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Vampirecadence May 2020
Change:
I hate this anxious feeling just before a change,
Hate to have this feeling when I feel overwhelmed and everything becomes hard to manage,
Heart beat runs faster than train,
this makes me feel so drain,
Man! Why it doesn't have a stop
just like a train?
It makes me feel dizzy,
when I try to control,
Makes me wonder
from where It comes,
all of sudden,
I lost in its thunder,
And it does rain,
When it makes me completely lose my brain.
Hate to have this feeling just before a change.
Cadence Aurora - 19th may, 2020
Time -  7:54 PM
Vampirecadence May 2020
Sleeping dreams:
Your dreams that you see
while you are sleeping is your
summary about your fears,
it is what you've seen just
before you've went to sleep,
it is what you've watched
this whole week,
it is what you've seen that
made you freaked,
It is what you've heard about
yourself that how much you are a creep,
It is what your mind told you
about you or about other.
That's how it becomes deep,
the more you think, the more you sleep,
It is everything that's planted within
you and how you are perceiving it,
mixed with no laces but  with so
many different faces.

- Cadence Aurora / Vampire Cadence
15-5-20
Vampirecadence May 2020
My tissue got a scar over all my weary skin,
my tears got not tissues to clear my sin,
bearing all those scars, I've been with none but with myself in war,
I killed myself over and over, those scars now is a shining surface,
I try to hide my face,
Because sometimes I feel disgrace.
I wish I could go back and replace.
9-5-20
Vampirecadence May 2020
OCD
OCD is a mind wreaking thing
that starts slow
just like a rollercoaster
but as soon as we think,
it's the end here,
there is another up and down motion
that controls our head.

It goes out of control
and the kind of restlessness,
it gives, is nobody can think of.
To think beyond its web,
becomes next to impossible.

You lose your sleep or either sleeps a lot
just to hide from the fears that lingers in your head.
Every breath ends with a sigh!
It's horrible!
I have felt it that's why I know it.
2:39 AM - Cadence Aurora / Vampirecadence
Vampirecadence May 2020
Brackets:
These brackets,
Big and small brackets,
I don't like its taste..
that's why I hate,
It makes me show,
You have to keep your feet..
here and not there,
as If I belong somewhere
but no where..
I want to make things clear,
No one can show me
If I do belong or I don't belong..
Keep this thing in you clear.
These boundaries you created
is your own mind creativity,
Keep it up to you within
your mind shell,
and just go to hell
that's where you actually belong
and don't ever try to sing this same song.
3:30 AM 4th may 2020
Vampirecadence May 2020
Hey!
It's Tea!
Wake up!
Here is your tea
in your favourite cup,
now don't stare at me!
Get up!
Don't snuggle!
It's my last warning! I'll shake it and drink it
if you won't take it.
4:18 AM
Vampirecadence May 2020
It doesn't feel what's real or unreal
once you lose the control of your breath,
It seems heavier everything inside
and no one to understand what it feels like,  
It's the real mess!
Just someone immersing you with its ******.
and you can't shout or speak out,
all you do is stare but no one look out
when you are trying to breathe,
but inside you are dead.
I wrote this at 3:09 AM. I love writing at night and that's when I feel more me and less the other me which I'm not. I feel peace within me. I had rough days where dark used to feel scary, now I'm loving night.
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