From True Love To Stranger I had never Met,
From Midnight Muse To morning Regret,
Love That once bloomed turned into a thorn in my side,
The Spark Once felt raged into a flame that Burnt Me To a crisp.
marriage isn't dragging the kids into the problems
it isn't aggressively leaving after a fight
it's not sleeping in separate rooms because you couldn't listen to each other
or shouting over the dogs barking, complaining without care
marriage isn't gossiping about the worse of your love to your family
it isn't laying hands on your love or rejecting their opinion
it is not losing value in the relationship and considering separation
marriage isn't ignoring your one-year-old to sleep so your love has to deal with its crying and the messy house
it is not neglecting the responsibility to get a job and not supporting your family
it isn't rejection or ignorance
its everything you haven't shown me
so thank you for showing me what marriage isn't
My heart once belonged
But was thrown around an broken
It belonged to someone
whom I believed to be THE one
But that belief has been betrayed
By lies and empty promises stained
I am on the rough path of recovery
But I get held back by the memories
Oh I wish I could turn back time
and maybe, just maybe,
give us one more try
My heart is broken,
Yet all the shattered pieces,
Love you endlessly.
My hand was open
You chose her
Closed fist and everything.
ill love you again and again without fail
but it's not enough is it?
love doesn't fix wounds
and I haven't got the patience to watch you heal.
Now i was left alone
Alive and breathing
Feeling all kinds of drowning
The second i breathe, the harder i feel
and from that i knew... i might never recover.
And just as i was about to jump to the shallows,
a hand pulled me up from my obscure state.
Telling me how dense i was
for trying to jump in an empty hole.
I asked myself.. Is this what i get?
For giving my all to the one i love?
A voice replied to my side
Saying that there's nothing wrong with having vast dreams
If a man truly holds you dear
He'll understand your every aim.
And in a spur of moment
I found myself in a reverie
He held me slowly
like how the wind caressed my skin.
He told me things i didn't know
Including the feelings i've never felt before
If he was the end of me
Then i would gladly accept my fall.
The waves grew rough
as the strings started to break
my hands held too long that it started to bleed
"Hold on.." i said as i felt his hands glide.
"I can't.." he said as he removed my bleeding hands from his.
"This boat is too small for two people, you have to let go." i felt the sinking of the boat as my tears started to fall i realized,
maybe he was right..
I was too selfish for my own good that i forgot what mattered most..
The one i want to share my dreams with.
The one i want to be with in the future..
Crestfallen and gradually i asked him. "Do you still.. love me?" Every word killed my very being, afraid of the words he'd say.
He kept mum.
I felt this queer feeling- the feeling of being worthless.
My heart aching from so much pain.
My hands throbbing from holding too long.
Little did i know it was me.
It was me who needed the saving.
"You chose your dream and now you lose me." He looks over to his shoulder as he heard a yacht coming.
And still, he chose to leave me at my worst.
What happened to who you used to be
Why the hell did you have to leave
You gave me no reason at all
Never there to catch me when I'd fall
We might be together if you had tried
Instead you said, "F* you. Goodbye"
For you I had worn my heart on my sleeve
Now I'm just the ghost of the girl I used to be
I have never been hurt like the person in this poem. This character I created was so hurt by one person that they feel empty and broken. Written August 19, 2018
The day my lover died,
the room painted in red.
What was once love; love-deprived.
Colorful memories broken into fragments of red.
Gun pointing at me, emotions freed
My lips; sing the song we once sang.
Nerves twitched and muscles spreed.
Silence responded after a loud bang.
You died in my heart the day you walked away.
And I've never believe in reincarnation
So don't come back saying 'I am sorry'
The day my love died; memories now imagination.
The day my lover died.
What was once love; love-deprived.
- Wesley West
My poems reminds me of my pain. But those are past long ago now. What remains are these carvings.