Every pattern is a cudgel to pain
Every equation rings out your reign

Its on the whispers and tirades of the wind
Its in the ripple of water and crashing waves of the sea

Each sinew tugged at and tortured
Frayed nerves screeching and screaming at me

Begging for the holy oil,
the balm of relief
The anointing of peace

Yet even that hope lies shattered
in the broken pieces of usefulness  

Dis-ease
distorted harmonics resonating agony
where once was perfect and sound cohesion

Each moment now a taught tension
a pugnacious trap for excrutiation

Every device is a loaded trigger for wretched pangs all I want to to do is merely write
Of beauty and hope to soothe

What sabotage for a poet
Whose pain enscription was a grateful muse

I find nothing of comfort
Because, every idea breathes nothing but signals heralding yet more and more pain

Just like the photo of us dancing in the rain
I feel like it might never happen again

Memory is a Pain upon a pain
Mnemonics are the seat of my suffering again

And your mighty reign of anguish
An insanity that devours me

But I will not succumb
I will remain

I will come through this somewhat sane
And you'll be that forgotten memory
I refuse to let inside my brain

The rent will be sky high
And I WILL BE ME AGAIN!

Something stirring

A cautious hover
Over a breaking smile

gratitude spills
tumbling over the reverently held ether

life lives here,

moistened with
Blood, sweat, Tears and rain

Every fall a rise
Like the breath of providence

A dip left
A twist right

the rhythm of life inspires dance,
Poetry, art, music and song  

Like air slipping over chords

Sacred Verbiage

Vibration

Your hands are never empty

There is no void,

There is only the appearance of nothing

Which by the mere thought is even something

So grab on tight!

Even when it seems there is no thing

it really is something, isn't it?

Oh what we see, be and do when nothing is impossible!

It seems I can't get away from my inevitable destruction

I've tried too many times to counterfit my emotions

And I've searched like a blind man drowning

I've put my best foot forward only to find myself running backward

I've laid my best intentions only to find the road to ruin paved with the best of them

I've said a thousand and more times sorry

Only to end up having to say a thousand times more

I've dared to dream my dreams and grasped only thin air

I've allowed myself to be used and abused time and time again

Like some twisted self flagellation

only to find my self unrepentant without even knowing it

I've hidden from the truth only to find it find me

I've doubled down and doubled myself over it

I've built walls to dam up my failings only to find holes in it

always one hole more than any fingers or toes I've got for it

Troubles always seem to find me and worries never leave my mind

I'm not afraid to cry

And here I am still hopeful I've got one more time left  in me, and the will to try

Who knows, one day I'll win the tittle and maybe...

The distance between us seems endless

Yet you're only 2 feet away by measure

I wish I could reach you like I used to,

You know, in the way that a look,

or a penetrating thought could

Or that soul song we used to sing

when the world seemed perfect

Where You fluttered like a moth

And I danced like a flame

When I resonated through you

And your eyes used to burn deep into me

When your touch electrified

And my kiss hypnotised

As you sleep dreaming of flightful fancies

I hope I meet you there soon

But first, stop your ****** snoring!

Such a playful synergy
Your heart strings and mine
Thrumming on our frequencies

Drawing fourth sacred energy
Running on light beams
Dipping our toes into notes
And hands wafting in melodies

Dizzying highs and resounding lows
Shattering boredom
Stepping on apathy
And plucking joy from the air  

A glorious spiritual liturgy
How beautiful now since we've learned to pray

Drawing such sublime adventures
Going this way and that
Shuffling the order of truths and mystic mysteries
Coming full circle where withall
then bounding off again.  

Such a lifting of feet
a symphony of etherial musings

The tethering of our minds eyes
innocent daydreams
Making a mockery of darkness

Shining in the glory light beams
Bloated with gladness
Soaring with hopes

Soul Edifying

And that's just the beginning
Of our poetry.

