People ask me why I do it.
How do I manage being here
When my Love is
1,446 miles away
Thirteen states away
One time zone away.

"How do you do it?"
"I could never do a long distance relationship." They say.
"I would never be able to handle it."

Well, the truth is
The way I can handle it
The way that helps me to "cope"
Is purely the fact
That my relationship is not
a Long Distance Relationship at all.

In this Love miles may be tangible
but they are everything but definable.
We had Love before there was a distance
and that distance will never be used to
Define us.

No matter how many miles there may be
I can still feel her Spirit with me.
Her laugh rings in my ears when I can barely muster a chuckle
Her fingers gently touch my skin when I drift off away at night
I can hear the gentle yawn of her voice when I get up saying,
"Good morning."
I can feel her singing along with me in the car to our Song when my voice cracks.

Our relationship is not a Long Distance Relationship.
Just because there is distance
does not mean that distance defines It.
She isn't absent until I come home
or when he visits me
My Love is always here.
She may be in whispers, and small chuckles, and light sighs
But a part of her is always here
Always with me
Always there
and I can feel it.

So in a sense
our Long Distance Relationship
has no distance at all.
Because creating distance means to separate or to bring apart
And that's not what our relationship does in the slightest.
If anything
these 1,446 miles bring us closer
Closer than we could ever imagine.

I'm not saying that I enjoy
not being able to physically see her everyday.
But this chapter in our Love is not hard or difficult or too much to handle
And it certainly isn't bringing us apart.
Because we both do not see any other option
This is worth it.
This is right.
This is It.
This is the kind of "It" that everyone talks about
we all hope for "It", search for "It", even die for "It."
and we are so blessed to have found It so early.

So these 1,446 miles will not be permanent
but they are so indescribably worth it.

I don’t know much about god(s),
But I do know a lot about water.
And
If there is
A god
She was sitting right there in that bucket
Carried by Bly, carried with grace
And on the beads of her work
That streamed
down
her
face
Right to her smile.

Her smile.

So seemingly undeserved in the context
Of the situation,
But she taught me that.
And hope
And love
And to be patient.
Because this is one life
And they’ll “get theirs”
In the next one
But try to have faith
And give hard in this one
Because in the middle of all of it
You can’t control any of it
Except who you choose to be,
Regardless of what you’re working with.

So, while

I don’t know much about god(s),
I’d like to believe I do know plenty about me;
And I’m choosing to sit,
         Forever, underneath a magnolia tree.

Patience requires strength
Patience requires consistency
Patience requires discipline
Patience brings tears
Patience in the end reminds you why you waited for this sweetness

After a period of self-assessment,
I’m trying to be a better person.

I want to be more patient, not just ferociously busy.
I want to practice gratefulness, be less snarky
and relentlessly sarcastic.

And even though I keep it pushing, by trying
to put these changes into action, out in the world,
the project is way behind schedule and over-budget
- I may have to make cuts.

Those who
Withstand the darkness
Could gaze the Moon
Even better

Thus
Whenever
There is
Imperfection

Make it ART