smudged ink and lipgloss. is this me?



what I wouldn't give to be that blue rubber band around your wrist



I wish I cold crawl into your skin and stay there. is this love?



id give anything for you to touch me. please, I'm asking nicely



when you touch me I swear my skin catches on fire and for you? Id burn if you asked me


an: again, if you like this style or my work please let me know! I want to actually publish

I think about you...from time...to time



I want to be right for you



what do I believe? in a god? in you? in me?



a short time with you has left some scars I fear will never heal



you're a skeleton in my closet that keeps scratching at the door.



AN: Hi yes if you like these poem pleas like or comment! Im actually debating publishing my short poems!

With your whispers
In the hollow of my ear
And your gnashing teeth
Along with the touching of ribs
I want them traced
You want to break them
The natural charm you have
The flash of a small smile
I'll beg for a kiss
You beg for more blood
And ripped flesh
All I want
Is to be loved by you
To be cherished
I want to be the only one
So please
Destroy me

I want you
So ******* bad
The in between my thighs ache
I want to kiss  your lips
Until they are a raw blue
I want to dance my lips across your neck and collar bones
Leaving bright red seeds that will burst into purple blossoms
I want to track down the planes of your stomach
All the while you whimper for me
My name circling around us
Squeezing us both into a warm embrace
I want to take all of you until I can't no more
Until it physically hurts
I want you deep within me
In my soul and in my body
I want to know what your slow, low moans sound like
Deep in the night time
I want to feel all those colors burst out around
To know what you feel when you are completely satisfied
I want you, but you are not mine

Things that make my stomach hurt
White Mazda Tributes
Fern tattoos
Earrings
Fancy restaurants
Guitars
Queens of the Stone Age
Girls named after birds
Brown floppy hair
Soft brown eyes
And lastly....
You.

I have stomach aches
Caused from the hole deep within me
Where the butterflies ate away at the flesh that I was
You see butterflies are nasty little things
They like to come when you want…to come.
For that special someone
But I have butterflies for people that don’t know I do.
So I tried to fill the hole with honey
With vanilla
With anything that I could get my sticky fingers on.
The only thing my fingers got on was me
And then they got me off
Because I have this hole
This deep burning hole that gives me stomach aches
That I want to fill with peaches
With kiwi
With pomegranates
Sometimes the stomach aches come in the night
When I lay there in my peach colored sheets
Pulling at an old band tee shirt until it comes off
And I become a writhing mess in the witching hours
But sometimes my stomach aches for the boy that wears sweaters
It twist and turn and the hole will scream from my abdomen
“Give me”
I want to kiss his lips
I want to stain his sheets with my ***
But then the ache goes away
I’ll get an ache for the arrogant and snarky boy
When he sits there with long, admirable fingers
I want him to dig them into me
And sometimes my stomach aches for me
It aches for the day that I can completely satisfy myself
In every aspect a human ever could

When he left my mother told me something.
She said it's okay and this will pass
He's nothing compared to you
But as I laid there
On my bedroom floor
In the room where he claimed me
Where little girl dreams were shattered
I didn't believe her
Instead I screamed about how I hated life
How he left me like dust on my fingertips
Like the ash of my burned down home

Two weeks later and I'm a shell
Of who I was
Of who I am
Of who I'll ever be
My ribs poked out like piano keys
Just waiting to be played
And my collar bones
Oh they were waiting like glasses
Glasses expecting hard liquor
That I of course drowned myself in

The day her name left his lips
I was done for
I wanted to become nothing but earth and essence.
But my best friend cradled me
She promised I would find love again
That this hurt, no matter how bad it is,
Will only be temporary
I didn't believe her
So I rebelled against them all
It was only me

4 months later and I'm sitting in the car
My best friend sits beside me
I'm genuinely laughing
And she looks proud
Then she tells me how he's talking about me.
From my ******* boots
My infatuation with peaches
To how I harbor guitar pics on every inch of my body.
I relapse into him immediately
I wanted him so bad

6 and a half months later and he tells my best friend
That he hates me
My name swims out of his mouth on a raft of profanities.
But it didn't hurt as much as I thought
I think I grew
Little by little I became the new girl
The one that writes again and breathes the air a little deeper than the others.

6 and half months plus 3 days
I caress my fingers over my body
The shower beats down on me
"I want to be your friend" I whisper to myself.
He was nothing but a thunderstorm
But I am more than he
I am the sun
The moon
The stars
I am the heavens
I am the thing everyone revels in
And I made it through hell and back
And now I can finally say goodbye

Hey you love me right?
Let me send you something
Let me intrude into your thoughts
When I am not there
See my naked body flash before you on that tiny screen
Did you get it?
Let me send another and another and another
Until all you can do is bleed from your cheeks
Until that pit in your stomach begins to tighten
Until you want that sweet, sweet sorrow filled ecstasy only I can provide
Now I can stand before you
The nudes I sent were sanded down
I was the epitome of what a **** really is
Not one stray hair visible
Not one, single intrusion
But here I am
Rough bumps, bones sticking out, intrusive hairs
But when I am not a **** I am your girl
So sail across the sea that dips down in the hollow of my back
Hike your way up mountains made of thighs
Let me show you something
Put your fingers in
Everything feels so soft and warm right?
Now take them away from me
Lick the lust from between your fingers
Does it taste like vanilla and caramel?
Make me yours
But you can’t
Or is it that you won’t?
You may even refuse to
So a **** can cause chaos on a sun filled day?
But honey I am a thunderstorm
I sanded myself down
I became a **** all for you
So what happens when my own fingers trace my hip bones?
When I climb the mountains?
Can you be jealous of something you never even had?
‘*** now please’ flashed at you
My teeth seem to rip into my own lust
Yet all you want are my nudes
You don’t want me fully and entirely
Is It alright for me to sink my own teeth in?
Until nudes and lust come flowing out
Oh but wait, they will wrap around you completely
Because my nudes and lust will always come back to you
So you love me right?
Let me send you something
Another **** appears
And another
And another
And another

