It's beginning to feel like this house is haunted
For you are turning into an unfriendly ghost
I've tried to give you everything you've said you wanted
Hoping that it would pay off when I may need you the most

Yet I think back to all those times when we were kissing
For I love how it felt like I could touch your soul
But now when I look at you it's like your soul went missing
Forcing me to see that I've failed to play my expected role

For it's about that time of year
Where every home seems to be filled with love
While ours seems to be filled with my fear
That you want to fly free like a ghostly dove

Because it seems like our house is haunted
As I realize that your soul's silence was never a joke
For now you tell me that I was never the one you wanted
And I feel devastated by the words of which you just spoke

Oh my love it's now clear that you are a ghost
For I thought that I had your heart in spite of it never being there
And now I am a soldier who stands at her post
To keep my heart from shouting things like, "How could you not care?"

Or from screaming, "How could you have kept this hidden?"
When you made me think you loved me so I gave you my everything
Oh yes believe me now when I say that any thought of you is forbidden
After I gave you everything and you leave me with absolutely nothing

For how dare you make me feel unwanted
When I worked hard to do the things you say you like
Maybe all ghosts like you have a special way to make a house seem haunted
Oh I hope God forgives me for telling you to take a hike

Because Lord knows that there have been too many nights
Where I prayed that your soul would come out and say boo
But this haunted house just like this love has no hope nor lights
After all the pain we have put each other through

Which leads us to now where I let you know
That it's better we both look for someone new
I'm forcing my heart to completely let you go
Because your absence now gives me reason to

I feel like i'm toxic to the touch
when I felt and tried to return the love you gave me,

turning not to thank me,
as I reach out to grab you,

you walked away,
as I watched and cried,

I retrace each step you take,
my tears falling so fast they fill your footprints place,

drawing what ever may live in your souls,
as you stepped and went away,

eventually the night falls,
and I am left in the darkness, alone,

without you,
without anyone to care,

I sit unwanted,
hoping you will care.

Never before have I felt this way
Never before have I been afraid of what I have to say
Unstable and easy to sway
I was always the huntress now I'm the prey
Falling asleep to tears at the end of the day

I have never felt unwanted
Used to flying now I'm stunted
Always accepted and now shunted
Only temporarily hunted
Then tossed aside and bunted

Swallowed by the fear
Feeling alone without you near
It's a sour wine the final tear
Standing at the end of the line holding up the rear
Watching her win with her evil leer

Struggling to get to the top
So full of goodness and ready to pop
You have no idea what you let drop

He walks up to her
Cute and calm
In her boots of fur
He walks up to her

With a smile he says hi
Cute and calm
She turns to look him in the eye
And with a nod she says good bye

He sees another girl
Poised and pretty
Decides to give it a whirl
He sees another girl

He taps her on the shoulder
Poised and pretty
Could he be the one to hold her
She turns to scoff forever colder

As he sits and waits for the world to shift
He thinks oh yeah oh yeah I've got the gift
What I say and what I do it's all irrelevant
I was born to be the female repellant

I love her/him so much
It hurts
But the good kinda way
I'm at a loss of words

The pain keeps changing
From good to bad
When I realise
It was all in my head

Now that I'm left unwanted again
I'm left wondering out of boredom
If a person really needs to be wanted

Unappreciated
i do everything i can
for people that i love
yet they don't seem to notice
the extra miles i walk for them

Unwanted
they choose others over me
when I'd choose them over others
i am everyone's last choice
i am everyone's last resort

Unworthy
i deem myself unworthy of time
for one seems to give me theirs
it's sad how i give every second i have
to the people who won't give me a minute

They don't always
Look dull
Or restless
Some even laugh
Joke around
And get crazy
With you
Everyday
They always
Got your back
Smiling and
Cheering you on
Because
They know how it feels
To be loathed
Broken
Unwanted
And them hurting alone
Is enough


©Leigh Herondale  *October 2015