Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
C J Baxter Nov 2014
I have a gun,
I keep it under my bed
and just for fun
I decided not to tell anyone

But it weighs heavy

Now when people
get under my skin I don’t begin
to unwind and
let my patience wear thin

I just think of my gun under my bed.
I think of a hole going straight through my head.

My Heads just a borrowed mess,
I’m just a high liar, dire trier
trying too much again.  
You see friends
in strangers but behaviours
vary, yes its very scary times indeed.

I took my gun
out for a walk or maybe he
took me for one
when the sky showed sun.

And it weighs heavy
ink Nov 2014
I say hello
My nametag dangles from my lanyard
"Hello, my name is Liz
Pronouns are kye/kyr"
it says

They see the lanyard
and they laugh.
"Those aren't pronouns!"
they say
"She is messed up."

Shut up.

A 300lb woman
looks into the mirror
she sighs
remembering her peers' words
"You should lose weight."
"You're very overweight."
"Your obeseity is your fault."

A 75lb woman
looks into the mirror
Her anorexia laughs
remembering the 300lb woman she used to be
her peers then tell her
"You need to gain weight."

Shut up. Shut up.

The boy hides his face
Not giving the teacher eye contact
The teacher calls his name
His stomach flips upside-down
She called on him on purpose
he just knows it

In front of the class
expectant, judgemental eyes glaring
Instinct tells him to run
He looks at his notecards
All he sees is chickenscratch
The teacher hangs her head in disappointment
and growls
"Just sit down if you have nothing to say."

Shut up. Shut up. Shut up.

A girl drags hersef through the day
Everything is black and white
Coming home to wild parents
Who hit her constanty
and then claim
"I love you."

Excuses, excuses.
For every welt, mark and bruise
But when she gets one on her face-
She had given one, too.
In fact, she had given many
How generous she was!
The police came and arrest the girl.
All she heard was
"Her mother is dead."

Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up.

Take a breath
the girl tells herself
She goes to her parents
They stare, wide-eyed
at her dress, eyeliner and nails
they just stare.

She tells them
her new identity
They tell her
"Chris. You aren't a girl.
You're a boy."

Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up.

You read a poem
titled "Shut Up"
About the hardships
The unfair, the despair
of living life.

Please know
Opinions don't matter
If you are happy,
who cares what they think?
If they criticize you
Just smile
and say

Shut up.
You are valid.
Please do not let anyone tell you otherwise.

You'll be okay.
Never tall enough.
Weight too low.
Brown eyes brown hair.
No blue or green.
No blonde or red.
Face of a child.
Pixie hair as thin as air.
Of legal age mistaken for a sweet sixteen.
Of female gender thought to be a young boy.
Cup size sorry didn't make the C.
Jeans don't go past 0.
"You don't know what it's like to be overweight, you don't what it's like to be judged for not looking perfect."
But I do.
"My God you are so small."
"Cute like a child."
"Excuse the interruption would you like a children's menu?"
"Don't lie how old are you really?"
"Look at your tiny arms!"
"I can wrap my arms around you twice!"
"Men like curvy women"
A daily struggle due to image.
Never looking perfect in people's eyes. Always the little one the ugly one of the group.
Never to be seen as anything more.
Eating too much provocking sickness upon myself simply to gain a pound or two.
Never succeeding.
Simply to make myself a perfect image accepted by society.

Kathia Mariana Landeros
My biggest insecurity
elizabeth Nov 2014
It feels as though
There is a tightrope beneath my feet
A blindfold surrounds my eyes
And in my heart, a heavy beat

I am not sure how long I have been walking
Or how much farther I have to go
Nor if I fall,
How many lifetimes it would take,
To hit whatever's down below

There are days I feel like wings
Have sprouted from my back
And I feel like I am light as air
Running swiftly down this track

Sometimes I feel like falling
Just to see what's underneath
That maybe on the ground are your arms calling
I haven't the faith to take the leap

Most of the time, however,
I am trying too hard not to shake,
My balance is the victim here
When my time, I choose to take

This tightrope I've been walking
Has been braided so carefully
By all the words I ever think
And let out
So carelessly

Perhaps I am too heavy
To walk a rope as thin as this,
Weighed down by burden, lies, and stress,
One wrong step,
Would I be missed?
Ember Evanescent Oct 2014
Today I'm going to stop
This ridiculous destructive thing
I've been doing it to myself
For five. miserable. years.
I talk so much about
How I hate to be controlled
but this is controlling me
I'm wasting my life
and this is my fresh start
I don't want to paint over
the same old canvas
I've already painted black
I've gone down this road before
and I could have been a killer
I don't want to be her anymore
The girl no one could help
and just watched her waste away before them
I'm no longer going to count the numbers
and measure and weigh
and cry and hate
I'M DONE
it can't control me anymore
she told me she was worried about me
now I know it's too far
what do I care anyway about all this?
It won't be very easy
but I'm not going to do this to myself anymore
I'm taking this canvas and BURNING IT
I'm starting fresh
I'm done with this
I'm finished
I need to be strong enough
for her
I won't become a statistic
under the earth in a wooden box
with only a block of cement
to prove I ever existed
because pretty doesn't have a size
and for her
I'm going to stop
Five years
is long enough
Avery Greensmith Oct 2014
don't sell your soul to him because
he'll turn around and let go of it the
first chance he gets, and it'll
be 3 am and your skin is ripping off
your heart and your bones are
crunching but you can't change
anything.

it's too ******* late,
because he's stolen your
innocence when he stole your
soul and you'll never be the same
again, no matter how hard you try.

i hope one day you realize
that he doesn't define you,
that when he grabbed at your pants
he didn't take away your
worth.

and no matter what happened,
no matter how many times you invited him
back to watch a movie, or go for a walk,
it was never your fault,
IT WAS ALWAYS HIS FAULT AND
YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE TO
CARRY THE WEIGHT ON YOUR
SHOULDER LIKE YOU'RE ATLAS
HOLDING UP EVERY SINGLE BIT
OF THE WORLD, BUT YOU DO
AND I'M SO SORRY THAT YOU HAVE TO.

IF I COULD I WOULD CARRY ALL OF
YOUR WEIGHT AND MORE, JUST
SO YOU COULD BE FREE, BUT
THE WORLD ISN'T LETTING ME
AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO.

JUST REMEMBER THAT HE IS NOTHING
COMPARED TO YOU, BECAUSE YOU
ARE THE SUN AND HE ISN'T EVEN A SPECK
OF DUST FLOATING IN THE MIDDLE
OF THE OCEAN.
Michael McLean Oct 2014
I try to lift weights

I guess I don't

pulling not-so-heavy

badly-shaped maybe-steel

from clay ground to beating chest

back and forth

atop a New York skyscraper
punk rock hippy Sep 2014
To lose what I've gained would be such a wonderful thing.
Losing is winning
Next page