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Amanda Kay Burke May 2020
I am sorry for my failures
Sorry for being depressed
Always being self-absorbed
Worried and constantly stressed

I am sorry I don't show gratitude
Sorry for causing you grief
Bearing sorrow as a weapon
Sword I cannot sheath

I am sorry I whine so much
Unload troubles on your ears
Sorry I'm uncomfortable
Showing others my tears

Sorry for getting on nerves
Clinging to your side so tight
I am sorry when we argue
Hard to admit you're right

I am sorry I'm perpetually sad
Emotions are beyond my control
Sorry you are the one left to repair
Damaged fragments of my soul

I am sorry I have changed so drastically
In years since we first met
Sorry for slipping downwards
Doing all that I regret

Sorry you often take care of me
I can't do it myself
Ignoring many problems
Instead of getting help

I am sorry I'm the way I am
For what I cannot be
Becoming who I swore I wouldn't
Sorry you're stuck loving me
A formal apology to my love
Amanda Kay Burke May 2020
They say "You gotta pay to play"    
Finding that's too true
******* ten ways from Sunday
No clue what I should do

Learning I can't maintain
I WAS in control
Overestimated brain
Habit swallowing me whole

Panic stricken voice
Gait leading to and fro
Haunted by one foolish choice
This agony I owe

I made the bed I am lying in
It's time to say goodnight
Afraid of darkness growing within
Bring myself to turn out the light

Cause and effect
It is simple and plain
Repeat the  same mistake once more
Is it really a mistake
If already made before?
You can't make the same mistake twice. The second time you make it it's no longer a mistake.
Amanda Kay Burke May 2020
Why must I feel the way I feel?
Want to wake up but this nightmare is real
Too many mazes clouding my brain
Swirling in circles driving insane  
Poor judgement leading emotions down hazardous roads
Lugging regrets like oversized loads
I worry
Stress over nothing at all
Convince feet I'm destined to fall
Tripping over thoughts I create
Actual obstacles don't get in the way
Self-sabotaging before having a chance to fail
Sink the boat BEFORE setting sail
It is better to know you're a loser than be unaware
Best get used to being alone because others won't be there
I'm a loser baby so why dont you **** me
Amanda Kay Burke May 2020
Enjoy every minute you are alive
Bad as well as the good
Bits of happiness wait to be mined
That make life as it should

They said happiness cannot be bought
Please believe that's correct
Leave me peace and thought
To quietly reflect

Another day
Little things
Say "thank you" and "please"
Feel so up and down like swings
Alone with memories

I say be thankful for all
That is fine if you don't agree
Value each moment
No matter how small
They all hold importance to me
Be thankful every single minute
Amanda Kay Burke May 2020
Never be afraid
Let go
Reinvent yourself how you'd like to show
A fresh new image of own design
Reborn person fantastic and fine
Always encourage creativity
Give it acres of room to romp and run free
Be mentor to the self within
Guide to the surface of your skin
Teach to be confident and comfortable
Take care to be cautious and stay out of trouble
Always reach for stars shining bright
Charge ahead bravely with all your might
Something a bit different than my usual
Amanda Kay Burke May 2020
Why am I still sad?
Blessed with reasons to be glad
Always feeling bad
I'm so sad
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