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Toxic yeti Feb 17
As I hear
The roar
Of a jet enegine
I look up and
See a Boeing 777
Take off
The ultimate freedom.
Today I am no longer very happy with myself
It seems excuses that I've made are damaging my health
The daily life; Can't make the grade
Each time anew, repeats the same
Don't know what's wrong inside my brain
Though breathing air, I'm in a grave
Sleep walking while I am awake
Feel like I am a big mistake
I'm bitter, angry, filled with hate
It always points to the same place

An arrow pointing back at me
Digging its way inside
To all the blackened anger
and the worthlessness I hide
The outer layers show the world
the talents I possess
But also show I **** things up
and make my life a mess
I always seem to give myself
lots of unneeded stress
I stack on extra burden
Adding mountains of duress

If only poltergeists or demons
took me and possessed
But no such luck, instead I live
a fate that's worse than death

These words aren't new; Placed down before
with pencil and paper
And yet I live a life unchanged
For reasons I'm not sure

Complain and pout or ***** and whine
I'm getting better at
Instead of making real effort
To get what I've lost back

A statement to the reader
Something I want to confess
One simple reason to explain
Why my life is a mess

The actions and the choices
that I make from day to day
It's all of this and only this
Why my life is this way

So here I stand at fated fork
Two choices here for me
Can make the choice to make a change
or give up and repeat

But either way there is one thing
from this day I won't do
No more will I write my complaints
and feed that **** to you
Written: October 26, 2018

All rights reserved.
She fed my soul with the
Kindest of hands.
Revealing a hunger I didn't know.
I ate from her hands,
Knowing the pieces that she gave
Were near & dear.
I ate expecting her to stop.
Seeing past her body,
These beautiful hands.
I'd wave my hand to stop
But instead she smiled and continue to give more.
She gave pieces of her soul.
Her hands like spoons,
Blowing the pieces that were too hot.
Easing them into my mouth.
Her hands like home
The heartbeat I knew with in.
Warm, comforting.
How can so many continue to believe
How can so many be so trusting
Trusting in our failing government
Trusting in the daily lies spread
What is it gonna take ?
It's so obvious it really is
It gets so frustrating
When will we all be done
What is it gonna take
I mean seriously can it get any worse
It's plain to see no one's caring
about our freedoms our rights our needs
It's all just a competition
So many of us poor barely scraping by
So many treated like ****
Can't we all say enough
It's our government
It's up to us to say enough
and if we don't like now
I'm sure it's gonna end
It won't be pretty it will be distruction
Utter pain and devastation
© Jennifer Delong 1/14/19
Siddeeqah Glover Nov 2018
I hope they understand that I'm tired
I've had enough
So today, and After today I am first
Until the end
When you are fed up with people constantly stepping over you and not appreciating you after all you've done for them even after you put them before you
Jessica Jarvis May 2018
When I would visit Ohio, my grandma always said
certain things in Spanish, as to not flood my head.

I wish I understood that secret life she led
by interpreting her knowledge, I know to have been well read,

But now my striving hunger will never be quite fed,
for now those precious, foreign words are unforgivingly dead.

Oh, how I cry very often, at night while I’m in bed.
Regrets like these don’t go away, so I try to cope instead.

I’ll never forget her loving Spanish ***** (that memory’s never fled),
even though my nostalgic heart regretfully succumbs to dread.
5/4/2018

:(
Julian Delia Apr 2018
A mentality
Permanently ingrained, a lack of impartiality
A mentality of one tribe, one leader
Conquerors of all
Watching one denomination rise
As the others fall.

We see this
In our daily lives;
Competition is our focus.
The locus
Of our society
Is the proliferation of one
At the behest of many –
The most popular,
The most fashionable,
The most sought after,
The best of the best.

This ideology
Is a narrow, winding road
Fraught with many perils –
For example, in our education,
There is this infatuation
With the pressure cooker environment.
This toxic affinity
Of the extension into infinity
Of one’s mental ossification
Of the mind’s degradation
As it is appraised
By a system that is based
On the standardised quantification
Of the truthfully divine abilities
Of the human mind.

A system designed to create drones.
It’s basically a free-for-all;
A few get to be called the best
Whilst the rest
Fall through the cracks.
Those who struggle
Are risking getting marginalised
Or at least, probably penalised –
The letter ‘F’ blankly stares back at you,
Its power to grade one’s mental capacity
Wielded like Aaron’s Rod
Borne by those who receive it like the Mark of Cain.

The us vs them attitude
Arises from this system
A point of interest on the same latitude.
We built a world
That conditions in us
Not a spirit of co-operation
But one of aspiring to *******
The prioritisation
Of one person or group deemed fit to rule over all;
Be it a sport, or a work of art
A theory, a criticism,
Or a measurement of the schism
Between one political party and another
It does not matter –
If there is an issue, people will be divided.
Those of us who think outside these parameters
Those who dare look for intelligent, fruitful discussion
Are destined to a life of being given the side-eye
A social concussion.

Why must we compete?
Why is our life replete
Not with community spirit and a betterment of humanity
But with iron-****** regulation
And an inability to concede?
Why must we divide our resources
Not fairly and justly for all
But like a fire that scorches
Consuming all it finds
With no thought for the morrow?

Imagine
7 billion human beings
Not only co-existing
But actively seeking
To be smarter,
To consume less, to work harder
Not on commercialisation or profit
But on travelling farther
In the realm of human creativity,
On sustainable ingenuity
And the wiser administration
Of a planet we inherited.
Always, incessantly
We adhere to our tribe’s superstitions;
Our decisions
Are not exclusively ours
But a result of countless hours
Of indoctrination, of believing in entities
Not morals or principles – in our identities,
We conceive of ourselves as vessels that are imbued with what we consume,
Not with what we are actually made of.

How about
Instead of being sealed off from each other
We realise that it shouldn’t be us vs them
But us vs us –
A moment of introspection
A brutally honest intervention
To give ourselves time to realise
That mindfulness is an exercise
All of us should engage in.

It is easy to exist
Within the frameworks that are provided to us;
The ‘us vs them’ mentality
Is like sandpaper to one’s individuality.
We trim and edit our personality
To fit our group’s motifs.
It is much more difficult
To realise that nobody is going to fight for us
Except for ourselves
And that this fight
Needs to start from within.
All we need to do
Is learn how to say ‘No,
I will not be a part of this –
I will not be a serf to the kings and queens
Who blind your eyes, and steal your dreams.’
WAKE UP.
Saint Audrey Mar 2018
The world always seems to leave me speechless
I don't understand, the things that you needed
Can we trust what they're showing on TV
If reality's a lie

So drag me back to the classics, I think
I need something for this ache
So take me back to yesterday
Today's one day too late

When I don't trust the words of the ones that hold me close
Its getting close enough to be a threat, I think

The air you expel leaves me so **** breathless
With all of this time, I expected advances
So tear down with disregard
There is nothing for me to hide

I wish I could read in a mix of context
Believe you me, this isn't a contest
Tear down this disregard
I've been running short on time

You keep running once you hit the ground
I'm barely here, but you keep screaming at me
Or at least, what used to be
You're late to the party being burnt down in your name

I'm leaving footsteps in the ashes
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