Sitting still
While the moment passes
Nothing is lost
As time collapses
Into unity

For what it’s worth
The accidental poet, Leo
Finds catharsis in
Composing in
The poetic form

His words are private
Musings of a distressed mind
And yet he is happy
To share his verse
So you may also
Find your truth

In the joy of love
I will find you
The precise moment
Does not matter
For we have always been
And always will be
One

This is a Poem
   It is quite a thing
Wandering amongst the lilies
   Pondering life's sting

Rough and tumble
The ways of the world
Keep me aware
That I am not here
To simply exist

The struggle is integral
I need to keep going
Continue growing
Finding my way to
Existing simply

Seriously sad
Trapped in a moment
Set upon a barren table
Nothing to see for miles

Nothing to do
But go deeper
Sometimes the only way out
Is through

Baby steps
One at a time
Moving forward
Building slowly
Moving deftly
I am unstoppable

Letting go of attachment
I awake to a deeper truth
I am just the instrument
I pray I am played well today

As roadblocks present
   I find I must adapt
Dissolve myself
   to flow like water
Choosing to shape
   my destiny

The stark joy
Of life in all its glory
Is here
Right in front of me

Why am I afraid to
Engage
What part of my suffering
Keeps me safe

Moments like these
When my mind opens
Ideas range free
Anything goes
Everything is possible

Casting off the anchors of my past
I let the wind take me
   whither it will
Me at the bow
Eager to discover new lands

Being rescued
At the eleventh hour
Is not for
The faint of heart

Looking doom
Straight in the eye
Knowing I could be taken down
At any moment

Letting go
And holding on
All in the same moment
Getting to rock bottom

This is my journey
How I get to my truth
For only through
The heat of the forge
Am I made whole

Ripples
Radiating out
All the way to the edge

A beacon
Broadcasting a message
To all and sundry

Pure or disrupted
The message remains the same
One message for all

Find your truth
The truth of Deep Knowing
But know
It is only
Your truth

It’s still there
The void inside
Dark and cavernous
Ready to draw me down

I thought I had dealt with this
But I just papered it over
Trying to be normal
Trying to survive

It doesn’t take much
To bust it open
To send me running
Looking to hide

There seems no end
To the grief I hold
It carries me with it
Lost and out of control

It’s not your fault
It was there before
Wounds from my past
Which have emptied me out

It’s time to face it
Go deep and howl
Let the sorrows out
Let the torrents flow

Surrendering thus
The endless waters calm
And in this moment
The light of love shines through

Cold and wintery the light
Penetrates my heart
I smile as I realize
I will always love you

I am beginning to understand
I was formed whole
Nothing was left out
Nothing to be sent along later

So then what am waiting for
To start my life
Why do I play so small
In this garden of abundance

The walls of my fears
It seems are illusions
Fabrications I cling to
Protecting me from an imaginary abyss

How to tear these walls down
And emerge from this prison
From the sad aloneness
Into joy and connection

As I wrestle with the paradox
Of embracing my magnificence
While remaining humble
I remind myself
I am but the empty vessel
Ready to be filled
With the splendor of the divine

in the first place
there is I
the I is am
and it is all

in the second place
there is heart
bringing shape texture
and context to being

in the third place
there is mind
spinning story creating want
and now there is never enough

The empty cup
That held such promise
Gently mocks me
From the nightstand

It says:
You thought you were everything
And now you know you are nothing
Embrace the emptiness
For it is the only thing that is true

Opening my heart
To embrace my full potential

I see a future of
     abundance
          connection
               and joy

In a gentle world of
     giving
          and trust

Completing us all

When life presents in adversity
I know this is how
I transcend my past
It is a blessing
Evidence I am progressing
On my journey
To become human

subtle moments
   gently forming
kernels of joy
effervescence
   awakening
   tickling
bringing me
   into the now

A flowering of consciousness
Which direction will it grow
How many blossoms
Capturing the light
Sharing the beauty
For all to see

The sands of time
flowing backward
set in motion
so long ago

Grasping at the past
groping in the dark
looking for meaning
to justify existence

The ground I stand on
slipping away
as reality dissolves
I choose to move

Reckless and raucous
I hear the sounds
the gathering is calling
the time is now

The wind at my back
Moving forward
   seems effortless
Each moment
   one breath at a time

Moving from glow to flow
   my purpose now clear
I embrace the lapping surf
   the slow decay
Of things past their usefulness

knowing Entropy
   Has a partner
equal and opposite
   Creating stars and galaxies
planets and oceans
   The seed of Life
within us all
   Gently glowing

Being in this place
Between past and future
I let it expand
To greet who l am

Am I loved?
Do I matter?

