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Marge Redelicia Apr 2021
i can't feel my head
but my heart is oh so

unstable, unable

even if i can't get rid of the weight
i hope my head can help my heart carry.
Marge Redelicia Apr 2021
crazy days
we're all kept away
and our memories float then sink
in a heavy haze

through this,
i'm happy to have you:
your truth to keep me awake
and the fellowship
that gives me hope
to strive and stay
first poem in 5 years, wow
Marge Redelicia Jan 2016
I've heard many jewels and gems
Flow out of your lips but
My favorite one of all those treasures
Is this simple, tiny pearl:
This word


A beautiful word that fell on my listening ears
On one of those countless,
Yet no less precious Friday nights
Huddled together in a small group made up of giants

Though I try
I can't recall what the topic was on that certain evening
But that word stayed with me
like postage stamps on love letters
Because for me,
That word best describes you

I see it in the photographs
you take so carefully
With those crafty fingers
You capture novels
with those simple objects and moments
You are an artist and a story teller

I feel it in your tight embrace
Your arms that are ever open and welcoming
And darling,
I'm beyind happy and thankful
That through the long and wild years
Your arms never became weary
In holding on to me

I see it in your smile:
A constant overflow from your heart
It's engraved on your lips and
No hot and tiring day or cold and dark night
Can ever wear it away
I know well that
Hope Himself has made your heart His home
And He has set to flame galaxies
In your bright and burning eyes

This air you breathe
Gets exhaled as some sweet aroma
With the rise and fall of your lungs
I'd be lying to call you unique because
That's a mere understatement
Your very being
Spells "different" differently

As you enter this new year,
This new leg in your journey,
Please do continue to splash
Color on the lives of others
As you dance with the Father
And may your eyes continue to reflect
The beauty of Creation
And the glory of the Creator

Always remember that I am with you
Through hilltops and valleys
And stormy skies and summer days
We can turn this world upside-down
And see it,
Give it
A different
a gift to my friend on her 18th birthday
Marge Redelicia Sep 2015
you told me that you were
just playing it safe,
careful to keep your perfectly powdered face from grime
and getting dirt under your manicured nails.
you try to maintain that posture with poise and grace,
while others break their backs and crawl
on the ground on their knees and bellies.

you told me 
that you are playing nice.
you said that you are loving, caring, kind, and generous
and all those pretty qualities.
that's true,
one glance at your eyes 
is enough to know fully that 
you are also
fearful and terrified.
you are a coward:
a prisoner of pride
playing god as you place your trust on yourself.
taunted by questions of  rejection, ability, and sufficiency,
you cowered in your high tower
instead of joining the frontlines in the fight.
frozen by fear
your heart has gone too numb and cold, for
the doubt and anxiety has put out your fire.

you said that you have won it all.
but actually, 
you know nothing.
about triumph and victory 
for though the world has plunged into calamity,
you were never one with the army.
your bright eyes has seen death
but only from the sidelines.
you defile the purpose of your armor
by keeping it perfectly polished
when it is meant to be stained by mud and blood.

you told me that you were just playing it smart.
you said that it's only rational, logical, 
the normal human response
to take every measure to avoid pain and harm.
you behold the chaos
and cry 
"they are fools!"
you are 
they made themselves
into proud and shameless fools
for they know well that 
the fools are the ones chosen to shame the wise.

playing it nice, safe, an smart
for this is not a game,
this is 

strip off the crown and ball gown and
pick up your sword and armor.
from your high tower,
to the mountains and fields
to the homes and cities
to the trenches and frontlines.
for it's either you lose your self or lose the fight

get ready to pour out sweat, tears, 
and even blood.
though you have yet to see
claim victory:
the war has already been won
before it has even begun.

