I don't know what I did
The past is so blurry
I can't remember
What I did to deserve this
My mind won't leave me alone
But you will
My hands move on their own
Texting you again
I know you'll never love me too
I understand you're using me
But red flags through rose-tinted glasses
Just look like flags
Armed with my heart on my sleeve
And rose-tinted glasses
Ready for you to use me
Because pain is the only thing that's real

She looks so happy, always laughing and never crying
But beneath that smile, heart of hers is slowly dying
She's covering it up with that lively mask
Keeping it up just be an impossible task

I hope she knows that one day it will break
And everyone will see that it's all been fake
Not just her smile but her entire life
She's doing it all to escape the knife

She's trying her best but it's cutting deep
And even tho she feels the pain
She'll never let them see her weep

i think i was just used
my mind abused
for ****** gain
and personal strain

he's a good friend
or was rather
now i'm starting to think
i don't matter.

Sitting in a large room
with a few people
around - 2 friends,
20 acquaintance,
One frenemy, and
50 sloggers with a frown.
Every time I look at their filthy face
I tend to rub down
the pain the sarcasm
They use to bring me down.
I often
fail to understand
the purpose why
these ******* are still
running around
For, I find this place
to be ideal for dressing down.
Everyone here looks stuck,
behind the thick walls
of the glorious fraternity
with hidden brawls
trying to solve unworthy affairs
when all they can do is a conference call.
They are highly judgemental and fail to express
the agony behind their not-so-happy face.
Broken and shattered,
Cause they never really mattered.
with their morality scaling down
laughing while facing a nervous breakdown
these losers are nothing but a big pile of
something in the colour
"Yellowish brown."

I’m not entirely sure on how to start,
Other than I have depression,
I feel like I’m falling apart...
This isn’t exactly how I wanted it to be,
But we don’t always get want we want,
I’m just trying to let you know, let you see.
I’m always shrugging my shoulders,
I can’t seem to really get used to it?
But I’m not getting any bolder.
It’s like drowning,
Chained to a rock, i’m Sinking.
I can’t stop, i’m Always thinking.
Crying out of nowhere is fun as well,
It makes me wanna give up my soul,
Literally feels like I’m living in hell.
I don’t ever really talk about it,
No one really... cares?
I don’t know how anyone feels about it...
I just sorta... sit in this silence.
Waiting for this weight to go away.
I don’t like it down here,
I don’t wanna stay.
But I gotta, because i’m Chained.
My mind is insane, constantly strained.
I just wanna go back into your arms,
Where I feel at home.
That way... I can feel some sort of comfort.
I know this is probably not the best poem to explain how I feel,
But it’s the best I could do, I finally broke the seal...

Tell yourself you're worthless a thousand times a day
create a work of abstract art on your arms, blue veins aren't the only lines painting the canvas
forget what a smile looks like, but remeber what happiness felt like
sleep the days away, become a night owl and your prey is your own brain
**** every ounce of humanity that once remained
become the lifeless corpse you pictured in your grave.

Revive yourself
begin to sew the open wounds back together
start to remeber what a smile was and taste the sweetness of the sun in the day
live in your warmth, thrive in happiness
did life truly get better? are you finally happy again?

revert back to your old ways
the golden days were just a figment of your imagination
a wonderland of sorts

happiness for you my dear, is never to be truly obtained.
you're worthless remember? you don't deserve it.

Letting the Light Burn
Flashing stars in an empty room

Say it louder

Turning around around the way I've been taught
Lights Burn and Flashing
Classical piano slower

Say it louder

Another happy thought
Turning the universe around me in my room
Dancing with the stars on my ceiling
It's you
Everyone has a hard day sometimes
You would know more than most
You will never tell with the smile on your face
No one can guess the pain you felt

Say it louder!

Another happy thought
I feel you
I see you living long
No hiding behind the door!
But opening the window for me to join

Say it louder

Another happy thought
Somehow morphing into your shadow
In a way becoming more like you while keeping who I am
Running low
Start to lose my sense of home
Then it's you

Say it louder

Another happy thought
I want eternity
Don't give me a thing
Faces on film is all I see

Say it louder

Another happy thought
You can tell the world now
That it's all gone and now it's all here
Please

Say it louder

Another happy thought