Do others love me?
How long will they care?

Is it enough to just love myself?
Can I too end that loving?

No
It is primary
And can never be taken away

For I am love

Where has
     my light
           gone?

Wait
     it's right here
I just had to
     open my eyes

The carnage in my wake
The cascading consequences

I look for catharsis in the trauma

Hoping to make peace
   with the past
Probing for purpose
   in each moment
Seeking out
   soothing music
   for the troubled soul

I try to let go
   of the judgments
And surrender
   to the now

Set in ink
My thoughts seem silly
Childish arguments
For bad behavior

The truth lies deeper
It evades capture
And will not be trapped
In the form of words

All abuzz and aglow
i grasp at a future
knowing it is better
   to let go

a pause
a reset
finding space to be
connecting to
   the essence of me

Finding the space
To create abundance
I resist the temptation
To keep it for myself

In the belief
A shared blessing
Is a blessing multiplied
I pay it forward

Caught in a trap
Between thoughts and feelings
Finding both false

How to find the truth
The space beyond self-justification
To be at peace

Can I surrender my power
Can I become vulnerable and open
Fears arise and the dance begins again

Present to the paradox  
Of a thousand conflicting truths
I inhale with a smile

Notwithstanding
The pain I have gone through
I still have favorable
Thoughts of you

I wonder where you are
And how life is treating you
The “what ifs” bubble up
And cloud my view

I try to let go
Saying “it wasn’t meant to be”
Yet my love persists
Even though I told you you were free

I stand next to a leaf
A simple manifestation
Billions of years
Trial and error
Evolution outcompeting entropy
The promise of a future
When I open my eyes
I can see

With memories
We create stories
   the framework of our lives

All too often
   these frameworks
Become solid walls
Blocking out the light

Clarity at the edges
But blind in the middle
Myopically navigating
This treacherous terrain

Feeling put upon
And put off
The mind wanders
Lost in fog

Until at last
I yell STOP
Breathing in my essence
To be who I am

Nested in a select place
Feeling secure
Enjoying this moment

Letting the calm
Wash away the emotions
Shedding the past
Like an unneeded skin

Emerging
Clean and fresh
Into a new day

Clinging to memories of joy
As if they define me
Leaving me blind to
Each joyous moment since

Falling folds rest gently on the floor
Tiny portals show only congestion
Straight lines weave curve and intersect
All around chaos abounds

Charting my way through to the end of each day
Is a challenge that takes all of me
Stopping to breathe in the beauty
Seems like an irresponsible luxury

And yet why am I here?
Is it only to take care of the mundane?
Or is it the beauty which creates the meaning I crave?
I look again at the falling folds

trapped by illusion
the borders immutable
back and forth
without escape

if only i could see
the bigger picture
the border but a frame
to hold the illusion

change my frame of reference
and i am free

Lifted by divine love
I now know
I am whole
Joy and abundance
Are my destiny

Water
   alive with nature's power
Nourishing
Delighting
Creating boundary

With a simple act
Washing the world clean

The simple things
Abound with joy
My truth lies there
Bringing me back
To who I am

A breath
A moment
This moment
Present to the whole universe

It is all here
Right now
Nothing to do
But be in the joy of it all

Plugging away
Searching for
   that which counts
Expanding my consciousness
Step by step
To fill the vacuum
   of my potential

Trust is rare
In this world of trauma
Expediency valued
Above all else

Everything becomes story
A woven tapestry
Meant to deceive
Meant to divide

This must end
One way or another
In transcendence
Or annihilation

How many among us
Will be left to witness
The new age
The age of trust

on the open sea
having slipped the moorings
a long time ago
waves and clouds
the only horizon

adrift
   alone
is a safe harbor even real anymore
   or is the only future
waves and Storms