Are those parts of my folly?
Those words that I carve to end up with a poesy
I love my hobby in a way that it's kicky
In a sense that in this world, I am free

That a pauper can be a hero daily
For in reality, those events happen in paucity
But it's my wish that this occurrence will not be of perpetuity
For most of the poor possessed a heart of humbly

But really, of most battle poor can hardly get the victory
But it's always to them belongs my sympathy
That If only I got the key to end up their poverty
I will not think twice, simply I'll set them free...

Written: June 30, 2001 @ 8:12 am

Mysterious Aries

Demons with purity, Angels with Sin,
Benevolence truly shines from within.
Judge those who are not shrouded with darkness,
For they have experienced pain and emptiness.
Open your arms and share with them your light, and one day you may just end their fright.*

❥

The breath in my chest
Scraped against my esophagus
As the preacher read his
Introductory scripture and a
Mourning loved one doubled over
In grief and despair as she
Struggled to bid adieu;

The hairs on the back of my neck
Stood horizontally and
Perpendicular to my concrete floor
As I heard the sweetest soul I know
Choke on her sobs on the
Other end of the receiver,
As she struggled to understand
The onset of pain and finality
She was forced to swallow;

My stomach hollowed and
Acidic anger bubbled and carved out my insides
When I read my best friend's texts,
A series of words
That seemed too cruel to be true,
A riffraff of  interrogatories and
Unsettled punctuation,
Summarizing the momentary suspension
Of her resiliency
As she processed the
Breaking of her heart;

And now I lay motionless
On my mattress,
Hot tears masquerading behind my
Tightened eyelids as I writhe in
Empathy,
Alone in my incapability
To end the pains and the woes of
Those around me,
As my body thus must then grieve
For me.

Remember, when you said that you wanted to die?
Because of those countless accusations regarding your lies
I told you to stand up, live, just give it a try
But you still keep on asking me all your thousand whys
I'm speechless, unable to answer because of the thought I'm not wise
I punched my stomach, cause of anxiety, wanting to **** the butterflies
I still showed care towards you even my emotions were on disguise
You hugged me and whispered, "I'm HOPELESS" then you cried
I was there, I've swept the tears beneath your eyes
"I'm here for you and I will stand up for you" I replied
Slowly, our lips collide and they began to dramatize
This memory was just a proof that my efforts aren't denied
A precious moment of victory from suicide, because you SURVIVE!

Surrounded by apologies
weepy, weak, collapsing hugs
So young, so young, so young...

Sympathy gifts and tear-stained shirts
moldy fruit, cardboard pizza
Such a shame, poor girl, head hung.

Musty rooms and creaking floorboards
"If you ever need anything"
So strong, so strong, so strong...

Time's up, back to work, 9 -5
burnt lavender and broken wicks
Hope all is well, now move along.

Trapped thoughts, *** holes in my mind
seeking out salt water
At least you're here, now 23.

Hands on mouths and stifled gasps
"I can't imagine what you've been through"
My God, so glad that she's not me.

Everyone is high
On self pity and
Hate
Self diagnosed with
A terrible
Fate
No one knows
How to be sad
Without writing it off
As extraordinarily bad
Happiness isn't
A permanent gig
It's always there
If you bother to dig
Everyone is sad
Because the world is ****** up
And no one dares
To see the good stuff
A world of pessimism
Breeds angry babes
And they all start to believe
Theres no Other way
So load up on drugs
Get high in the rest
Because that's when the world
Looks its ******* best
No one was taught
How to smile
Despite the world
Looking dark for a while
So we all slit our wrists
And demand sympathy
From a world that never cared
If you were down on your knees

i threw my past at you,
thinking you'd understand,
because pain is relative, and
i knew you got that much

but whats been thrown at me,
be it punches, or knives, or
you and
your words

i guess i just put more
trust in the thought
that you'd think more like me and
you'd, for once, have sympathy.