Mind full of confusion
Color blind delusions
Am I wrong? Am I right?
Is this even worth the fight?

I don't know which way is up
I'm descending into hell
You think you own me but your wrong
You can try, but you will fail

You project self hatred
On anyone you can
Never took responsibility
And you call yourself a man?

You think you're God twisting reality
Manipulating all my memories
Yet you believe that you're the victim
You take what's right and make it wrong

I've caught on to your tricks
I've mastered all your little games
I'm much stronger than you now
You're the only one to blame

I'm coming to take back what's mine
Reclaim my thoughts and my mind
My soul will not be caged
You will never control me

I am not afraid of you anymore
Never again will I live in fear
You are dead to me now
And I hope that's very clear

I wonder if you threw away
That giant Mickey Mouse doll I bought you in Times Square,
Or the art I made for you-
That little wooden chair that I burned designs into, describing you
As a goddess.
I wonder if you sifted through your colorful room
And exorcised my presence, gathered every piece of jewelry and thoughtful little gift
I ever gave you.
I wonder if you tore up my poems.
But the thing is
If you did, it means that I mean something
And if you didn't
It means that I mean something.
If you erased me, I know that, just like you will never find and destroy EVERY gift I gave you over 3 years
You will never erase me from your soul.
And if you didn't, I know that part of you can't let go
Of being loved so deeply and so purely.
I planned for this, my lost love.
I planned for years.
I never really thought you'd stay.
I only thought to make myself
Unforgettable
And
I know I did.

I want to move on.
But how can I move on when I owe you so much?
Pain
Tears.
Sleepless nights.
Heartaches.
Time.
Wouldnt it be selfish of me to not give it back?
I owe you that, payback.

-InTheWorldOfCyn

Great blind men see all,
But you are no gifted prophet,
Your claims are hollowed out
Your visions are tenebrous and ignorant --
Stop acting like you know me,
Stealing days, months, years
Does not mean I am yours;
My wings are clipped, but I still fly
My voice is silent, but I still sing.
You avoid my eyes, yet
You do not own your wrongs,
These bruises that go unnoticed,
These scars that are invisible.
Stop ignoring me! I’m still here.
I’m still trying to heal what is hurt,
Bind wounds opened by your hands.
Blind man, with eyes that do not see me,
Thinks he has ascendancy over me.
Blind man, oh my dear Blind man,
I hope you fall in your chosen darkness.

I beg inside my soul to have you.
I don't love you.  
I want to feel passion, desire,  and the warmth of another body pressing against me
I could grab any man I wanted, but I want you.
I see your brown hair
let me run my fingers through, just once
Your eyes
soft earth
Your lips
pink lilacs
And all I want is your body
Which is very saddening.
To only want to use someone, then toss them aside like trash
How can you?
And still fall asleep at night without thinking about a face wet with tears
your fault
I simply want to do to you
What you have done
To All the women before me,

The same song as a trickery

I want you to fall in love with me
an instrument meets the music
I want you to hold me close and kiss me, as you share your fears and truths.
a melody plays softly
I want you to believe in love because of me
Think of me,  breathe me,  and miss me when we are not together
accelerato tempo

Until one day you meet me in a corner booth at our favorite restaurant, and I rip your heart to shreds

Look,  I never loved you. I lied.
I used you to get what I want.
You are a pathetic, self-serving dung heap that only thinks about himself. You wooed me, I pretended to like you, so I could dig under your thick facade of masculinity, and discover your sensitive side. I know what you are--man *****--and I enjoyed using you. You can lie to everyone, every woman from this point on, but ten years from now,  when you are married to wife number four and you are waiting for her to come home and she never does,  I want you to crawl into the bed you made and bawl like the whining,  sniveling baby you truly become at night when no one else is around you.  I hope 'lonely' presses you down so hard it hurts to breathe. And maybe then you might turn into a different man or at least your miniscule brain will have an inkling of true heartbreak. Doubtful though--I win.  You lose

Then I get up and walk away from you,  ignoring any pleas and ****** slurs.

*Caesura

she said: " there's no real peace in revenge. "
i could never hurt you like you hurt me.
i could never make the pain beautiful or seem like it is worth it either. 
 i love you.

A desolate desire, a rambunctious hope.
To see the burning fire within this zealous stroke,
With inflamed vessels of red to be seared,
The beat of a heart with a sound quite fickle.

Undecided fate, lack of concentration.
  In a mind of dissipation, despise the renunciations.
Piece together the puzzle of the human mind and rip apart to be in the mad man's confines.
  
Fortitude to bear, uninterrupted disaster.
  Tutor the wreck less with ambition, explain your own maddening rendition.
  Take back the flames of a stolen heart, hope it lasts before it starts.