I'm hungrier than you
I'll take all the cake
and eat that too
I'm fat with, passion
You can bet your ***
on that one
Read that one in a caption
If you can't accept my truths
Then you can't accept who I am to
So just dig yourself a grave
and lay in it
Don't want your opinions
I'll just bin it
Comfortable in this skin
I've been gifted
You can cover me with labels
But I'm stable on this one-legged table

There have been so many times
I've questioned the choices
I've made in this life
Nothing can be changed
I'm here in this sitch
From foiled plans
I was on my stomach
crawling through a wasteland
I found strength through the fall
Now I stand,
Yeah, I'm marked, Yeah, I'm scarred
I'm standing, changing my branding
New thoughts through clear minded eyes

Never too late to refresh the page
Start a new story in this franchised novel
A brand new book, Blank page, clean slate
It's alright, never too late
No matter what age
Never too late for change
Slow down, taking a new pace
take your time to set the stage
The spotlights there, when you're ready
There will be a time and chance
for you to ignite these skies
and blow everybody's minds

Mind says you want your keep
well you better earn it
It's better if you just learn that
sooner then later
You'll come to understand
sometimes moments framed in your mind
don't come to fruition
It's all about not giving in
Doesn't mean you can't do it
Just means that's not the way
you went meant to make it
So for new chances just create it
Keep on shooting
eventually, something sticks

There have been so many times
I've questioned the choices
I've made in this life
Nothing can be changed
I'm here in this sitch
From foiled plans
I was on my stomach
crawling through a wasteland
I found strength through the fall
Now I stand,
Yeah, I'm marked, Yeah, I'm scarred
I'm standing, changing my branding
New thoughts through clear minded eyes

Never too late to refresh the page
Start a new story in this franchised novel
A brand new book, Blank page, clean slate
It's alright, never too late
No matter what age
Never too late for change
Slow down, taking a new pace
take your time to set the stage
The spotlights there, when you're ready
There will be a time and chance
for you to ignite these skies
and blow everybody's minds

Ever feel like you've wasted a decade
of your life
Those were thoughts that entered my head
Until the realisation
It was just training
For me to be prepared
The rewards are there to reap
Just gotta keep trying ideas
until something hits
explode into imagination
There's no destination
You can't reach
When you put all your focus
Into what you want
You're gonna achieve it
Don't let anybody tell you
That you'll never do it
They'll be the ones that look dumb
When you reach it.

There have been so many times
I've questioned the choices
I've made in this life
Nothing can be changed
I'm here in this sitch
From foiled plans
I was on my stomach
crawling through a wasteland
I found strength through the fall
Now I stand,
Yeah, I'm marked, Yeah, I'm scarred
I'm standing, changing my branding
New thoughts through clear minded eyes

Never too late to refresh the page
Start a new story in this franchised novel
A brand new book, Blank page, clean slate
It's alright, never too late
No matter what age
Never too late for change
Slow down, taking a new pace
take your time to set the stage
The spotlights there, when you're ready
There will be a time and chance
for you to ignite these skies
and blow everybody's minds

©2018 Written By Benji James

People Strive
to see the ocean beyond the great island
But often do not realise
that we are all in the same pond.
We feel the ripple in the water
Calling us
Feeding us thoughts that create an image of
How the world wants YOU to see
But when the water is drained
And the steps are set
We often question where we began
And what was left

Slurp, slurp, slurp, slurp
Yellow straws pierced paper cups
My best friend Darcie sat opposite me but I’m drifting into my own day dream
Sorry buddy, I was busy thinking about boys
                                   ……….
I love it when they are 24 with their hoods up riding on their skateboards
Cigarettes exhales, face in a smoky haze
Sips from their pints, long phone calls at night
Out in the town with their boys, gentle stubble cute glasses, cheeky winks whilst passing
I love a guy who is both cocky and sweet with the latest Vans on his feet
His sense of humour pours with hilarious sarcasm, he lives for “the bantz”
I love it when a guy makes us both a cup of tea when he didn’t even ask me
I love it when they are cheeky, moody, funny, cocky and silly
Lying in bed every Sunday holding me
Messy tousled hair everywhere, fingers through mine, a hoodie I live in, a chest I feel protected with
Then, suddenly, Darcie snaps her fingers, I’m bought back to reality, sorry, I was busy thinking about boys……..

