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Akshat Agarwal Aug 2020
You’ve known me since I started looking down at myself.
What the hell were you thinking when you said : “ I’d be there for you” ?
Isn’t it funny you were actually there to pick up my midnight calls,
Isn’t it funny you were actually rooting for my crusade against the trolls.
Well, I fed on your optimism, twined around it and faked my smiles.
You could’ve gone along with my act but you chose not to.

You’ve known how my dry frown turns upside-down
And yet you make me figure it out by myself.
You please yourself by seeing me out of my comfort zone .
You are selfish, you use me to tickle your funny bone
But I know you mask your good intentions behind the sly wink .
I’m no fool, turning a blind eye to the things you do.

You’ve known places I like to go on a Friday evening
But you take me to the hole I won’t even visit on a Monday morning.
It’s uncanny to face someone else’s fears with them
And you have walked the mile in my old-dusty boots.
I sometimes feel that you’ve reached out to my roots,
Reminded them of my unique existence or maybe resilience.

You’ve known , yes you’ve known it all
And you decide to stay and continue the journey with me.
What’s your intention, motivation, illusion ?
I used to ask these questions and found myself in delusion
But I don’t care anymore about anything and everything.
I’ve known too, maybe not enough but I will always try.
fray narte Jul 2020
i have sealed all the papercuts on my skin;
they have become unmarked,
untended graves
and the willows have long learned
to do their weeping in the dark;
and now,
there can never be enough tears,
never enough mourners
dressed in all the shades of black
to share all this grief
in its most abstract form.

oh, to hear the farewells,
to feel the poems,
to see the wreaths
tossed all over the place
and yet, there can never be enough flowers in the world
to hide these wrists —
all scars and lines for everyone to see
and everyone to read
as if epitaphs to a gravestone;

these wrists —
all scratches from a girl buried by mistake;
the casket, the ground
can only do so much.

oh, such
morbid
thoughts
from such
a morbid
girl;

little one,
you write way too much about death
and his earthly belongings.


maybe one day he'll do the same.
fray narte Jul 2020
i wanna dive head first
into a map of the night skies
trapped inside our four-walled room;
maybe this is where black holes go to die
and they can all stare back at me —
swallowing a chaos of sobs
and a chaos of all your favorite songs;
regardless, i’ll dive into the night skies,
or what it used to be
and name these stars – the ones that remain anyway,
after you.
after me.
after us;
at least they take a long time to die –
long enough for flowers to droop and fall apart
on weeds and lonely epitaphs.

and dear, i hope heaven is holding you closer than i could ever had;
tell me, did you, like sylvia
write suicide notes and call them poetry?

and god do i hope that heaven is holding you so close,
you forget all of the world’s sadness
you once took for your own.

out here, the calendula falls and
my eyes mourn over petal-covered graves
poems cannot hope to beautify.
and i still wish this is something i can wake up from
poetry,
records of my thoughts,
my emotions, its a personal history,
but not my everything
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tAvhRAAusPg&t=263s
Dante Rocío Jul 2020
A proof of truthful reading.
That it’s still of me and that I live:
Left out of and in crying,
Its [story’s] departure by pain of death trespassing.
Justly, so.

Every ending sentence of a subchapter
was here a melancholy more punctuating
Than all the statuses of things
Coming and leaving, explaining better
Than silence.

Lace in eyes/meshes of the numbers,
In God’s notebook.
Miracles of joy, of enigmas from Poetry
Poured had been into the study
In navy blue of mathematics.

The beige of rain of each dot
At the end of each subchapter.

Now I know what the blank pages are for:
Literature is a person,
At their death you don’t leave them
without a word, a touch.
You leave, at least, an epitaph,
with beloving or not.
For at one time you both decided
to bear with each other as one.
You let each letter have and bear
its part in your mind’s eye.

Every time you read:
“My memory lasts 80 minutes.”
Ellipsis.

Thank you
ありがとう
Of Yōko Ogawa’s “The Professor’s Beloved Equation”.
I couldn’t let go of all that love in mathematics,
That devotion for the child.
The legacy.
Apprehension in realisation.

We just take it all from God’s notebook.
Thank you Yōko.
Thank you to that bookseller of Toruń
who recommended it to my uncle
for my birthday present.
ありがとう
to live first,
everything else is optional,
besides consequences
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UQHfemAzABk&t=2s
in the city of souls
i drowned
right in front of
all the killing stares

right before i
gasped for air
i never thought that
silence could ****
so much
than
swears
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