There once was a small girl
She always had a smile on her face
No matter what happened nothing seemed to phase her
Then one day that smile faltered
She had a monster in her brain
No one knew that something was wrong
Then one day it turned to hell
People noticed her weight loss
People noticed her flighty look during lunch
No one knew she was going through pain
All because  of one day
They forced her to eat
They forced her sit
They didn’t realize all this was a monster’s doing


People’s life stories are not what they seem
People like you and me each hold something hidden
Deep inside our heart
This world is becoming more self centered
Girls must be skinny
Guys must be Manly
The world forces us to be a certain way
Heartbreak is common
Calories must be counted
A smile must be across everyone’s face

Fast forward that Little girls life
She’s a 7th grader now
School is fine
She likes her classes and her teachers are great
But there is a voice in her head saying she will never be good
People telling her that wasn’t true
Her best friend turning on her
Her brain confused
What did she do?
How can she fix this
Then terrible news comes upon her ears
Her best friend’s mother and step father are gone
Two people who she loved so much
Two people who had a special place in her heart are now gone
Now she must deal with Grief at 13 years old
Life felt empty felt meaningless for that girl

People’s life stories are not what they seem
People like you and me each hold something hidden
Deep inside our heart
This world is becoming more self centered
Girls must be skinny
Guys must be Manly
The world forces us to be a certain way
Heartbreak is common
Calories must be counted
A smile must be across everyone’s face

A few years later she’s now a freshman
Life has become weird without them in her life
She now has a new best friend one that treats her right
Yet there is this feeling that she can’t shake
Why must the world hate
She hears the rumors the things they say
Her brain agreeing with them
She know she’ll never be perfect
Soon she begins to feel hate towards her
She can do nothing right
Her sun is now dark
Covered by clouds
She thought that she might never feel the light again
That monster was now back but in a different form

People’s life stories are not what they seem
People like you and me each hold something hidden
Deep inside our heart
This world is becoming more self centered
Girls must be skinny
Guys must be Manly
The world forces us to be a certain way
Heartbreak is common
Calories must be counted
A smile must be across everyone’s face

As the Years go on That little girl learns how to deal
That monster never letting her escape
Whispering sweet nothings into her ear
To keep her in his Grasp
She keeps silent to protect those around her
Stress is always with in her
It’s surprising she hasn’t been hospitalized yet
The Strongest of Hearts are always the Most Broken
The Saddest of people always cheer others up
But No one ever notices that she falls in love with this monster
Her life would be meaningless without him
Just like Romeo and Juliet this is a Tragedy from the Beginning
Lost in her world no one can shake her awake
Soon she will disappear into the Darkness with her new found Lover
The only person to know the real her

People’s life stories are not what they seem
People like you and me each hold something hidden
Deep inside our heart
This world is becoming more self centered
Girls must be skinny
Guys must be Manly
The world forces us to be a certain way
Heartbreak is common
Calories must be counted
A smile must be across everyone’s face

Now this little girl is almost all grown up
Almost 17 starting to drive
She’s been on an uphill battle
But she won’t fail
That monster still lives with in her
Not letting her escape
But She knows how to control him
But sometimes he becomes powerful again
And takes over her mind
It’s a rocky path from here on out
But she won’t lose to someone who is so shallow
That he doesn’t have the guts to come out
Cause That Little girl is me
I have the wounds from all my battles
And I’m trying to win this battle
In a war I never asked to join

Embers burn in a flash of light
Flying through the night
Flamboyant flames dancing
Dancing, it's the demon
The demon who follows me
Stares at me with its intense eyes
Flailing it's arms, taunting me
Taunting me in a provoking manner
Provoking me
Shoving me reaching
Holding me up by my shirt
My chest, infecting my lungs
Gripping me so tightly in its arms
Escape, I must escape I must
I must fight it
Silently
Quietly, without a word nor cry
Glaring intensely, infuriating
Fighting a battle that will go unsaid
Untold, unheard of, a tale with no writing
Battling and scarring each other
Determined to win, to defeat
To ****
We are determined to ****
One must die for the other to live
To live and grow, for our beauty to show
We must fight.
We must fight without sound
Without word of mouth nor page
Fight till one is gone
**** so one can leave

Amiss am I, awry I be, with thought's not of this sphere, O' how I thinkest of the real me. The real me with none dermis, the reality of none colored blood. I'm katharí psychí;
Of the empyrean love.

Wherein the substance and materials aren't bought, nor sold; I'm sick of the greed, the wantonness, that makes monsters out of men.

I've experienced wantonness, though verily it doesn't please me, I've tasted Lust's, and lust conceives sin;
Sin leadeth to death.

Lord Almighty, protect me from the demon's that never rest, nor do they sleep;

They art witty, unforgiving, they make men's heart's their places to eat and invest.

Renew me Yahweh in this mortal stress, keep mine eye's on thee; O'
Mighty king.

Free me of mine burdens;
And mine restlessness.

Let thine light,
Overshadow me.

© Brandon nagley
© Lonesome poet's poetry

Like a white bird in a blizzard
I'm invisible
In middle is where I'm delivered
Battling the freezing storms
No one notices, but that's the norm
The battles I wage are as silent
As the first feathery snows at night
This world is cold and cruel
There is no golden rule
One of these days when you finally look, I'll be found
Lying frozen to the ground

Secrets, secrets, are no fun, unless you share with everyone.

But what if the secret affects someone else?
What if the secret negatively impacts yourself?

Secrets, secrets

I try to clear my mind,
But it keeps popping up
Time after time.

Are no fun

I want to yell, I want to scream,
I want the whole world to know
What's eating me alive
And why I'm bursting at the seams.

Unless you share with everyone

I have been sworn to secrecy,
And I cannot tell,
I've sworn myself in,
And with this I dwell.

The past is heavy,
But secrets weigh more,
And with no one to tell,
My heart and brain begin a War.

I'm battling myself,
At every given instance.
And oh, how I wish
I could return to my days of innocence.

But I have been sworn to secrecy,
And now I cannot speak of it,
Such an invasion of privacy,
And a secret I can't admit.

But maybe, just maybe,
One day I will.
I'll get it off my chest
And will no longer feel mentally ill.

Secrecy does weird things
To a person,
And the longer it goes on,
The more their mental health will worsen.

Secrets, secrets, are no fun, unless you share with everyone.