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Iliana May 2020
loverboy,

I cannot remember the last time I looked into your eyes without imagining a
blue-sky Sunday coffee type of day.
The type of day where I sit by my window and yearn for an exit outside of the hole I’ve fallen into.

I’m sure you didn’t mean to do it.
It was I who dug a hole and covered it with leaves thinking you’d fall into it just as I had.
I remember how you didn’t even turn around to face me as I tumbled down and under.

You didn’t even hear me fall.

Don’t worry, I don’t blame you.

I used to play with a fire too hot to hold. I still do.
I let it burn right through me with hopes that you’d see.
Apparently I was so bright that I blinded you.

You couldn’t see

Why couldn’t you just see me?

It’s not that hard, dear lover boy. I didn’t just rip out my heart,
I carved it out from my unwilling body

because it beat only for you.

It was useless in my own self. Why didn’t you just take it?
Offered right here on a silver plate

It beat for you.

It’s all right.

It’s all my fault

Covered in autumn leaves, the gaping hole inside me wasn’t big enough for you to fall through and return the very ***** I entrusted to you.

I don’t blame you.

I’m sorry.

-lovergirl
to the boy i gave my heart to
Mahogany Ree Mar 2020
when he moves
the same way the bow moves across the strings
he’s harmonizing with your ecstasy

let him be the lightening in your background
while plays on you
lays on you
trumpets and blows you . . .
... caressing you
with the tips of his fingers
let them linger
over and through
your love notes.....
keep playing for her
laying on, her
strum her pain with your craft
let her succumb to your storm
Nidhi Sharan Jan 2020
Being Vulnerable does not come easily to Me!
To be heard and felt, to hear and feel felt like emotions with no meaning,
Then you sailed through and entered my space and saw things which I had not been able to place,
on the very landscape of my heart and soul, and you drilled a hole,
On the fabric of my life- spread and somehow, I experienced “wholeness” once more!
I became someone who feels and expresses and is not afraid to take chances,
This is a person whom I used to know, the original Me and Myself,
I gradually started to break promises I made to myself,
of not being vulnerable, emotional or open to any feelings,
I don’t want to hide behind this façade anymore,
Longing to feel the sun burning my skin once more,
I'm glad you exist, even if it’s on a different plane,
For through our interactions every time, there is so much I gain,
Pain is not what I have feared, it’s the explosion of joy that I don’t know how to handle,
Guess what? being vulnerable still does not come naturally to Me
Its only when I look into your eyes, which reflect the expectation of pain back to me,
Even though we are both smiling at eachother in this moment now,
For you and I are overlapping spaces, torn and ravaged blue
and for both of us, it is our very own Vulnerabilities which binds us like glue!
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