Do they see me?
Do they hear me?

Can you see me?
Can you hear me?

Am I here?
Do I exist?

Those are just some questions that run through my mind,
Everytime they look away, don't respond, don't acknowledge;
I wonder if you know that I'm here,
But you just don't care.

They never do, do they?

Can you hear me?

I fell off the wagon
And my addiction didn't ****
I fell off the wagon
Now I'm riding gravity down the hill
I fell off the wagon
And I was doing great
I fell off the wagon
And I've degraded to a lower state
slipping past the border
Im way past the edge
I only accept counsel from the voices in my head
I fell off the wagon
And you can tell too
I fell of the wagon
But i don't think anyone knew

One light has gone
Beautiful soul has drown
Tried to reach out but extremely ignored
Goodbye letter for once and more
No awarness 'till he was really done

You don’t text or call,
Not when I needed you to.
I sit in the bath.
It’s hot, that’s the first thing on my mind.
As the sweat starts to form,
I think of all I’ve done wrong  
As my cheeks turn pink from the heat,
I ask myself why I deserve this.
I want to get out,
But I can’t seem to stand.
I want to fall asleep,
But I can feel my heart beat.
It’s beating so fast,
Like my chest will explode.
I wish you would text
Or call, I don’t know.

Is it bad?
That I miss the days?
The days where it was just you and me?
Everything used to be so different,
The world was so much brighter.
My smiles were genuine,
I felt like I could do anything.

But now it’s not the same.
I text and you don’t respond,
My calls are declined.
You say to me that you’re busy,
You’re with all your friends.
But, what am I?


Am I not your friend?
You say I’m your best friend,
That you couldn’t live without me.
But I don’t think I believe that,
No, not anymore;
No, not at all.

Is it bad?
That I miss the days?
The days where we would just talk to hours?
You tell me to be happy,
To just try to sleep.
Do you not understand that I try?

You don’t stay awake for me anymore,
You just say goodnight.
There’s no worry for me anymore.
You don’t make the time for me that you used to.
You think I’m okay with that.
No, I’m not.
No, not at all.

Is it bad?
That I miss the days?
The days where you knew me— the real me?

As I sat on the riverside,
I thought to myself,
What does it mean to be alive?

As I sat on the bank of the shore,
I thought to myself,
Why do I wake up in the morn?

As I sat in the absence of light,
I thought to myself,
Why am I being ignored?

As a kid I would talk to my parents,
Now, as a teenager,
I don't.

Not because I don't want to,
Not because I don't need to,
Instead, because I don't think I can.

Instead, I write my feelings out on this website.
Instead, I talk to my friends.
Instead, I ignore the insight,
which has been given to me by god.

Maybe they aren't ignoring me and instead,
I am only ignoring myself.