They always said
How much the little girl
Was like her daddy--
The way she stood
Walked 
Movements
Gestures--
Cute when she was small

But the older she gets
The more she takes on
More serious aspects--
My strengths
My weaknesses.

Proud to see her
Strong personality—
Flashbacks to my youth.
Strong-willed
Free in spirit
As a young deer
Kinking up its hind legs
In defiance of constriction.

A free spirit sees
No need for the fences
We build to contain it
To control their so-called
Baser instincts.

In her my strengths are
Magnified-- but oh
So are my weaknesses--
My weaknesses magnified!

Looking at this
Living mirror of myself
Magnifies
Intensifies
A normal father/daughter
Relationship.

I think I see clearly because
I think I know myself so well--
I chastise myself
I condemn my weaknesses
The mistakes I made in my youth.

I look down at me
She looks up to me.

They say she is
So much like her daddy
But she is much more--
Part mama
Part gran
Part grandma
A tapestry of traits
All formed in her
Along with what her social
Environments have
Sown and reaped.

The teenager often sees the
Outward beauty of a
Model or movie star--
Someone is always
Better looking
Someone else always
Has more of something.

I try so hard to make her see
That this is so common
A feeling--
She is above all this
She is not run of the mill.

Time has proved
That I see more
Than what meets the eye
But this knowing
Holds possible dangers--
I can see ahead to
Warn her of trouble
But there are troubles
That she must endure.
Over-protection--
Every parent knows this pain.

I do not want to fail her
But distance grows
Between us when
I monitor her progress
When I push and ****
To make her less like daddy.
She shouldn’t be like me--
I have too many regrets.

I sometimes hear sounds that
I cannot distinguish--
I hear fluttering sounds
That I think are birds
Flying out of the trees
But in reality it is the wind
Blowing high
Through the pines.

I see shadows of strangers
Seeking mischief
Shining bright
Lights at the family tent
In the cold
Half-dream-state
Of the cold night--
But reality says it is
The distortion of the campfire
Through the fabric of the tent.

I cannot always distinguish
Certain sights and sounds
At certain times
But time reveals what
They truly are.

But to bite the tongue
When I wish to scold
Out of season--
To stop focusing on our
Likenesses to the point
Where I cannot differentiate
Between my feelings
Or what I used to feel
And the individual soul
That my daughter is.

They always say how
much she is like her daddy--
Maybe daddy needs to change.

I get so high
I look up past the sky
I look back down
and I wonder why
I'm somewhere in between
I'm almost in a dream
monsters make me laugh
angels make me scream
I get so low
nowhere down to go
I look back up
and I just don't know
whether I will defy
what is right before my eyes
devils wear a path
angels wear a disguise

for Thomas Raine Crowe

...These nights bring dreams of Cherokee shamans
whose names are bright verbs and impacted dark nouns,
whose memories are indictments of my pallid flesh...
and I hear, as from a great distance,
the cries tortured from their guileless lips, proclaiming
the nature of my mutation.

NOTE: My “mutation” is that my family appears to contain English, Scottish, German and Cherokee blood, meaning that my ancestors were probably at war with each other. Did my English ancestors force my Cherokee ancestors to walk the Trail of Tears?

I have recently created these new translations of Native American poems, proverbs and sayings ...

What is life?
The flash of a firefly.
The breath of a winter buffalo.
The shadow scooting across the grass that vanishes with sunset.
—Blackfoot saying, translation by Michael R. Burch

Speak less thunder, wield more lightning. — Apache proverb, translation by Michael R. Burch

The more we wonder, the more we understand. — Arapaho proverb, translation by Michael R. Burch

Adults talk, children whine. — Blackfoot proverb, translation by Michael R. Burch

Don’t be afraid to cry: it will lessen your sorrow. — Hopi proverb

One foot in the boat, one foot in the canoe, and you end up in the river. — Tuscarora proverb, translation by Michael R. Burch

Our enemy's weakness increases our strength. — Cherokee proverb, translation by Michael R. Burch

We will be remembered tomorrow by the tracks we leave today. — Dakota proverb, translation by Michael R. Burch

No sound's as eloquent as a rattlesnake's tail. — Navajo saying, translation by Michael R. Burch

The heart is our first teacher. — Cheyenne proverb, translation by Michael R. Burch

Dreams beget success. — Maricopa proverb, translation by Michael R. Burch

Knowledge interprets the past, wisdom foresees the future. — Lumbee proverb, translation by Michael R. Burch

The troublemaker's way is thorny. — Umpqua proverb, translation by Michael R. Burch

And...it's here. A future. Agile? I was not enough to be.

Black in it's entirety. A new beginning and a new me.

Clockwork. As though a plan hatched by some supreme being.

Dear dog, which came first? Was it the white or the black?

Either way, it effortlessly taints your profoundly glorious genes.

**** this! Atrocious. Drugs?!

Goodness me. How did we get to this?

Horrible, dehumanising, and it's here to stay.

"It suppresses". But really only in the mildest of ways.

Just to remind you of the control you once had.

Killed! And now ceded in it's entirety to a tad bit of a fad.

Let me just turn back the hands of time! 

My fate I leave with you alone. 

Nothing seems to relieve this pressure and irreparable pain. 

Oh God! Could I be spared such a destiny?

Prayers.

Queuing from my heart to yours. 

Respectfully admonishing your power and grace. 

Simply, do I ask for that childlike sense of serenity.

To take me to a place of restoration and hope. 

Unlock my mind. Repair my soul. For vaults of this kind are too strong.