His hands fit mine
As though they were made to
His heart pounds rhythmically
Making it my favorite song

His voice is a calming melody
Opening my eyes to see
Everything that we could be

His laughter heals me
As though he is medicine
His aching kills me
Bringing me to my knees

His words are a smooth chatter
Saving me right after
It seems my world has shattered

His feet I trust to guide me
When my eyes can't see
His arms always heat me
While everyone else is freezing

His eyes go wandering
Over my hands he is holding
Showing he'll always be loving

Blank pages, stained sheets
More than one missing piece

Dull thoughts and new places
Silencing screams as she paces

No words, don’t speak
Never to disturb the peace

Doll, you're like that one day in Autumn

When the sun shines just right
It's not dull, but not too bright

When the clouds barely dot the sky
And the wind blows like a subtle sigh


Dear, you're a tall glass of sparkling water

That drink of water that seems just right
That cools you down and makes you feel alright

That water you need when the day's been hot
And that drink of icy cold just hits the spot


*Thank You.

I've spent countless hours
Searching for myself in bottles
And scraping the bottom
Hoping that I may be found there

I've spent countless hours
Searching for myself in medication
And swallowing the hardest of pills
Seeking refuge in the numbness

I've spent countless hours
Searching for myself in people
And cleaning myself after the lust
Just feeling more lost than before

I've spent countless hours
Talking others down from suicide
And hating every reassuring word
That comes out of my lying mouth

I've spent countless hours
Staring at myself in the mirror
And working on my smiles and laughs
So that they seem real and authentic

And I've spent countless hours
Regretting all these hours wasted

When we began
It was beautiful

We'd stay up for hours
Just talking about nothing

We'd agree on everything
Even the bad things

We'd make out Like
It would **** us to stop

The people we were
Were perfect together

..........................

But you're not that you
And I'm not that Me

The people we are now
Just aren't meant to be

That's what happens
Love does that

I felt my heart begin to pound
Your voice had that familiar sound..

I saw you slowly walk up those stairs
I knew I was right to be so scared..

The way you looked at me..
I could barely breathe..

The air was heavy with doubt
Who knew silence could be so loud?

Loving you was always so hard..
..I guess..
*"We're better apart."

What is, for you,
A raindrop
In a puddle

Is, for me,
A hurricane
Over the ocean

What is, for you,
A crack
In the pavement

Is, for me,
The beginning
Of an earthquake

What is, for you,
A simple,
Minute step

Is, for me,
A monumental,
Colossal devotion

You know I hate it-
Try as I might,
It seems useless-
A losing fight...

..to erase you from my thoughts
I need guidance - an emotional GPS
I'm hopelessly, tragically lost..

Pale - you numb me like snow
You're colder than the ice that used to sit in my soul
Frail - this must be sick with a cold
I think I see the devil, dear;
I thought you should know

And, as much as I hate it,
Try as  I might;
I can see it's useless-
A losing fight..

..letting go while holding on to Jack Frost
Lasts a lifetime and I need rest
This has all come at too high a cost..

Blame - neglect may be all that I know
Flaunt your fears; they make for a show
Creep - such a dreadful process must be slow
To find trophies in the scar tissue;
From the wounds, marvels may grow..

Still, I hate it-
Try as I might;
It's always been useless-
A losing fight..

..because you keep a place in my mind
And keep my chest filled with ice
Even after all this **** time..

At this moment
I am telling you that I love you
I love everything about you
Your hair
Your lips
Your voice
Your skin
Your taste
I choose to keep you forever
Out of every human being on this planet
I Choose You

The me that was lucky enough to wake up next to you
Was the happiest me that I ever knew

The me that got to listen to your melodic voice
I'd go back to being if I had the choice

The me that was blessed enough to hold your hand in mine
Should have known it would only last a short time

Till death do us part
Even if I tear you apart
Or burn up your heart

In sickness and in health
Neither pain nor wealth
Will save you from my hell

So say it.
"I do."

If I'm an angel
Strip me of my wings
My halo
And my grace

And fling me down to Hell
Where I will
Rightfully
Take my place

I hate people.
They anger me.
They're ridiculous.
It irritates me.

I hate people.
They frustrate me.
They're so stupid.
It upsets me.

I hate people.

