"In this time of sadness, I imagine that white dress."

My my how my words show
Just like this alcohol flow
Fluid and without beat
But I need to take a seat
Why do I look at my feet
Not to cry but drinking liquor neat
I dont look back and get sad
I get so frustrated, no not mad
I feel like nothing was really taught
And all the times we chose to fought
Felt like such fake effort to please
Though captivated you actually brought me to my knees
In the actual end
With nothing to mend
I'm just simply disappointed
Because my heart gave you love
You shouldn't have been appointed
But **** it we and fun right?
I don't know, goodnight

Without you I'm content with life
All you did was brandish a knife
And named it love, but the hilt was made of self-deception
That you'd go for like an interception
Just like you'd intercept my feelings
With playing the victim and all your dealings
With the demons you swore to never be
We'll see who you become when you can't leech off me

Broken dreams
And split seams
It's all it seems
In endless streams

I'm nothing but shambles and the words I can't write.

I think the worst pain is when your heart is reaching out for someone's who isn't reaching back

It's time to watch the old me die
Like, who the **** was that guy?
Dead in heart,
Constantly plagued with 'Why?'

It's time to shed this shell,
Stuck in my own personal hell.

With a new found inner spirituality
I'll personify peace,
Making it my reality.

Peace out,
Because I have no doubt
I'll be much better with you not about.

I find the moments you aren't here, the absolute worst.

Life is but an atom to the universally imaginative ones

I'm waiting for something
I just don't know what it is
I sit here all day
Just wasting away
I'm waiting for something
I just can't figure it out
I sit here all night
Searching for the light
I'm waiting for something
I think I know
I'm waiting for my moment to thrive
My moment to feel alive

Nature hugs each step
Time warping through lush forest
Lost in Mother's abode

There is a war in my heart
When did this start?
I feel like I'm caving in
to myself from within

Such a heavy weight on my chest
Can someone take a little and leave me the rest?
But there is no one in sight
Just me outside and alone on this starry night.

This pain is getting the best of me
fading away of what I used to be
I can feel the raging war
My heart grows fierce even more

I fall to my knees gripping my heart
It throbs about to burst apart
I sqeeze my eyes shut to the pain
Feel the water run down my face from the rain

Then I hear someone close by
I look up and begin to cry
For who I see in front of me
Is the couple we were meant to be

I wander to where I was last
I sit
I read
Your name, the dates on the stone in different contrast

There is a War in my heart
I pray it will be the last

Those dreams that leave you terrified even in the light

Two bottles of wine
Disguised by dude I feel fine
No I don't because my love I left behind
Mistreated and accused
Physically and verbally abused
I know I'm to accuse
I'll never ask for more than you to understand
That sometimes I'm just a man
At a young age saw fear as manipulation
Which created such internal complication
My father's hand at my throat like a knife
Always and fearlessly threatening my life
If only people could see the path I've walked to do
They'd gain the understanding of what I've also been through

Tunnel vision for lies
Wrapped in silk white
For the many one cries
Creating a craving blight

I can't seem to find who I am meant to be
Who is this inside of me
My mind is torn in two
It can't make up what to do

The real one I do not know
The real one I want to show
I'm lost in this limbo
Of scattered pieces of me falling slow

I need to find the real me
and make that the reality
that I must be
For people to see

But I'm lost in this scattered place
All of me gone, without a trace
What is it I  have become now
I don't think I can ever change, but maybe somehow

I'm on a stairway to heaven
I wished for it at eleven eleven
Though it was a wish you'd figure
That it wouldn't be me to
Pull the trigger

My walls are my fortress, but also my personal coffin.

Write like you learned something new
Write like you've learned who
Inside you that has the answer
No it's not in him or her
Use your words to find light
Not to lay waste to a effortless fight
Use your words, black ink on white
To learn about others and yourself and take flight
Don't let your own words become your enemy
Because then your heart looks at you
Saying to stop hurting you and me

If I could just hold your hand once more

Just once more

*My heart could stop feeling so bruised and sore

All you do is cause commotions
And drink love potions
To no avail the calm seas
Are now storming oceans

Created by the consequence of your negative emotions

I am yours
So let's close the doors
Sip a glass of wine
To cross the line

To a place between intimacy and lust
It's me you can trust
I'm the painter you the canvas
We'll both just practice

Lips tracing your jugular vein
All pleasure no pain
With everything to gain
The path is lain

I'll find that you within
That doesn't mind simple sin
While skin to skin
Once titatium now tin

Bending and moving with ease
I'll do all you please
I'll fulfill your needs
Every whimper just new pleads

"The bullet struck the Kevlar, then making it so useless."