hold my hand
so your thumb
can tap that beat
on my wrist
the one my heart
decided to keep

soul eater,
you make me wonder
what is the shelf-life
of good intentions?

Is this what they meant
when they told her love was a hurricane?


                     (it destroyed her cities
                      making her a refugee
                      inside of someone else's body)


If so,
she might have done without.


                     (and she was never any good
                      at building homes in new places)

He thought of her laugh
in the wet winters,
remembering what it felt like
to live in the warm summer.

Men
Made me promises
When I was young
And new
They didn't keep
Because they had known
No one would blame 'em
When I felt old
And used

If love can be a habit
I can be the nail
that you bite
with an absent mind

she thought he grasped
every atom inside of her
so gently
that surely she would break


                 p                               r
                                  
     a                                     
                                   a
                                                                           t

but he kept her all together

Let me

                     (Breathe myself into wind.

                            Sink until I’m water.

                                    Lay, for to dust I will return.

                                                  Then I can)

stretch myself into your bones.

pull up your bootstraps
wipe off your chins
our mouths may bleed
but these hearts
are iron armored
lets keep them out
just like we practiced

I've done enough burning bridges
And being burned
And in all these stories
I've never found a heros glory
Or a dragon to slay
Only a bunch of words
That couldn't make the endings change.

Getting older is getting lonelier
As people fall away and fewer stay
There are too many wrongs
For there to be a right
And even when it will all be okay
When it stops and I look around
The scenery will have changed.

one day,
if you think
to find me
i will not be

If we could've known
what we would become
I would have told you still,
out of breath
and full on in love,
that you were gonna be
my favorite home forever.
All of the lovely, broke,
young and dumb, sweet,
smirking son of a gun.

My ghost is pressed
Between pages of black ink;
Haunting bookshelves neatly labeled.
Fingers running down bound spines
vertebrae by paper vertebrae.
Memories that are trapped in fiction,
Lost by a to z organization,
Misfiled.

Men would break, bind,
and burn her some day,
of this she had no doubt.
But she let them crave it first,
until a reason had been found.
And when it was finally over and done?
The curse she gave was a hunger,
one that could never be overcome.

I can be,
Just by myself.


And yet;

If I could breathe a dream,
It would be the one on your passenger side window.
I traced the veins of my heart
And found you tangled.

loved at
minimum wage
left living
kiss to kiss
never enough
to save up

I wonder,
If I were born to walk the moon,
Would you shoot for me?

You’re Peg Tooth,
I’m Sticky Fingers.

Lets run until we hit the sun
hoping for matching freckles.

Tonight,
I've been made like poison;
Carefully measured,
Sweet and sour flavored.

May even your shadows burn bright so I can find them always
Or let your light be so shadowed that I may sleep in the glory
I will leave the shallow summer and wade into your deep winter
live in the seasons that keep in your favor
All I ask is that years take on forever
for time to keep us anchored
Yes all that I ask is that I shall ask at all and should you listen
anything can be rewritten

You           (stutter
                   like there's something more to say)
And

I                (move
                   like there's somewhere else to go)

we all fall prey
to the monsters we create

the shape of it shifts as we hold on to it, like water
it  f
        a
              l
                 l
                    s
                          throu­gh our f i n g e r s
while we blink it's shine from our eyes.

She echoes in his room
In the way only the empty ones can

Long after she's gone

I want to lick
Your disappointment

Taste your bitter

.  
                                                    l           ­       
                                                      
i looked at the sky     l
and                               a
wondered how to f

when everyone else
knew to fly

morning light
cuts my soul
gently divides
lost from whole

My thoughts tripped
into a current
aspiring to drown
themselves
across miles of binary
and lit up screens

They made her like a star
destroyer--

And never forgave her when she fired.

When every outfit change
And new man's body
Never made the feelings go away
She did it anyway
And you never understood
Why her dreams were so small
But the big ones never came
And the world ate every daisy chain
A little girl once made

You said jump in
And my bare skin burned
In the front seat

You said almost beautiful
And I watched every mirror
To find what was missing

You said use your words
And I used them all
Until my tongue was numb

You said straighten up
And my kinks were flat
against that hardwood floor

You said I liked make believe
And I knew
To go along with the story

When I was fifteen
They said I was young
And I felt younger still

the sharp sting of always
settled into routine
the inevitable of morning
each inhale brings
we're living an american dream
five days a week

Keep heart
And use
Explosives
As pillows for
Your heads
While we watch
From the softness
Of our beds

It is inevitable
to feel so small
on a front porch;
black and bright
sky stretched wide.

we are the south pole
of different magnets
that will never come
t   o   g   e    t    h   e   r
now go attract a north

the mess inside my head
is as tangled as my hair
on your monday morning pillow

The halves that made me
Left me only pieces
To make my whole

a paper blue square
took me miles high
to touch the sky
a cosmic make out
melted on my tongue

when did all this time
become about passing mine
turns out
5 years and 3 months
isn't all that much

when the end comes
if we have an after
promise we will
spend it together

she was born a half formed thing
holes in her soul
not enough effort left over
to raise her better
in her gasping wet breaths
she tried to be smaller
but only swallowed more
becoming lovers with her failure
missing the eyes and ears to know
she reached for an absent future
only learning later
she was made in the perfect shape
of their shame

painted
by my own hand
I wore my heart
and its resentments
on my mind
for all to see,
daring him
to look away.

She loves his body
The way it fits just right
against her lips
And she kisses each rib
As a thank you
For holding him in it

kept a smile
through that
tornado
of impatient
anger
and said
"please,
come again"
you wild
bag of wind

its a violent thing
love being blown apart
to only later
be remembered
like an overly friendly
stranger

the arms of a
grief weighted blanket
held her to sleep
every new night after.

Marie was always placed in the middle
until suddenly ushered to be in front.
And when often mistaken for others
rather lonely, being a first, would it become;
but in the end ultimately determined
it was an affront not meant to be unjust.
Maybe it was a clever thing that was received,
a gift to make people always fondly think of another,
from givers that never felt a need to think of it any further.

.      when she reached
       her fingers brushed blue
       she went to reground but
       her feet had forgotten how