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Never have I seen a girl with eyes so dark
Made blacker by the light of my star sparks
I have never met a child so utterly
Who stares at me blatantly with
The cold dead eyes of a fish

Who would believe? I-
Who could conceive? I-
A girl so naive, I..
how shameless of me to consider you primitive

There I go again, I
Say I love you, then I
go and mock you when I
Make your name into something so completely diminutive
There’s no way to love you if I
Stand on pedestal made from sky

It’s been a long time since I wrote about these two :) this is from the sky-creature’s perspective

“an indefinitely small quantity; a value approaching zero.”
I can’t help it
There’s so much hate in my heart now
Anger is flashing it’s ugly claws
And ripping all my kindness out
Cause really
I haven’t been able to take a deep
Breath in about three years
and it’ll be three years till I can breathe you out again
Till I can let you
back in again

My love
if I admit how much you
mean to me
Where will that leave me
When you decide to leave me?
  Sep 2019 Jeff Gaines
Samira Sara
Sitting in the dark, my beating heart starts to wonder, its 2am and i m all alone in the desert, torn apart.

Thirsting for some satisfaction, searching for home, love is nothing without action but I'm all alone.

Lonely night and pointless days, feeling blind through the bright sun rays. Everyday feels exactly the same and still I'm all alone.

Maybe its good enough and I like it here, alone in the dark with nothing to fear.
  Sep 2019 Jeff Gaines
Samira Sara
He was the moon
         Eclipsed all over my radient heart
The world would have seen us
        But he covered everything in dark
In that finite moment
        We loved and kissed hard
Until the rules of the universe
         Tore us apart.
One sided love is sign of bravery.
  Sep 2019 Jeff Gaines
Heart of Silver
Upon those jewel-encrusted toe-tips
she docilely placed her royal-red lips

A boy not a king and yet she bowed down
to the ******* who tried to soil her crown
  Jul 2019 Jeff Gaines
It’s been 3 months since my last panic attack.
Oh, you mean its been one?
A understandable misunderstanding,
For it’s not like I know myself.
One tends to drop the childish habit,
Of gnawing at shreds,
When there is little left to know.
Only so much scent to unmask,
So much ‘purpose’ you can detect,
A sliver of a ‘lesson’ you can collect.

So I’ll stop fiddling with the rag doll,
Leave my questions behind,
Barricade the door,
Crush it shut,
Banish the key,
Til eternity sees
The light of day.

⁃ For it’s not like I’ll ever know myself
  Jul 2019 Jeff Gaines
If I were blessed with normalcy,
I would not value the flutter
Of my heart, as it spies
A surprise greeting
A friendly smile.
No palpitations,
Involuntary twitches.
It throws back .
A friendlier smile,
A lively chat.
Without vacant stammers,
Or painful grins,
Joy carefree,
Like a castaway wave,
Casually recedes
Off a glimmering ocean.
And when the encounter repeats itself
I will bear no shame,
Or race away in reluctant haste,
The grand, nail biting retreat,
Unable to speak.

I would barely brace,
As the lunch bell rings,
And smoothen the grin on my dimpled cheek.
Smoother than the slip,
Of a phone into my pocket.
Cause when I zip down the hall
And seek,
strange familiar faces,
For the fun of it,
Desperate typing,
Has no place.
There’s no need to sell pathos
To a pair of kind eyes,
Then lunge in for an awkward sip
Of juicebox compassion.
A daily fix.
Instead I’ll wait
A grand, weighty two minutes
And practise compassion,
Saving places,
In a line too long,
before they come
shoulder slapping, rag-tagging
Nonsense and hilarity,
encircles me.

As I catch myself swirling,
I struggle to be freed,
From the dazzling sway,
Of this,
Cruel, cruel daydream.

With a hollow, dry cackle,
I'll concede,
"Oh, If I were blessed with normalcy!"

Won't that be,
Just funny.
Thanks for reading my work. Feedback is always appreciated.
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