In the hollow inside my soul

Rattling around a cage

scraping yet more and more flesh

I dont go down those steps anymore

But I can feel you scratching at the door

Dragging every sweet moment into the abyss of bitter

And the salt of my tears crystallised long ago

With nothing but dust to offer

The ocean of tears still drown me

And resurrection feels neither glorious or healing

Such long tendrilled fingers

Frightened to let go

I might have forgotten you

But you won't let me

Until you take every part of me for yourself

But I still walk forwards

And every day I will get further

And you will be but a pin *****

In my new tomorrow

And despair will forget my name

Im as gentle as the wind after a hurricane hit

My kiss is a twisted promise

My love is coughed up crimson

The splatters evidence of my self sacrifice

My warmth a radiating rage

My joy is an ironic *******

My Delicate touch traces incisions

What feats of tender assassinations

I've lined you up sweetly and discretely

Murdered what pride is on display

I move through your envy

I lick the tears like candy

I sleep through my nightmares

I love like I ****,

And you watch every line,

hoping I'm something different

But I've always been

Exactly what you wanted

And never needed most

It is not a quaint construction

Nor is it easily read

But as you enter willing by my own hand

you feel like you will fall endlessly

into the gaps,

not sure where you'll land

And if this viral way of thinking

gets in your head

And you start to feel at home here

Remember

You are always a welcome member

But like the rules of physics are twisted by unforgiving machinations

And reality also with the wielding of imagination

What is possible is

look and touch but

Do not expect you will not to be chided or derided

I reserve all my failings as your own

That's what happens

when you untuck the gray matter in here

You lose your bearings

And I'm in control

I own the red herrings

You are left senses reeling

Mental overload

You cant see who I am in the dark

You can only assume what I'm feeling

Words cannot describe

And I dont care for your descriptions here

What ever your tribe

Don't graffiti over my art.

Dont judge what's on display

You won't have to mind your manners

But you will have to find your own way

Just as you found your way in and maybe out

I never forced you to take part

I didn't try to **** or raise your doubt

I didn't ask you to sing my song

While it swims around your head

But I'm sticky like that

And I'm slippery too

I dont stay on one side or the other

And dont placate or back down

I dont think straight or bent

Here in this space I create my world

And you are just another visitor asking for rent

In a place already filled

And that's the magnificence of it

there's always more space to go around

I didn't hijack your head

I laid it out and you fed

You took it in

You made it

Poision

Or an

Antidote

I just write thoughts

and leave them lying

around as notes.

What else?

A tangled bundle of glistening threads

No hint of beginning, no end

What one thread looses

another one pulls,

The highways and byways of life

A stellar matrix

Star lit dot to dots

Jumping from one to the next

The riddle is read

But not in the way it is written

The answer is said

But not in the way it was given

Another black hole

Another pull form the inside out

I go there to find you

But by the time I get there

You are all hollowed out

Where did you go?

Where did I find myself?

How did we lose?

What have we found?

Another tussle

A pull of thread

And another journey

Beyond the veil

Dont say I didn't warn you

Sanity hangs by a thread

Only which one?

I let them get in my ear

and they didn't even speak

I let them cut you out of me

And I'm still bleeding and raw

A great deception

The law social of norms

The implied despotism

Of stigma

Of stain

But I am slain

I wear the eternal stain

Because I didn't love you

Like I should have

I Loved him more

Me and you

I say "_!"

You say "you too!"

You say "_!"

I say duck!

You throw _!



Just my luck!



And then,

a flash across an iris

A magnet of desire,

A silent pause

And we both start doing

Exactly just what we'd said we'd do

What use am I?

What shade of complexity could I bring

What understanding would light your mind,

If the torn edges of maybes or what ifs weren't defined?

The swirl of uncertainty wrapping your tongue

sticky mud of insecurity would never water down

What faith would you tread on ground?

Oh What clarity hate affords the messengers target

Face it

without me you would have no purpose

No navigation between left or right

Appreciation is a lost art

A snicker of light

I'm not offended

I am simply aware

But you,

You're stuck with that blank stare.

