your arms
wrapped around me
were replaced
by loneliness.
i feel now that i am not wanted,
but rather here,
a disturbance in the calmness
of your peaceful atmosphere.
my passions
have become your annoyances,
every word i speak
makes your eyes roll.
i've started to wonder
if it's you or i that's changed.
i feel like winter,
cold and unwanted;
sometimes like spring,
tremendous rainfall
on flowers that will never bloom.
i don't feel close to anyone anymore,
i feel like a quiet noise amongst ambience,
waiting to be heard.
but not everybody can hear.
how many times do i have to try
before you realize
you don't want me?
why am i teaching you a lesson
when you so badly
believe you're teaching me one?
and lastly,
who are you?
is it you that's changed?
you used to love me.
you used to take me as i was.
you used to treat me like summer mornings.
you used to be happy around me.
you used to appreciate everything.
you used to.
but now you don't.
and as spring turns to summer
and the flowers die out,
i hope you dwell on the buds
that never blossomed
for after all,
it is your ignorance
and my loneliness
that kills all life.
i don't feel close to anybody anymore
