I don’t understand why I can’t keep it hidden
It’s so clear it’s so obvious
that what you hide
isn’t truly kept hidden
But you place it in a glass box
pretending as if no one can see
Everyone sees
but everyone says nothing
because nothing is better than everything
because everything is what you hide
and sometimes
I wish
I were
everything

To touch your lips before dawn stretches across our skin
Similar to The Creation of Adam

On the eve of your departure

Where whimsical scripts meet sacrosanct words
Wrapping themselves around your tongue
And ripple like kaftans when sung

We hold these truths to be self-evident
And your vision is honest

I refuse suffering your absence amongst the hunger I feel
Cooking up a plan to capture your heart
A pinch of your perspiration's salt
The kiwi sweetness in your sway

Even if you appear in my dreams, although miles away
It's the best homecoming yet.


Ifeanyi N. Okoro II - © 2018

I hope I'm not too
Obvious
I hope you're not too
Oblivious

You came to me in what I thought was a dream,
but it was actually the mundane,
and the secrets my conscious brain,
was keeping from me.

You were a part of reality all along,
it's just taken me a bit to realize it.
Sunlight can be blinding,
and raindrops are more obvious.

I left you
Left you lying on a bed
Cuddled up with our memories.
I left you to go cry
To rock myself to sleep
Clutching our memories.
I left you
I left you whole, yet I was shattered
Broken pieces of self doubt and insecurity.
I left you to go put myself back together,
To try and regain my dignity
To try and feel happy
I left you to try and figure out
how you can both leave me feeling so good
And also so lost.
I left you because you don't want me
Because I can't continue to want you
And I can't continue to care, when you dont.
I left you because I am chasing a ghost
Running after someone that never started the race.
I left you because I knew you'd let me
Let me run out the door,
Drunk as I was, sad as I was, lonely and playing second fiddle as I was.
I left you because your pity makes me sick
Am I as pathetic as I appear?
I left you because I knew you wouldn't call,
I knew you wouldn't text to see if I was ok.
I left because sleep was more important
To you then my slowly breaking heart and mind.
I left you because I am too dramatic
and even still I know this is my fault,
That this played out the way I knew it would.
I left you because I cannot leave myself.