We were born from the same star
But stars burn out
So we did the impossible
We fell here
To this safe haven
But what is safe when it's gripped by your screaming?
Can nudes save us?
Can pure, ****** passion break us until we are fixed?
No
So someone picked us up
They made you, a glistening beacon of love and hate
Then me, a scared girl made up of the whole universe
They tied us together
A red string
Connecting us here                   and                          here
Our pinkies only tied together almost like a physical promise
But now that tiny red string is being cut
Now its frayed and worn and tired
Kind of like me
So they made us into matches
But those burn out too
So maybe it's not we or us
It's you                              and                          me
­I can remember so clearly the day you left
The day you whispered I love you still
So my bones became brittle
I fought the universe within
I broke down until only nebulas and stardust was left
Because we can't be us again
There can only be
Me
And
You

Oh my, I never thought I would do this?
I am completely in love with you?
And how might I know this?
Well, every time I see you it's like I'm in the 1920s
I hear jazz music and my heart begins to sway
Yet this is all so new to me
You're the reason I live now
Hell, you're love could start a war

But here's the thing
We fight
We bicker
I cry and you get mad
But I am in love!
I wouldn't trade the fighting and the bickering for anyone else
Never could I ever
Because I know about the drugs on the street
But when you came into life I started drugs
You were the drug that has brown eyes and a heart beat

I don't believe in a God
But I believe in her
So I call her my universe
The way her eyes shine like the stars
And her skin silky white like the moon
And her lips are the galaxies edge
She could destroy with them
Stars and nebulas burn within her
Some even ask if the galaxy was modeled after her
And they all answer the same.
Yes,  because she is infinite

I ******* hate you
I hate every fiber of your being
You made me love you
You made me want you
You ******* made me feel loved
Then you crushed me
You broke me
You ******* chose her
After you told me you wanted me
It's all your fault
You ******* made me leave him
And now he is the one I want
I ******* hate you
But hate is a strong word
So I will say this
I despise you

Rip me apart
Scatter the pieces
Scare my thoughts
Enhance my doubts
Shred me up
Stomp me into the ground

I'm going to tear you apart
Be your worse enemy
Make you want to forget
Punch every inch of your flesh
Then let me pull you towards me
And let our lips connect

Our minds turn to scribbles
You pull me tight
I yank your hair
But our kiss
It is so lovely
Now my dear...
I didn't think we are capable,
Of being fixed
But I have to say, my love
*We make a lovely mess

I can't be in the same room as you
Why?
Because my breathing quickens
My pulse begins to race
Red paints over my cheeks
I just want to walk up to you
To touch you
Feel your heart pulse under my hand
Trace my fingers on your skin
But I can't...
Because I can't be in the same room as without shying away

I met a man
I met a woman
When I was driving down the interstate
While I was driving down this road
An interstate of broken dreams
A road of blood and tears of others
He seemed different
She seemed mysterious
I was running from the past
I ran trying to catch the future
My car collided with his
I met her when our cars collided
Now we don't know each other
She seems to have forgotten
Now here I am sleeping
I am just laying here
Can you hear me?
Are you near me?
Can we pretend to leave...
And then meet again...
When both our cars collide?

She's thousands of miles away
And I am here
You love her despite the distance
And I'm standing five feet away, screaming at you
I could lie and say she is good for you
But I can't lie to you
Chose me, pick me
Let me be the one
Love me and not her
I know she is what you want
But I'm what you need
You're so perfect in my eyes
I could show you by hugging you, kissing your lips, and holding you
But her internet hugs are apparently better
Oh but the way I feel about you could make galaxies explode
And well she is just some ******* the internet

I wonder why my thoughts wander to you
When it's 3 a.m
And it's dark outside
And I am lying in my bed wide awake
Maybe it's because I named you 3 a.m lover
Or maybe it's because of the pills
I'm unsure of myself right now
You are imprinted in my mind
A burning image there
I just can't sleep
The pills are keeping me awake
And the image of you haunts me
But the hardest part is letting go of my dreams

We sit here at a small table
Our feet slightly touching
My pretty little blue dress
Your flowing white shirt
A pair of little, white high heels
A simple pair of black Oxfords
My small, pale hand wrapped around the tea cup
One of your hands encased mine while the other held a small tea cup
He smiled then said,
"It is funny that we are sipping on tea."
I pondered this for a moment then,
"Why is it funny?"
"You are more like a shot whiskey than tea."
But we just sat there sipping our tea

We made love notes
Etched into each other's skin
Soft pinks and crimson reds
Dancing over ivory skin
Delicate to the touch
Secrets hidden within them
They made shapes
Beautiful little shapes
Rounded like roses
Darker towards the center
Fading in color as they fan out
We made love notes
Written on delicate skin