I am reading your each and every word
You are being heard
It's just, I don't know what to say
I'm lost today; every day

But I'm not broken lost
My mind is freshly tossed
Thrown to some new destination
Spending time on creation

I'm dating someone who doesn't hurt me
It's all so new, you see?
And I feel like a *****
Because I don't trust that he won't switch
Sides

I've been tricked and teased and lied to
Too many times too
To many times to
Trust another heartbreaker- not this one too

But I'm outrageous; I'm a fool
He's an angel, not a tool
I'm stupid; I'm ignorant
He's glorious and innocent!

But maybe- I don't know
Because at first it doesn't show
He's out to hurt me
Just wait and see

A week from now I'll be cut up dead
Left in the shed
All because I trusted a boy
Who got tired of me, his brand new toy

And what the **** am I doing-- thinking
I'm not thinking I'm sinking
Sinking further and further into love
And romanticizing every accidental shove




Now, I won't tell you not to smoke
Hell, every once in a while a spark a ****
And threats won't convince you
And lies won't deceive you

Now, I won't tell you it'll get better
But I hope maybe I can help with this letter
I can't trick you into being happy
Event through my attempts which are sappy

But I'll tell you, if I may,
And I ask that you hear what I have to say:
Life is in color
So open your eyes and try to love her

I didn't see the beauty in things
I never had an innocent desire for wings
Until I picked up a paintbrush
And created colors oh so lush...

If you're r missing a color, find it, and if you can't, create it. That's a good way to live your life.

Getting drunk at the bar
Knowing I won't be going far
Getting high off a line
Hoping for some godly sign

On this city Christmas Eve
I want to leave
But I can't move my feet
Can't face the street

Missing my man
Cursing him - ****
For being two years gone
In his life I was just a pawn

I would let anyone lie next to me
In the darkness I cannot see
I crave human touch
I don't ask for much...

When my body is strong enough
I sleep around
Go out with boys who are tough
I make lots of sound

When my body is strong enough
I get high
Let guys be rough
I close my eye

Now my body is weak
I look around
Too sick to speak
I won't make a sound

Now my body is weak
I look at a boy who smiles
I turn my cheek
For the daily trials

But when I look back he still smiles
And I can't help but smile too
I think we could run for miles
In reality I could move a foot or two

But this happens every time I fall ill
And we never talk when I'm well
But I'll smile at him still
Only time will tell

If he becomes more than a childlike attraction in my life...

You might think it's *****
But to me
The things that are *****
You cannot see
You have to
Feel.

He will

Kiss me hard
Touch me where I am scarred
Throw me out
Scream; shout
Remind me I am worthless
Make me wordless
Use
Abuse

But he will

Love me softly
Come home promptly
Take me out
Ask what I am all about
Remind me that he needs me
Compare me to a beautiful sea
Find me when I am afraid
Give me aide

And he will

*Always cry himself to sleep

Music that makes you cry
And a love that makes you want to die
A beat that makes you scream
And someone with whom to scheme

A world that never ends
The impossibility of making amends
A colonization you can not escape
The place that will never take shape

Taking over my mind...

Little bells
Only time tells
Listen as they ring
Promise not to sing

Music starts slow
But picks up fast- let's go
Bass high
Don't look me in the eye

Fill a pipe
Up the hype
Inhale green
What you've seen

Unzip my jeans
Don't care what it all means
Backseat of my car
No such thing as too far

*Don't talk to me; I don't care who you are.