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D Jun 2016
The kind you have to fight to heal from everyday,
while faced with the one who brought the pain..
Yup.
D Jun 2016
I felt it in my heart,
With every touch and every kiss.
I knew it in my gut -
A twisting sickness.
Now here we are,
The edge of forgiveness.
Trying to heal,
Despite the fear you'll repeat this.
The worst kind of heartbreak -
The kind you have to fight to heal from everyday
while faced with the one who brought the pain.
Forgive my eyes for being blind.
They only see pain.

Forgive my hands for shaking.
I can't stop them from being afraid.

Forgive this head for over-thinking.
I can't feel safe.

Forgive my tears for being absent.
My eyes are not aloud to cry.

Forgive my body for not being able to feel.
It isn't strong enough to bear it's pain.

Forgive my heart for being silent.
It was silenced long ago by a bad man.
just a written
kaycog Jun 2016
For my sixteenth birthday she gave me a locket
Which I keep inside a bag, inside a box, inside of my drawer
All shiny and silver, with initials engraved
Carved on its back the date forever saved
It is resting undisturbed, never worn out
Though I try it out from time to time
Put it on by the mirror and wonder to myself
This is who I would be had things stayed the same
I shake my heavy head, unclasp it from my neck
The last piece of you at last is removed
And yes, I do try to forgive
But to this day that locket stays
Inside of a bag, in a box, at the bottom of my drawer

I don't put it on anymore
This one was published
R Jun 2016
walk inside this body
find the places where
I am most damaged, shattered
love me, cherish me there
and let me forgive this body
for abandoning itself
D Jun 2016
Don't tell me that you can't see it
I was never there and I can feel it
Her fingers in your hair --
Ten daggers piercing my heart
I feel it still and I'm trying to breathe
But it's tearing me apart
My lungs are filled with the poison
That she left lingering on your skin
You say it's all harmless; you're only friends
Then why do I feel so afraid?
Like any minute you'll be walking away?
Don't tell me I'm only jealous
I hear it in your voice
You're guilty and in denial
But you still have a choice

***
Sasha May 2016
I know, I know, I'm sorry.
I can't help but speak my selfish thoughts into the wind.
Scold me like you should. I need it badly.
I need your deep voice to yell at me. How selfish of me, always needing.  
I say I have your intentions at the root of my thoughts yet I know I'm lying.
Please tell me this lie i speak is a little white one.
I say I'm doing this for you. I know I'm doing this for me.
Your lips are 9,222 Kilometers away from mine. I can't stand it anymore. It's crawling under my skin, causing me to itch.
My selfish heart needs your lip on me.
The blazing sun and blue skies roll around the corner and I need someones lips on mine. I'm breaking away.
Forgive me, I know I am wrong.
Ambika Jois May 2016
I’ve walked on fire and thorns
Forgotten what the ground feels like
Every step I took were upon my wounded soles
How does a caged bird know to fly?

I rattled my gates every day
They were strong, metallic and I wasn’t strong
Every lift off was in vain,
How foolish was I to think, to the sky I belonged?

I, like a mother for her child, wanted more
To see within my veins, my being flourish at the mere tune
Every note was becoming a part of a song
How quick was I to dream of this music as a boon?

I feel that rumble inside me
My hunger, anger and desire upon my own pyre
Every day I wish for that first day again
How can I ingrain my liberty from this quagmire?
Ever felt so guilty about having done something you shouldn’t have done? How do we overcome such guilt? How do we forgive ourselves? Every crack of dawn and every approaching dusk, we fear being reminded of our wrong doings. All we want to do is forget that it ever happened. Sometimes, we live every single day with a constant reminder of such things and feel so lost yet liberated that the truth is out in the open. We feel so caged yet freed from the burden of bearing a hidden confession. We feel so ashamed yet lucky to be given another chance to once again become that person we know we want to be. We feel so neglected, undeserving of trust and at the lowest point of self-esteem yet we feel the power of our prayers would give us another life to live it like we could never again commit such a sin.

This poem emblazons the message underlying in our struggles to surmount our better selves from who we used to be. We know we will conquer our hardships and can see ourselves on the greener side of our own emotional quotient but let’s not forget how many doubts, fears, questions, rejections, isolation and punishments it takes for us to climb in order to stand right at the top. That top spot is very much ours, we very much deserve it, and we have every single step from the quagmire to the sky to credit for our liberation.
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