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why do I make things so heavy
this should be light and airy
without all the frills and expectations
why must I go there when there’s no there to go to?

I was on my way up from the ashes, you, you were beyond any destruction, any distraction
together our inner lights beaming, in action
and our lights traversed in reaction
and now I seek to find matter in what is only photons and neurons
there’s no there there
it only exists in the moments we share
and then it’s gone again

why do I make things so heavy
heavier than Lead
I feel as light as Helium, floating freely as an authentic version of myself

but I am not free. I am led
to believe in this fantasy as my only way out of the dread
I am held back, held down by my own levity

why did I make this so heavy
selina May 2021
times passes slowly now
the only times that had mattered
have all rolled on by

gone with the wind
and the dust has now settled
memories fade with the rays of light

our golden hour is in the past
night falls onto our shoulders
my mind is hesitant to say if it is heavier

than the weight of your words
when you said you were finally happy
my heart bled gold for you
FC Azaele May 2021
The land was cold, and dark and dreary
Spotlights couldn’t be seen
nor sounds be heard
I took a step forward
And decide it wasn’t enough
The woods was cold, dim and soggy
down the roads where footsteps of another
drifting apart, acting no more as a flocking-fleeting friend
The crate lay heavy in my arms
perhaps I should've chosen another
but I'm too far out
to dare go back and ponder
If perhaps.. the crate had been the right one.
but maybe all wouldn't be laid fair,
until another day
where I make it back and choose what
could've been a tranquil road
The lands were cold, and dark and dreary
there's a cottage nearby
but still I stood by the dark pavement
being me,
deciding still one step after the other wasn't enough
to ease myself despite the aching pain
I doubted myself
despite the warm home nearby
that I..
I travelled by
pushing back the aching pain
and went along my way
Ignoring all the protests the soles speak -
I guess I'll have to save my pain for another day
Philip Connett Apr 2021
A BLACK DEVILS TONGUE ROLLS OUT BEFORE ME
HISSING, LICKING, FLAMING & SPITTING

I'M ON THE RUN FROM THE DEMON INSIDE ME
GRINDING WINDING CHURNING AND BURNING

A SCREAMING BULLET TEARS FROM HELLS OWN KEEP
THUNDER QUAKES OF LAUGHTER FROM THE BELLY OF THE BEAST

A BLACK DEVILS TONGUE ROLLS OUT BEFORE ME
HISSING, LICKING, FLAMING & SPITTING

I'M ON THE RUN FROM THE EVIL INSIDE ME
GRINDING WINDING CHURNING AND BURNING

A STREAK OF LIGHTNING BOLT BLISTERING THE EARTH
TREMBLING AND SHAKING LOOSE OF HELLS OWN HEARTH

MUSCULAR SKELETAL CONTORTING
BODY BRACED IS FORCING
SPITTIN SPARKS GRINDIN' WHEELS
KICKIN' FAST AT THE DEVIL'S HEELS

FLIRTING WITH PSYCHOSIS
THIS MADNESS TAKES 'A' HOLD
I'M DRIPPIN' SWEAT
GRIPPIN A SPINNIN' WHEEL
GRINDIN' SPARKS AT THE DEVIL'S HEELS

I'M DRIPPIN' WET
MINDS BLEEDING
THIS MADNESS TAKES A HOLD

I'M GRIPPIN' HARD
ON A SPINNIN' WHEEL
KNUCKLES WHITE ICY COLD

I'M GRIPPIN' WET
MINDS BLEEDING
THIS MADNESS TAKES MY SOUL

I'M DRIPPIN' SWEAT
GRIPPIN' A SPINNIN' WHEEL
SPITTIN' SPARKS
ON THE DEVIL'S HEELS

I'M DRIPPIN' SWEAT
MINDS BLEEDING
THIS MADNESS TAKES A HOLD

I'M DRIPPIN' SWEAT
GRIPPIN' A SPINNIN' WHEEL
WAITIN' FOR THE DEATH KNELL PEEL

A BLACK DEVILS TONGUE ROLLS OUT BEFORE ME
HISSING, LICKING, FLAMING & SPITTING

I'M ON THE RUN FROM THE DEMON INSIDE ME
GRINDING WINDING CHURNING AND BURNING

A SCREAMING BULLET TEARS FROM HELLS OWN KEEP
THUNDER QUAKES OF LAUGHTER FROM THE BELLY OF THE BEAST

A BLACK DEVILS TONGUE ROLLS OUT BEFORE ME
HISSING, LICKING, FLAMING & SPITTING

I'M ON THE RUN FROM THE EVIL INSIDE ME
GRINDING WINDING CHURNING AND BURNING

THIS RUPTURED CHASM ERUPTS SPLINTERING THE HEAP
WILDFIRE SPITTING FROM INFERNAL DEEP

MUSCULAR SKELETAL CONTORTING
BODY BRACED IS FORCING
SPITTIN SPARKS GRINDIN' WHEELS
KICKIN' FAST AT THE DEVIL'S HEELS

FLIRTING WITH PSYCHOSIS
THIS MADNESS TAKES 'A' HOLD
I'M DRIPPIN' SWEAT
GRIPPIN A SPINNIN' WHEEL
GRINDIN' SPARKS AT THE DEVIL'S HEELS