                                          ……………….
Saturday night, glitter flies, house party chaos inside cigarettes smoking, everyone drinking, rain pouring-
I stand in the corner, me and the queens there’s some tens they’ve just seen
I drink my drink, words are getting slurred
No time to think
Some lads walk over to us but they aren’t the lads I like
My mind wonders…….
                                            …………
I like guys with tousled hair and a soulful stare
I love sculpted features they are such handsome creatures and unique smiles so secret, I couldn’t tell anyone else
I love a tall lad who can make me laugh and I don’t mean giggle a little I mean **** my pants hilarious
I like a guy who is controversial, someone who is not afraid to say what he wants, a sassy man who can match me
I adore talent, someone who is brave from all the demons he has faced
“Earth to Hannah! Babe, you want to drink?”
Kirsty is in front of me
Oh **** yeah mate sorry, I was busy thinking about boys
                                            …………
Sunday hungover, watching Buffy the vampire slayer, obviously eating pizza
Then, in walks Ella
“Hannah, honey, I need some advice from ya!”
Ok.
Her lips are moving but her words are lost in translation
I don’t notice her frustration
Because, of course, I was busy thinking about boys
                                          ………..
I would love a sarcastic, cocky, cheeky lad to read me books on love
Then stare into my soul and say he’s found his, I am enough
To claim his search is over and even love me when he is sober
Sunday is made for napping in his arms in our fort of no harm
Drinking tea together in our lazy state not only is he a lover but also a soul mate
I would feel so pretty every time he looks at me, he would never cheat
I would chop his ***** off if he did, he knows this
Nah seriously though,
I really ******* would
But he would say “I don’t need to look anywhere else”, he’s being honest, I can tell
“Hannah! **** sake, are you listening?”
Sorry mate, I was busy thinking about boys
                             …………..
Long day, a thousand coffees consumed, I’m finally home
I race to my room I want time on my own
Candle light dancing on these walls the flame burns to white
Incense lit, vinyl’s play, I close my eyes and disappear into the night
Not even answering phone calls because I’m so busy thinking about boys
                              ………
My dream tall happy, funny, cocky king of street style he rides on his skateboard for miles, out with his boys drinking pints
Giving out cheeky winks but when he lays his eyes on me it’s his heart I win
**** stubble brushing against my soft delicate skin constantly wearing his clothes I live in
Fingers intertwine all the time, his body entangled in mine
And, on the days he’s not fine I do what I can to bring him back to life
He will be the bravest man I know because those demons never got your soul
Messing each other’s hair, breathing in cold air, running through the streets like we don’t care. His soulful stare
I love him so much
Sunday church is only present in our bed where we worship each other, he is my best friend and my soulmate like no other
We read to each other drinking tea together in our den of safety where he feels like home to me
His sarcasm gets me through every awkward family gathering
I laugh so hard I need to ***, he is the one for me
I haven’t met him but I’m in love already
He’s a good man, he doesn’t lie or cheat and he’s seen me in all my defeats but he’s helped me stand up once again where he chased away the pain
He’s a talented soul but he doesn’t believe it so yet I tell him everyday
We saved each others lives in a way.
So, yes to answer the question I was thinking about boys but there’s one particular,
His name unknown, no one you know
Nether do I
But I'm sure he is the one who will stay and be forever mine locked away in a locket close to my beating heart
I will not apologize for thinking about him, the one true love I will find
                                   …………

You said I couldn't be successful.
You made me break down in tears.
You're supposed to be an influencer;
someone who will shape me for years.

Aren't you supposed to be my teacher?
Well, what are you teaching me?
I can never be worth anything.
I am not who I am supposed to be.

I have learned nothing from you
except for the all the lies you have told.
I can be worthy despite what you say.
You don't know what the future holds.

Hello everyone,

  I'm so very sorry … I feel horrible doing this, but I have no choice. You see, I have published my first book on Amazon/Kindle! This piece (and many others) had to be taken down because they do not allow published material to be available online for free. (Go figure) I wanted to leave the shell of the posts because I felt compelled to leave all your helpful and loving comments. (Silly sentimental, I know), but I also didn't want to just have the pieces disappear without an explanation. I feel bad enough as it is!

  I owe ALL of you so, SO much for all of your reads, love, and support. It was YOU that gave me the gumption to FINALLY get off my **** and publish! Thank you all for the warm comments, camaraderie, and encouragement! I will still be here, reading, uploading and just being the Rascal that I am. How could I EVER leave you guys?

  The book is called “The Way I See It – FictionPhilosophySoul Food” and it will be FREE for the first few days on Kindle Select, so watch for it, if you are interested. I hope that you go and grab it. If you do, I would also hope that you find it worthy, you would leave me a good review. That will help me get in the public eye! Soon afterward (2-3 days or so), it will be available in paperback.

Find the book(s) here: www.amazon.com/author/jeff.gaines

Or find the book(s), and all about me, here: www.JeffGaines.world

  Soon after, I also hope to have my first novel (a supernatural thriller), called “Wanderer” available as well!

  Wish me luck!

                                Big, Biggest Love,

                                               Jeff Gaines

Hello everyone,

  I'm so very sorry … I feel horrible doing this, but I have no choice. You see, I have published my first book on Amazon/Kindle! This piece (and many others) had to be taken down because they do not allow published material to be available online for free. (Go figure) I wanted to leave the shell of the posts because I felt compelled to leave all your helpful and loving comments. (Silly sentimental, I know), but I also didn't want to just have the pieces disappear without an explanation. I feel bad enough as it is!

  I owe ALL of you so, SO much for all of your reads, love, and support. It was YOU that gave me the gumption to FINALLY get off my **** and publish! Thank you all for the warm comments, camaraderie, and encouragement! I will still be here, reading, uploading and just being the Rascal that I am. How could I EVER leave you guys?

  The book is called “The Way I See It – FictionPhilosophySoul Food” and it will be FREE for the first few days on Kindle Select, so watch for it, if you are interested. I hope that you go and grab it. If you do, I would also hope that you find it worthy, you would leave me a good review. That will help me get in the public eye! Soon afterward (2-3 days or so), it will be available in paperback.

Find the book(s) here: www.amazon.com/author/jeff.gaines

Or find the book(s), and all about me, here: www.JeffGaines.world

  Soon after, I also hope to have my first novel (a supernatural thriller), called “Wanderer” available as well!

  Wish me luck!

                                Big, Biggest Love,

                                               Jeff Gaines