Behind the days bluish glow

I know you're there

I wait for sunset and while away

Until the midnight hour

Where your breath speaks to my soul

Where constellations twinkle

in sequence spelling out your secret name

And as I rise weightless

Leaving the old leaden sheath behind

The cosmos suddenly opens

A stream of concious light

Interconnected highways and byways

And the game of tip chase begins

Are you amongst the stars?

Are those your soul prints amongst the quasars?

I search for you,

With all the excitement

Of innocent eyes devouring the wonders

but you still remain for my efforts unseen...

The devastation

swift, like a thief I never saw

The Night never wished.



The old tide left me

Out in the darkness of sky

waiting the tides turn



I stood before you

Naked and afraid soul bared

And you just vanished



Delicate beauty

A lone tear ripped from my heart

No explaination.



In nothing I trust

Now love is a trustee but,

All of its own mind

If there is no ingredient list, is it true that there is no informed consent?

Can anyone can force anyone in to being part of an experiment?

If someone monitoring  me is ongoing and no one has been told what and how long monitoring happens can a person ask for clear statement of what ongoing monitoring means? And if so will they be monitoring my every move?

If a person is forced and  signs up for the experiment is health insurance or even life insurance affected?

I may need it,
Will they even pay out?

Can people quit from being in a trial at any time?  

Can such a poison as labelled and described in the  emergency plan really be forced on to a person?

What exactly do I gain?  

-----------------------------
***? Are you serious? Who cares? Don't be so dramatic!
Just take the **** thing so people can shut up and stop judging you for not doing what ever it is they think you should be doing. Its a ****** cycle, it's life, get with the program!
_______

What if I just tell grandma I  don't want to taste her new recipe for brownies in front of everyone at the fair because I dont like her salty brownies they make me sick?
-----------------------------------

Ok kid, its your funeral.

The beats thrum home

Each rise and fall,  

A rhythmic calm

Breath Whispers

Warmth nuzzles,

Lips graze

Fingertips trace

Imersed in contentedness

Love has coalesced

I have a warming glow

coalseced in the pit of my soul

giving rise to more profound insights

that are yet to claim their words.

I pray they do find them similarly

in days yet to come,

but the beats pass unavailed often.

He came and rested

like a bird on my shoulder  

Cautiously testing the suitability

and equilibrium of his perch

After a few inquisitive glances,

he seemed to ease.

I let out a slow careful breath...

Then another...

and rather gently built up a rhythm

so as not to startle him

lest he fly away.

And seemingly resolved,

he inched closer

till I could feel the flutter of his breast

and the gentle nuzzling of his head on my ear

My conciousness bade him welcome

such beautiful iridescent blues

straddled his white breast

and piercing blue eyes peered through

a velveteen mask

nestled upon a darkened beak

A striking fellow.

his weary feet belied his beautiful veneer

upon closer inspection,

I notice a small part of him missing,

maybe caught in some fierce struggle for life,

I had enjoyed him fluttering and flitting about weaving such wonderful things with trinkets collected from his travels

There was something ethereal,

yet lonesome in his posture

like that of a wise man

whose trials had marked

the strength of the lines

in his weary well travelled face

but a youthfulness glowed beneath

that smiling eyes could betray in an instant.

It felt like he knew me.

An old friend of the cosmos

that I'd crossed by and by.

And when I dared

and he dared,

our eyes met

and instantly our souls

recognised some ancient promise.

After an endless moment of acquiescence

He began to whisper his mystical wanderings chasing the astral turning of tides.

He whispered ancient mysteries in my ear,

of being lost in endless Odyssey's

revealing our secret truths laid amongst the stars waiting to transform

and reunite in some spectacular way,

some new creation

to flush away the yearning of brighter ways.

I pointed them out to him on the horizon

and I did my best to assure him they were there,

it was then that I spotted that low bow that

broke bare and it hung there

In front of him like a stalking giant,

oh well I whispered

"what's the meaning of existence,

if at least we don't try?"

And off we flew in a different direction

searching for some metaphorical chainsaw

to make for a clearer view.

We couldn't help but feel we were missing something...

Her grace and beauty blew in like a warm wind

Caressing the soul of one's creativity,

Raising blooms wherever she touched.

