Today
marks the day
of a new kind of Triumph
My whole life I have sought your approval and praise
Knowing that in me you were always ashamed
Humans have always feared what they don't understand
But I am done being cut by the knife in your hand
Today is my freedom, I've escaped the cage!
Now your attention I no longer crave
I've taken the knife from your bloodied embrace
I've taken my freedom and I won't leave a trace
I've been held back and held down for far too long
What you see as my weaknesses are what make me strong
I know I am an oddity, a wild one, a mystery
But my twisted mind's what allows me to truly see!
I see when the end justifies all the means
I'm learning to listen to the voice in my dreams
Battle cries are everywhere and I know now to listen
I've been Awakened and through Triumph have risen
I see your embarrassment from my strange behaviors
But today I see past all your noise and distraction
I no longer care what you see when you look at me
Not ashamed or afraid, today I am free!
You didn't like the way I listen to music- so called it "cultish" and told me I couldn't do it in public, even in the car since people could see through the windows
You despise the fact that I'm bi- so you call it "identity issues" and tell me to tell no one
My plurality scares you- so you say it's dangerous and to keep it to myself
You don't understand my daydreaming- so you say I do it for attention
You despise how I stand up to you and speak for what's right- so you shut me down and tell me I'm the problem
Any time I try to tell you the pain you are causing me, you turn me into the bad guy
I may have no power now, but someday, when I walk out the door and never see you again, perhaps you will be cured of your Machiavellian, narcissistic, emotionally abusive evil before you hurt any more people.
Today I Triumph: for YEARS I have wished I didn't care what you thought of me, wished it didn't hurt when you emotionally abused and gaslit me, and made it clear how ashamed you were to even be around me and my uniqueness. It's as if you're allergic to color and individuality and anything different than your bland narrowmindedness. I'm the one who should be embarrassed for you! It's tragic!
Today, I finally broke free of the cage that was your judgement. I no longer feel the need to prove myself to you or even talk to you. We're fine on our own. We are finally, finally learning that we can't trust any of you, no matter how much you guilt-trip us into believing you're good people. You made us what we are. It has been hell, but we are grateful to you, because now we are special, strong, Enlightened! You call us crazy because you are afraid we may be right. You will never change, will always choose to abuse instead of treat us how we deserve. You have broken so much inside of us, things that will never be fixed. But we've built new ways of surviving, ways people may call insane or cruel, but we do what we have to to keep ourselves safe. We will never be able to stop loving you despite it all, but we no longer need you and you can no longer hurt us. Maybe someday we, or I, at least, may be able to forgive you.
Alii Semper Vincemus!