you are a cluster of stars
you are too great to touch
but as i lay in warm grass
and gaze up
i could never feel alone
i find comfort in your darkness
this starry night is my home

Those eyes captivate me
When I look into them
I lose the ability to breathe

Those eyes reach into me
They grab my stomach
And tie it in a thousand knots

Those eyes devastate me
I cannot know about the
Universe that lies inside them

Those eyes are a mystery
But a miniscule clue
Has been left behind...

And I don't know what to do.

Absolution in your embrace
I bring you all that I am.
The sleepless nights of my past
suddenly become weightless.
The uncharted sea of the future
appears dauntless.
For I know I have you.

I can give myself to you wholly
because I am whole.
I am the stars up above and
the deepest depths below.
I am a universe within the world we share.

Drawn towards you like the opposite end of a magnet
I am the whole half of you.

Immersed in God ecstasy
and orange robes
the true bhakta’s thoughts
are always on God, for God
and of God
armed with pure love
the slings and arrows
of maya, good, bad and outrageous fortune
are averted
God and His beloved
whirl across the bhakti path
dancing with Rumi, Kabir,  St. Francis  Meera Bai
and all the beautiful bhaktas
for eternity

Yes
I'm lost in my head
It's not that hard really
With the labyrinth in my brain
A left turn sends me to disaster
Go to the right and I find insanity
Around the bend I just might find
That happiness I lost four years ago
I'm going in circles
But I don't regret getting lost.
If I'd never strayed from the straight path,
I would never have understood
The beauty and horrors of life
I would never have known risk
I would not know what it's like
To be alive.

Tick tock
        Tick tock
                 Tick tock

It's already 5am
And here I am
Wide awake

As thoughts run
Through my head
Like a bullet train

Am I relapsing again?
Or I'm just on the edge
Waiting for a helping hand?

Or maybe I'm letting it be
For I've missed
Insanity to seep inside of me

Seeing that I am able to write
Shows clearly that
Hypomania has arrived.

Welcome back,
                 My frenemy.

"'Mom, I'm tired.."
I said, as I walked slowly towards her
My arms weighing me down
Hanging by my sides, T-shirt no sweater

"Go take a nap sweetheart"
She replied in a sweet, soothing tone
Wish I had said something more
Cause where I'm going, there isn't a phone..

I've withered and got down to my goal
It's a shame more people didn't realize,
No one took it serious enough
I never felt like I was the right size

I couldn't feel anymore neither happiness nor pain
If this is what it took then I'm glad the job is done
I loved you all so much so please forgive me
But I think this nap will be my last one

I recently agreed to leave my body to science
In return for free cremation & disposal services.
But I insisted on one small qualifier,
A precise stipulation that
The first-year medical student, to which
My cadaver is assigned,
Be female & lovely,
Brilliant & curious,
Fevered & insane,
Seeking a miracle cure for broken hearts.
The damaged among us,
Yearn for a magic elixir,
Some long lost potion,
Arcane & miraculous,
Insightful & perfect in simplicity.
A man who truly loved women,
My last woman dissects me,
I, a species of man she would master.
Cuts out my heart and weighs it,
Divines my psychology from slice of spleen.
Or liver, toxic, cirrhotic,
Surely, random entrails hold some key to me.
I--in all my incandescent incongruity--
Must render up some gender-specific clue,
As to what it is men really want;
Proving, again, the simplest answer is best.