A blessing so powerful heaven could tear open with one thought and rain joy or tickle with delight!

With the same breath a tornado of hard hitting truths could lay down to rest when lyrically wrought

a gentle awakening from slumber

Without objection one would invite her careful dissection, the intimate eye of her perception

Her love is fierce as it is gentle, a stinging healing tincture

And she vanished just like the wind

But the feeling is indelibly there

And I fear always will be in memory only

And if so she unwittingly took my breath with her

On that stellar journey where were so destined to have met.  
So I will go on in suspense looking around every corner of every page for signs of her,

incase she decides to breeze in in that cool way she does and washes every eye anew.

Hold up

Enough of this bird drip

Wipe your nose and look up

Pathetic blind mice play 2 wise sheep

The artificial heart beeps

While yours bleeds

Your blood is coin

A fools folly of *****

Your child sacrificed

Cut to pieces and torn

Yet for the afflictedbstrangers you mourn

For animals you weep

Some to **** some to keep

Scientific lies poison your mind

Call the message fear

Call the message hate

Call the message division

God does not exist

Re-call the message

Re-call the message

Re-call the message

Fall asleep zombie

Fall asleep sheep

The lion sleeps tonight

The red dragon stalks

Green eyed monster

Gives birth to the invisible beast

A burden

Gray matter feeding artificial martyrs

You can do it yourself only you can't

You can be free only youre not

Poked with incessant panic

Prodded with incessant fear

Switch off

Recall the message

Recall the message

Recall the message

We are not saved in this world but the next

Unless...

We float over solvent crystals of life

Glistening in the all glory of our stars might

The wind winding round us

Sweeping up minute glitter

flicking the crystaline particles of life

As sparkles of radiance on our skin

A complement to sparkles in our eyes

A temporal tunnel borrowing the depths of faith

A moment hung in eternity

A transpiring of unspoken gifts and promises

Asilent understanding

A pledge of love in every realm promised

Agreement in the slow blink of an eye

sealed with polite fervour as a

Kiss over the salt waters

Cleansed and anointed by

The salt of the earth and holiness of the

Eternal presence the one who spoke existence

Consecrated by the eternal agapi in the struggle

Of the mystical meanings and the free will of our love.



A living story.

Falling like stars

The pitterpattern of a melting heart

Warming and filling to bursting!

Unstoppable radiance

Unfathomable joy

Casting loving designs and new paths

On once dark velvet

The light show ends

But the embers

burn through the fabric of being

Tearing holes in the hopelessness

Pain of release

Fingers of light reach through

See?

God is Love,

I told you!

They blinked

A film of Mystery

Drawn up

glassy shields

Deflecting truth

A dazzlement of lights

Leaving faded whispers

Trails of left stars

Burned up in some atmosphere

Signalling the phoenix dive

A refusal to meet fact

A skipped beat over reality

Dreams split into prophesy

Lips hung in the air

Pregnant with pauses

Lost in denial

They blink

As if they'd never known

Their love before

The truth was hovering

But neither one

Reached out to touch it

And none could figure out why?

There aren't enough words to say

what would be drowned by senseless description

of words that will never reach.

eyes flash heart beats in tandem

a waiting game

a predilection given over

the tempo aligns

the dance begins

an orbit around atmospheres

the tasting of ether

a blend of intoxication

and indoctrination

the scent of temptation lingers

the supple notion takes form

twisting and winding of a breath

interchanged with promise

a heavy countenance of anticipation

yet, touch was refused

and together they imagined

a different existence

beyond the plane of reality

to a place in the future

where two souls merge

into one magnificent phoenix

where love is always revived

in the tiny hope conceived

in each other's eyes.

The mechanics of your scheming
qualifies your genius.

A tool for destruction
an amalgam of evil prose.

A narrative of your choosing
A bastardisation of facts and excuses tantrums and lies

I see how you whimper and conive
your mark ****** into your hypnopsychosis,

control freak
Erasing my relativity

Desiring my spoils
gained despite your lifetime of torture

Careful analysis of my faults and corrections
My green grass,  the colour of your nightmares

Take your control,
I'll deposit my apathy as collaterol.