Your words used to hurt me
But now you've lost power

There's only one way to break me
But I'm afraid you've found it

There's not much I can do
But I'm going to try

It may take some work
I may sell my soul

But I'm going to defeat you tonight
And leave your body where it lies

Trading my eternity for a little help
Watch in awe as my power swells

And I call upon the tainted forces
Of all the demons that dwell within my flesh

Allow them to manifest
Put you to rest

HOW DARE YOU STRIKE ME
COME AGAINST ME

NOW YOU MAY TASTE THE STING
OF A FORCE SO TORTURING

I'll rip apart your flesh
Feed on the pain

Revel in your suffering
And laugh at your screams

I'll video tape it and
Watch it later

Drink your blood and
Call it liquor

Soak in your utter shock
That it's evil that is my center

Embracing the burn
That comes with the flames

Might as well get used to it
It's my destination

But you'll be there too
You horrible *****

You're too stupid to realize
That we never believed you

We, of all people, knew you
Lies were never really accepted

Your days of terrorizing us are over
Now go ahead and scream and cry

Catch ya later then
I'll See You In Hell

I know I write about you
And my love for you
All the time
But, the truth is, I'm afraid
So very scared

Because I've been
Down this road before
And it ended
Quite gruesomely
Quite abruptly

So every time that I say it
Know that I mean it
I truly love you
But my words
Will always be tinged with fear

Though everything within me
Adores everything about you
I will always dwell in anticipation
Forever on the edge of my seat
For fear of losing you

I've given a lot
And so have you
Though I'm sure you more than I
This love is all that I need
And so I'm very very afraid

I'm in love with you
I need you to know
I never wanted to let you go

i miss the words you'd say
i miss being together everyday

i miss the stupid jokes
i miss the way you'd walk

i miss the way you'd talk
i miss the way you'd hold me

i miss the loving things you'd do
i miss the cute texts you'd send me

but above everything else
i miss myself

i miss the trust i used to have
i miss the way i loved

i miss the joy that used to reside
inside my untainted heart

i miss my openness
i miss all those tears that i shed

i miss the way i was
before you made me love you

The sentence of life
Like a tide of crimson
Washing over me
Rinsing me of mortal holds
Raining down urgently

Breaths of sensitive souls
Wishes growing old
Like the ashes of the scrolls
Of time that told
Our heart-wrenching story

The bends, the folds
Of the dance that
So tightly bound us
To one another
In undeniable splendor

Like two star-crossed lovers
We lie in waiting
In the middle of the bustling street
Death, we plan to tempt
Our bond, it has no end

Embracing harmonized anomalies quite chaotically

Blindly, musically, inevitably inclined to monstrosities

Naturally-inherited higher probabilities of wild possibilities

It goes without saying- we're immune to the contagious monotony

I fell in love
I fell for you
You had walls
I tried to break through
I'd give you my all
I told you the truth
But in the end
It wasn't enough for you

Words unspoken..
Torn emotions..
I'd run away with you..

But you've chosen..
You've spoken..
I'm not enough for you..

I lost it all
I fall apart
You'll never call
I've sold my own heart
Denied my eyes
Saw a work of art
Now in the end
Shouldn't have let it start

Words unspoken..
Torn emotions..
I broke my walls for you..

But you've chosen..
Yes, you've spoken..
And I'm not enough for you..

I'm sorry
If I've ever hurt you

I've never been gentle

I'm sorry
If I've ever mistreated you

I've never been too nice

I'm sorry
If I've ever degraded you

I've never been understanding

I'm sorry
If I've never made you happy

I've always tried

I'm sorry
If I've never measured up

I've always attempted to

I'm sorry
If I've never been good enough

I've always been a failure

When the nights wind down
I wanna **** myself

I hate it
Because the harder I try
I can’t feel myself

Sittin and sippin
Steadily losing his interest

And I wanna die
But that’s none of his business

You can’t tell them you’re falling
Just to hear your name
In their whispers

Suffer in silence
Just like I do, myself

Self-inflict
Heavy violence
Just like I do, myself

In rolls the cigarette smoke
Breathe it in, exhale and I choke
Take it all down, thought before I spoke
Like Marilyn, I took a pill and I broke
Stifle a sigh, In it comes so out with the hope
They say it's a problem, but the issues not dope
Issues the papers, the rules are the joke
Words on a page, they let rage dictate
Everthing they do, free will it ain't
Rules, regulations, speak out get court dates
But this is America, land of the free
I guess we're all free, unless it comes to you and me
Home of the brave, but the monkeys have no keys
Fight for us, then place your sheets in the streets
U.S.A leave it to us to ruin the glory
Superpower, lost power, no power
Happy hour turns into 5 hours
Of choking, smoking, joking
Regretting it in the morning
Songs about ***, drugs, and love
Just say no! To all of the above
You'll bleed when they leave
Cuz to them it's just "me, me, me"

I only have as much energy

As these flames will allow me

And soon all that shall remain

Will be dull ashes in my place