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Bluedyedroses Jun 2015
Just go, you clearly don't know what you want from me
Just leave, no words or thoughts like it's so ******* easy
Just now I thought something could finally happen
Just stupid old me for giving in after a bottle of Kracken..

Now I can't, I don't know who you are
Now I want and miss how you could take me so far
Now  I just feel empty and so ******* alone
Now I sit and wonder why you couldn't just pick up your phone..
Bluedyedroses May 2015
You can smell the alcohol off my breath
The burn is soothing,
This life leading to an unforgettable death
The beat of the drum gets me moving,
Going around the clock on **** and cigarettes
Waiting for a surprise,
"What did I do with my phone?" She forgets,
What will tonight bring? Will she have to tell more lies?
Stale smoke never lingers
Because she clears the bowl,
Hoping for the rush to flow to her fingers
Way up in the sky on could9, ten bucks is the gateway tole
Bluedyedroses May 2015
The dust collecting on the window sill,
Makes me think of time
The days and hours accumulating,
It was the most dangerous crime

I had you warned but you didn't stray,
So I can't be put at fault
Starting to become someone else,
Routine every day like some type of cult

Like a sunset everything must end,
Even though we adore the mystical beauty
Sitting here lost in my words and actions,
While you were lost paying Call Of Duty

More days passed with nothing but anger,
Your fists showed exactly how you felt
Even if they weren't directed at me,
I had to pick up the cards after they were dealt

So many tears, shouting, and lies
But you always got your fill
Anything you needed I was right there
Well...not anymore, because I dusted my window sill.
Bluedyedroses May 2015
"'Mom, I'm tired.."
I said, as I walked slowly towards her
My arms weighing me down
Hanging by my sides, T-shirt no sweater

"Go take a nap sweetheart"
She replied in a sweet, soothing tone
Wish I had said something more
Cause where I'm going, there isn't a phone..

I've withered and got down to my goal
It's a shame more people didn't realize,
No one took it serious enough
I never felt like I was the right size

I couldn't feel anymore neither happiness nor pain
If this is what it took then I'm glad the job is done
I loved you all so much so please forgive me
But I think this nap will be my last one
If my illness takes me before I'm ready to go, at least someone somewhere out there will know
Bluedyedroses May 2015
Put me to sleep

Let my
thoughts rest.

   I'm getting to the
of no return

My demons are
put to the test.

I need to get  
of the world

Even for a
before sunrise,

   A breath of  
in the air

    But it's  just a dream.. Wow

What a surprise.
Bluedyedroses May 2015
And she said to him
Fate, is not what we were
Or what we have become
It is where we are going

He looked down at his shoes
Shifted his weight
Looked up at her longingly
And his eyes were saddened

He asked where she was going
She couldn't say
Because of the answer
And what he wanted to hear

Both were completely different
Bluedyedroses May 2015
It drives me ******* crazy
When I don't know what to say
More so even
When you look at me that way

How my mind aches
When I don't know what you're thinking
All I ask for is a word of release
To keep me from all this sinking

Black hole, quicksand, however you put it
There's no limit to the tracks that my mind can run
Every second of every minute

Say something! Do something!
I'm just idly standing
Then there it is again, that look
And I'm not reprimanding
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