I'll tend my garden, you grow your pretty little weeds,
Line them all with cockle shells in a row

You may fool them,
But you dont fool  me.

How you conspire,
the same eyes, same lies

Keep Narcisis in your prayers,
you and your symbiotic succubus relationship.

Fein saints and martyrs
I'll climb higher while you climb into despair

What really counts is the truth that we bate
And the truth that we bare

And I saw you clearly,
I saw you both  

Smiting everything not of your own making
Your jealust consumes

What I create is your next toxic dream
You cant trample on who I am.

Masters of manipulation
Bar one

Your greatest fear;
My success,
My joy,
My hope,
My power in defeat;
Freedom from all your ****** up
Sicophantic dramas.

May you one day achieve the impossible
And be like me,

Nice.

The beats thrum home
Each rise and fall,  
A rhythmic calm
Breath Whispers
Warmth nuzzles,
Lips graze
Fingertips trace
Imersed in contentedness
Love has coalesced

Stars sparkle fourth pouring from your presence

I wish to drown in your atmosphere

Envelop me and wash me brighter,

Dancing lighter

Wafting higher

Set adrift on daydream's bliss from that almost kiss

Diamond lies washed with the tide

Cupids encrusted bow fell and the arrow twist

Now lives thoughts of midnight bliss

Never brought to fruition,

encrusting glittered remnants of impossible  dreams,

Littered along a blushed cheek and cherry lips that if ithey could;

would melt into an almost pefect kiss...

Stars sparkle fourth pouring from your presence

I wish to drown in your atmosphere

Envelop me and wash me brighter,

Dancing lighter

Wafting higher

Set adrift on daydream's bliss from that almost kiss

Diamond lies washed with the tide

Cupids encrusted bow fell and the arrow twisted

Now lives thoughts of midnight bliss

Never brought to fruition,

encrusting glittered remnants of impossible  dreams,

Littered along a blushed cheek and cherry lips that if they could;

would melt into an almost pefect kiss...

You call offensive speech hate speech

You believe in unnatural ideas and that they are infact natural and that you have been programmed to accept unnatural behaviour

You shut down debate and free speech -

Unless it is ideas you like and resonate with.

You believe everyone else is stupid because they don't have the same view as you

You believe what your idols say without question

You dont tolerate the beliefs of others

You believe that their propaganda is harmful and a programming tool for the sheep.


You believe everyone should think like you or else!

You hate people because of their culture or belief system does not match yours

You want to rewite or erase history

You preach people with the opposite views hate you, are insane and are to be feared and overcome.

You belive you are entitled to use extreme violence, hate speech, supression and abuse because your cause is just.

You call offensive speech hate speech

You believe in unnatural ideas and that they are infact natural and that you have been programmed to accept unnatural behaviour

You shut down debate and free speech -

Unless it is ideas you like and resonate with.

You believe everyone else is stupid because they don't have the same view as you

You believe what your idols say without question

You dont tolerate the beliefs of others

You believe that their propaganda is harmful and a programming tool for the sheep.

You believe everyone should think like you or else!

You hate people because of their culture or belief system does not match yours

You want to rewite or erase history

You preach people with the opposite views hate you, are insane and are to be feared and overcome.

You belive you are entitled to use extreme violence, hate speech, supression and abuse because your cause is just.

Sifting through the foul garbage of my mind,
I caught a glimpse of shimmering light,
I dug deeper and found more still,
I scavenged and I raked overcome by
a desperate mood
suddenly despair hung over me
I start clawing like madness
The more I scraped the deeper it got buried
The deeper I searched,
The more I was emerged in rank,
Swallowed up once again by that glimmer of hope
That was once aptly named You.

I'm still digging myself out...
When will I learn?

I have a right to discriminate

against:

The selfish

The lazy

The malicious

Thieves

Rapists

Paedophiles

Murderers

Terrorists

Rioters

Looters

And ******* in general

Whatever their race

- or as racists would define it, what ever their color.