*it is
Marge Redelicia Sep 2015
Before I entered my new job and got new friends and a new boss
I was a sailor
Sea waters runs through my veins
With kisses, the cool winds have smothered my face
These blue waves used to greet me goodmorning everyday
And ****
My body is so hot
Because under the sun
My skin is just baked

So now
I'm just happy to see
My good old friend again
To unfurl the sails
To hear the floorboards squeak under my feet
To drink the moon glow cascading on us thick like milk

One key characteristic of the sea is its unpredictability
Sheer mystery
And in my lifetime as a sailor
It still leaves me
Grappling with her curious cases of conundrums

Somewhere along the middle
When we thought that we will just sail straight
We just got spat and slapped in the face
By cruel waves and cold wind
From a squall.
Like a storm but more severe and sudden
Too fast this hits us with no warning

The winds stirred the waters
Infusing it with rage
We're being tossed around, manhandled
By the wall of water towering,
Crashing on the boat and swamping everything
Desperately trying to hold on to something
Because I can't
stand straight
But how do I do so when
I can't even get a hold of myself and think straight

As the waters flood the deck
Questions flood my mind
What is happening and
How do we get out of it
How do we keep this ship from getting wrecked?
When dawn breaks tomorrow will there still be
A beat and a breath inside our chests or
Will the sun just find us on the shoreline dead?

Over the roar of the storm
I'm asking why
Why now?
Why us?
When I
Have done nothing wrong
to deserve this harsh punishment
This cruel treatment
My hands are clean
I'm innocent
Faithful, in fact
To You Jesus

What are you doing?
Why are you sleeping
so soundly
On a cushion at the back of the ship?
How can you ignore this raging storm
The impending wreck which will seal
Our certain deaths?
Don't you care?
Can't you see?
How can you bear to sleep through our agony?
Have you forsaken us
And allowed us wallow in despair and tragedy?
Wake up! Jesus please
Where are you
in this desperate time of need?

Finally he awakens
And to all my questions he responds with one as well
He asks me
Where is your faith?

I fell
And so does the squall
Mighty you arise and speak with authority
You command the wind and the waves to cease
And they do
They were viciously violent
But now
They've calmed down
The sea is conquered by

One more question
Who is this man?
Who are you Jesus
That though the tides and torrents come
You can still sleep soundly like a baby
Resting in security with the fact
That no storm can ever bring you down to defeat
You are
so powerful
You command all noise to
You see joy and beauty amidst the mess
When chaos hears your voice
It ceases
So please
Speak on

We'll have infinite questions but
Zero or even negative answers
Though the world falls apart
falter we won't
A paradox
Transcending all understanding
This powerful peace
Strong serenity
And that is because
Hope is here
And Hope cares for me
For us
Now i know
That as long as He is with me
the storm is a sanctuary
A spoken word
Marge Redelicia Sep 2015
you are
drawing me
almost mechanically but almost
because i am bound by my own volition
almost rationally

and as i inch closer
your energy
radiance i cry
oh my
your warmth
holds me
permeating my skin
seeping into these
iron arteries and
cold, cold guts
(you unravel my knots)

my eyes reflect you
because you are all i see:
all i want to see
i'm a submissive prisoner to your beauty
captivated willingly

i am yours
and even if never
will you be mine
**** it
**** it all
yours i will still be
and no
this is pure delight to me,
i won't consider it a tragedy

your embers are worthy of stars
your hot fumes to me an aroma
and if the price of becoming close
and closer
to you is the
disintegration of my flesh
so be it
give me death
i only feel alive
when i am with you

so burn me please
written with 5 people in mind
I don't know anymore this is just word dump haha
Marge Redelicia Aug 2015
it was a rainy day.
actually it was a stormy day.
not as ravaging as the hurricane in my heart though.
however, i don't understand why
though the winds howled and the thunders crashed
inside my chest,
not a drop fell from my eyes.

lunch break rush
it was surprising and nostalgic to find
that all the tables were filled up except
the one
where we sat together
exactly a year and a month ago.

nothing has changed.
the restaurant's still crowded and noisy,
same old wobbly chairs,
same view of the the high-rise buildings
and kids playing around in the flower shop.
the only difference is that
you are not there
sitting in front of me.
i am alone.
in place of your smiles and stories
there is just
and that's how it will be for 5 years
as you board the plane in 3 days.

i sat there staring at my reflection
in my cheap cup of coffee that has gone cold.
i'm pondering
how should i knock on your door one last time?
how could i make my lips turn upward
despite all these feelings that's bearing me down?
i'm asking
where is the good in goodbye?
what now when you're gone,
and all that's left are these sweet memories
that now sting
because these fragmented thoughts
are all i'll ever have of you?
i'm questioning
why do you even have to leave?
why of all the people in my life
it had to be you?

it was a rainy day.
actually it was a stormy day
and the sky is weeping, wailing
in my place.
i find it ironic though how
the sky is where you will be
in the next 3 days.
did i even use the word ironic right? i don't know anymore.
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