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NOW LIFE’S GONNA BE DESPAIR
LIFE’S GONNA BE ****** AND FROZEN
LIFE’S GONNA NEVER BE HAPPY AGAIN
LIKE I HAD WHEN I WAS YOUNG

‘CAUSE I REGRET THE DECISION I’VE MADE
‘CAUSE I BROKE THE BRIDGES I BUILT
‘CAUSE I LEFT THE ONES I LOVED
WHICH DESTROYED MY FUTURE
AND STAINED MY BLOOD

I’M NOT THE ONE I WAS
OR I ASSUMED ME TO BE
I CAN’T LIVE HERE ANYMORE
I’M SO SURE AND I GUARANTEE

‘CAUSE IT’S IN MY ROOTS, IT’S IN MY VEINS
IT’S IN MY BLOOD, IT’S IN MY BRAIN
TO BE CARELESS, TO BE RECKLESS
TO DESTROY EVERYTHING, TO FINISH MYSELF  

AND SO, I MISS MY BEST FRIEND I HAD
I MISS MY CHILDHOOD I PLAYED
I MISS THE FLASHBACKS I ADORE
WHEN LIFE WAS A PARTY TO BE THROWN
BUT THAT ALL WAS TWO YEARS BEFORE
Sabika H Apr 12
Is there a feeling worse than regret?
Knowing you’ve done something against yourself and only you are to blame?
What’s more poisonous than being able to live and relive the events of the past?
Than being able to see the rippling effects your actions have?
I cannot imagine anything worse
Than to be stuck in my own body
Than to experience myself so intensely
Knowing what I did
Knowing who I hurt.
I cannot imagine anything more frustrating
Than making mistakes and then knowing
How I could have done better and
Realising the limits of my own cognition
And the stupidity of my own ego.

I ask myself why
But the question only drives me mad.
I spit at my own reflection and
Cower into a corner and long for
A few seconds of non-existence.
I am ugly,
Ugly in the soul,
Ugly in the bone,
And no
These mistakes are not normal.
How can I be my own victim and perpetrator so easily?
And then wake up with dread that I’m not necessarily safe for myself?
I am stuck.
I did know better
But I didn’t do any better,
So what the actual f*ck?!
Leo Balaban Mar 11
I’m an expert
at what I do.
Every drop
of my every being
is good at being me.

It’s my only choice.
every action I do
trapped in myself
in my choices
in my mistakes
in my beautiful mind
as most have

It’s what I was
always made to be.

Since it was written
in the stars
mostly deep in
cells of my blood
in the coded chains
in the atoms
that make up
the long depths
of my soul:

I am me and
I am ******* good at it.
Eric Feb 9
Let me support you , while you hang from the cliff edge .
                   Let me congratulate you on destroying
                                      every past thing said .
                      As if it meant nothing from the start .
                  Creating misery across life, like it was art .
                               Who knew you'd go that far .
                             But guess what , I'm still here .
                        How do you explain away the scars ?
                     Do your stories , only match the ones
                                 You deemed greater then us ?
                Do you give their life pain with the feelings of
                                                                      distrust?
                                            So why only me Love ?
Acina Joy Oct 2020
I'm glad I never met your face;
I'm glad  you're far from home;
I'm glad our meetings never came,
so I could cry in bed alone.

I'm glad our worlds were not the same;
I'm glad we  had our different zones;
Of time and space; of heart and mind—
of suffering—all which is my own.

For if we met, and found each other
Mapped every corner, bend, and contour,
I'd find I'd regret the day that I met you,
since seeing you would've hurt me more.
Sungmoo Bae Sep 2020
The two ol' pals are facing each other.

He passes a glass of poison
to his dear guest, leaning
near the front door, slightly opened;
and he's learning the reason—

why he's standing there,
about to storm out of the stone-cold apartment—
'bout to burst in tears
shedding the vivid droplets

that shouldn't be belonging to a mere ghost.
Yet he's fleeting, escaping the scene still,
while the owner of the kitchenette
is putting back the bottle

    to where it belonged;
    and he's gone, present no longer.

The drink on the rock—left on the shelf—
is evaporating, following the vaporized guest,
leaving the scent of faint alcohol
that lulls the other friend to regretful sleep.
(C) Copyright: Saul Bae (Sungmoo Bae)

Last Revised: 21th of December, 2020.
Yağmur Kaya Jan 2019
It was so beautiful
Like we've known each other
I wanted to hold your hand
But, of course I couldn't

I just wanted to hold you
Wanted to embrace,
Wanted to touch your face
Feel the heat of your skin
Hear the beat of your heart
Ready to be teared apart
But, of course I couldn't

I was so close, so close to do,
to do all of this!
Was so close to you,
so close to lean and kiss your lips!
Wish I could, how I wish I did!
I asked myself, right said should left said shouldn't
And of course, I just couldn't...
Braedon Nov 2018
I wake up in the morning and
I look into the mirror wandering why I'm still alone
You used to be the most familiar face
And now you're gone
And I'm thinking back on all that
I've done trying to remember what I did wrong
But you know that I can't cause I did nothing to you, you just gave up
I'm curled up in the middle of the room,
sitting on my knees, my face in my hands, my heart begging please...
'Someone fill me up I'm incomplete'
And my daddy never liked you but you's still got along
He warned me bout you, but I thought he was wrong
Babe you had me fooled right from the start,
I hate you for breaking my heart
One day, one day I'll get you back.
Dean K Sep 2018
There are days where I’d like to think I don’t remember you at all
But memories stay and when I think, our memories are all that I recall
No matter how hard I refrain from thinking your name my train of thought comes to a halt

My sub conscious collects change from the strange silhouettes that remain stationary waiting for their stop to be called
They act cautious as my brain begins to strain and forgets what’s true or false anticipating for the top to come off
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