What am I but a soul,
Imprisoned by a shell of flesh,
With organs feasting on my fluids,
Operated solely by a wrinkled beast
At the top of the meat tower.

Have I a choice? Or am I bound
To this wrinkled beast’s desire,
Praying for the day that
The light will come calling
And the beast will die.

I am split down the seams
As I stomp through the battlefield
Of judgement and authenticity;
Looking for the place
Where it’s okay,
To love who I want,
And live unafraid.

Weeks spent battling inside,
Fumbling with words,
Looking for the right tone,
So you knew that you hurt
My soul, and the soul
Doesn’t recover so easily.

We sat down on the loveseat,
Pressed into the armrests,
And I found the right time
To speak my truth.
You listened with ears
On edge, ready to argue,
Never conceding an inch
So you could win.
And you won
Because you know
I won’t fight.

You walked away
with shoulders held high,
And a crooked smile on your face,
While I’m left alone to
Bottle everything up,
So it never comes out again.

The world will move on
When your day comes.
The wind will still blow,
The moon will still shine,
And your tiny footprints
Will be wiped away with ease.

When that wind blows next,
And you feel the warmth of moonlight
on your skin,
Realize, you still have a chance
To soak it in.

Lights off, blankets tucked,
The last person goes under.
This old house stands still,
Holding its position
Against frozen wind,
While the blank sheet of snow
Mutes the sounds
Of a whole world on hiatus.

One last sip of water from the sink,
Letting the tap run
until it freezes your lips,
And you glide on the hardwood
Back to your space.

In your chair, the one place
You wanted to be.
But the only thing
That you can feel,
Is the pull of the abyss
And call of the unknown.

Candy cane dust
on the rim of my cup.
Burning sweetness
a burst of holiday.
When I finish
and lick the rim clean,
back home, where
no decorations hang,
no tree stands tall,
no family awaits my return.
My only present,
the candy cane dust
left on my tongue

Two days gone
Pushing forward into the darkness.
Felt like minutes
But, in those minutes, I’m supposed to live  
Enough for a lifetime.