We stand in a crowded hallway.
But it feels empty.
It’s just the two of us.
Staring blankly into each other’s eyes.

Wondering whether or not to say “HI”.
Or to walk away and stay as the strangers we now were.
We stare into each other’s eyes debating whether or not, to hold the door.

Wondering if it was worth starting a conversation.
Knowing we wouldn't work anyway.

We were friends at some point.
Then something more.
Now were merely strangers.

We tore apart before we really ever were together.
We left each other waiting for the other to make the next move.
We left each other open and vulnerable.

You shut down.
And shut me out.
You packed up
Left town.

You left and I stood waiting.  
I awaited a hopeless tomorrow.  

You eventually came back.
Apologizing, saying you don’t know how to say goodbye.
And I left saying, “I don’t know how to say goodbye either”.  

Here we are today.
Nothing but strangers.
Passing each other in the crowded high school hallway.  
With nothing but blank stares.

Saturday, March 14, 2015 an angel was sent to heaven
and oh god was the next day horrible.
Getting that phone call at 6 in the morning from my dad saying you're gone.
I was at my friend's house and i woke her up from my crying.
God, i wish we were closer and i would've known.
I went to church that day, that Sunday morning i figured out.
and i thought about you. Later, i went to my aunts, your mom's.
Everyone was there.
I held your mom so tightly and just cried.
I didn't know my cousin had an addiction. You were only 18.
Why did you have to go so young?
Drugs are such a horrible thing, but i know you're happy now with your dad.
I'm so sorry, Brittani.
I love you so much, i know you're much better now though. I just wish you were still here.
You'll always be my angel.

I want to grab your tie
And pull you in.
Just one kiss
Is my final wish.
Its a dream that
I ever so hold,
That won't be here
In a thousand years.
I miss everything
From your smile
To your slow dance
To the way you glance.
You seemed so awed
But alas it won't be
Because of me
There won't be we.
I'm ever so sorry
You have to go through
The heartaches
And heartbreaks.
I am sorry
So so sorry.

Come to me tonight
Let me kiss you with chapped lips
And pour ***** down your throat
Tell me about the women you've loved
Caressed and then broken
Left behind or forgotten
Light up a cigarette
And speak through a veil of smoke
Tell me about the promises you made
To the one's you've hurt
The ones you didn't keep
Let me wrap you in my arms
In the cover of this darkness
And listen to you breathe
While you tell me lies about staying
I'll kiss your neck
And you'll bite my ear
The liquor on our breath will mingle
You'll teach me about pain
I'll show you love
In that moment you will be beautiful
All alone in your thoughts
Sitting beside me in the dark
Then we'll both fall asleep
To the song our silence makes

Still your pictures on my wall
Still heart beating for you
Still trying to find your hand
        in the darkness of my room

Still dying to have you close
Still shaking when i'm alone
Still loving you with my whole soul
        You've been gone for a quite a while

Still praying for you to come back
Still thinking you're my only one
Still hoping to find a night
                       a night that isnt black

it's like,
cutting an apple in half;
with one drop of the knife
it won't split.
you have to keep pushing
for it to break.

similarly,
a relationship;
with one incident
it won't split.
you have to keep pushing
for it to break.

Well, well, well.
Today is Valentine's Day.
Wait for it...
Wait for it...
And 3, 2, 1.

THIS **** STILL ******* *****!!

We loved this day.
I almost decided to text you this morning.
Impulsive.
But I know that's a bad idea.
Your words would turn into venom,
each painful syllable would strike to paralyze
my feelings when I am already struggling to stand back up.

You used to love my flaws. All of them.
Accepted me for me.
Now you hate my flaws. All of them.
Use them to hurt me and show why we will never be.

It's 11:16 AM right now.
I have 13 hours left.
The fact that you're already making strides to
start a new relationship is literally beyond me.
I guess some bounce back faster than others.

To those reading this,
don't make the same mistake that I did.
If you have something great, don't be stupid.
It's not worth it. Trust me.
Give that person everything they deserve and more.
It only takes one mistake to turn a forever, into a never again.

Happy Valentine's Day.

Whether your dancing to macherina or the anaconda you should stay true to you

Just because the popular girl side-steps right doesn't mean it's wrong to side-step left

Move your feet to your own beat

People will always Judge you but don't give into defeat

Don't stand glued to the floor  like a statue

Why should they bring your attitude down? Never let them see you frown

dance as you please

Ignore the people who try to tease