I'M DRIPPIN' WET
MINDS BLEEDING
THIS MADNESS TAKES A HOLD

I'M GRIPPIN' HARD
ON A SPINNIN' WHEEL
KNUCKLES WHITE ICY COLD

I'M GRIPPIN' WET
MINDS BLEEDING
THIS MADNESS TAKES MY SOUL

I'M DRIPPIN' SWEAT
GRIPPIN' A SPINNIN' WHEEL
SPITTIN' SPARKS
ON THE DEVIL'S HEELS

I'M DRIPPIN' SWEAT
MINDS BLEEDING
THIS MADNESS TAKES A HOLD

I'M DRIPPIN' SWEAT
GRIPPIN' A SPINNIN' WHEEL
WAITIN' FOR THE DEATH KNELL PEEL

THESE DARK WINGS
SPREAD OVER MY HORIZON
REIGN IN EVIL
REIGN IN FREEDOM
REIGN IN HELL

THESE RIVERS RUN WITH BLOOD
FLOWING TO THE FLOOD

THESE RIVERS RUN WITH BLOOD
FLOWING TO THE FLOOD


FROM THE GNASHING TEETH OF THE JAWS OF HELL
RASPING GASPING SEETHING AND BREATHING

MOVING FASTER THAN THE TOLL OF THAT FATEFUL BELL
WREAK CRAKE SHREIKS AND SHAKES THE HEATH

WINDIN' DOWN THAT STEEP SLIDE
SLIPPERY *****
LANDSCAPE
RACING
THROUGH
MY
MIND

WINDIN' DOWN THAT SLIPPERY *****
LANDSLIDE
RACING
THROUGH
MY
MIND

WINDIN' DOWN THAT STEEP SIDE
SLIPPERY *****
BLACK TRACKS
RACING
THROUGH
MY
MIND
As if a song/poem that I wrote...  It has a classic & thrashy feel to it...
Jaicob Apr 2021
110
The cursed number
110
In bone and blubber
110
The taste inescapable
110
My thoughts are nonsensical
110
Shrink it further
110
To be skinny I'd ******
110
The burden of weight
110
All myself I hate.
skinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinnyskinny
"I gave birth to you so I can take you out of this world."

So do it then, I'll even hand you the knife you need to send me to an early grave.

Since you always know best don't you?

But let's be real you just don't have the guts to do it.

Maybe I should do it myself.

-Kore
A vent since today is so ****.
Philip Connett Apr 2021
Running Blind Madness
Eyes Wide Heart Pounding
Spirit Lifts Senses Live
Theres Thunder IN THE Atmosphere

This IS A Free Arena
A Gateless Auditorium
Open Fields
Open Wide
Forking Lightning ON THE Horizon

This Natural Inebriation
IN Dynamic Resonation
Anticipation OF THE
Consternataion

Hells Beasts Abound
Snarling Snouts Sounding
Heavy Hoofs Pounding
Crazed Dashing Hounding
IN THE Chaos That'S Surrounding

Hells Beasts Abound
Torso'S Writhing Flailing
Grit Bucking Flailing
Crimson Flow Tailing
THE Gore OF THE Impailing

I'M Knee Deep
IN A River OF Blood
Fleshen Heap
IN THE Reddening Flood

Sodden WET Flesh
Whip AND Turn
Trace THE SKY
With THE Carnal Rain
WET THE Earth
With A Reddened
Stain

Sodden WET Flesh
Whip AND Turn
Trace THE SKY
With THE Carnal Rain
WET THE Earth
With A Reddened
Stain

Sodden WET Earth
Besot With Death Mirth
Drown THE Earth
IN THE Afterbirth
Every Beast THE ****** Herse
DON'T RID ME OF THE ******* Curse

IN AN Ever Rising River OF Blood
Causing Chaos With NO Remorse
I AM Power IN Full Course
Wreaking Havoc

Sump
WET
Dripppin'
Torn
This Bloods LET BY MY Horn
I'M Sopping WET
MY ****** Horn
I Feel Like I'M NEW Born

Drumming Quakes Pounding
Shaking THE Foundation
Lifting Spirits IN THE AIR
I AM GOD Everywhere

Helter Skelter IN THE Chaos
This IS Pandemonium
Freedom Forms
IN THE Void
Electric Flux Obliteration

Pure Intoxication
AS Evil Incarnation
This Revelation
IS Anihilation
As if lyrics of an unfinished song that I wrote when I was about 15 years old...  I dig the atmosphere!
Philip Connett Apr 2021
I've been black my entire life and ne'er have I strayed
The bells peel for me
Give me my berth
I've walked the twisted lightning
I've seen the crystallisation
I have untarnished wings
Give me my berth
The bells peel for me
Give me the chance that speaks o' full volume
Let the scars die in the ashes
Of all this pain beauty is born
Of the burning heart of the darkest ember
The fire spews forth in torrential violence
Give me my berth
The bells peel for me
I've seen the pestilence of the silent waters
The hubris in my brother's brow
The sickness in the succumb of my sisters
The ill-chance of the fated child
I've seen the madness in the living wreck
Heard the shriek of hysteria sow
The living steep of our civilisation
Give me my berth
The bells peel for me

Résurgam
I shall rise again
I shall rise again
I shall rise again

I've seen myself in the straight jacket
I've seen the motled motley jaunt
I've lain for days for the dawning
I've haunted the Earth for too long
Give me my berth
The bells peel for me
Let this fallen star in the deepest agony
Fly free
Give me my berth
The bells peel for me
Give me my berth
The bells peel for me
Give me my birth
The bells peel for me

Résurgam
I shall rise again
I shall rise again
I shall rise again
As if lyrics to an unfinished song...
Marge Redelicia Apr 2021
i can't feel my head
but my heart is oh so
heavy.

unstable, unable

even if i can't get rid of the weight
i hope my head can help my heart carry.
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