they burst through
Tearing through your seams
Finger nails dug deep till it bleeds

Fighting to stay alive  
The flame slowly dwindles
Slowly suffocating from oxygen
Nothing else left to burn
Under atmospheric pressure
The flame collapses and expires
An abyss without measure

Coal and ashes remain lifeless
Only to rediscover the cycle of life
Enough remains in ashes
Against the odds it collides it clashes
To sustain a garden filled with life

Eloquently it breaks with no formal shape
It's cracks extend like mosaic glass
Desperately awaiting rearrangement
Awaiting to be pieced once more
Burnt, molted it has reached prime
To have rays of sun shine through it
One final time.

You drained the life from my eyes and took the skips from my heartbeat when you left. You packed my smile, my laugh, my creativity and my optimism in your bags along with all of our ugly memories and you left me with nothing but tears and an endless ache in my chest that I can never seem to mend. You left me to replay every memory of us that made me fall in love with you and now I don't even have the ability to think straight- all I seem to think is how I still love you and how you'll never love me back.

He looks happier without her by his side,
He flirts with all the girls he meets,
He doesn't talk to her anymore,
He pretends she doesn't exist

A month later

He glances at her when she isn't looking,
He doesn't understand,
He feels a little lost,
He doesn't fancy the girl by his side

Six months later

He tries to talk to her,
He stopped flirting with all the girls,
He loops his arm around her shoulder,
He doesn't understand why she pushes him away.

A year later

He misses her,
He misses her laugh, smile her words,
He wonders where she is,
All he knows is *She's happy