Tender curiosity
ignited something I never anticipated.

Your mind is a mass of knotted rope that I want to untangle with my tongue while our bodies are pressed against each other,
Yet I crave to hold you and know you in the most innocent of ways.

No, I will never be in love with you,
And dear Lord! I hope you never fall in love with me,
but I long to understand you in a way that no one ever has,
and reassure you that your trust goes unbroken.

Follow me tonight,
to the corner where lust and purity meet.

Strong and silent friend,
I have always seen such beauty in you.
Please, never forget that I am on your side.

thinking of times
when walking for a mile
took you into a different world
climbing a hill
    through clinging underbrush
filled you with apprehension
of what might be awaiting you
beyond the crest

then
to slowly open up
the pages of a book
was always more
than just a ritual of escape

the not so casual touch
    of a girl’s hard breast
    a boy’s lean hand
upon your shoulder
sent shudders down your spine
of inarticulate hot expectations
and brought wild images to you
at night
in lusting isolation

to keep this core
   the sense of awe
   of wonder and excitement
alive in you against the waves of many years
is not an easy feat
   yet worth the while

it makes you see
    when many just walk by
life’s gracious beauty of small moments

                        * * * *

Tell me about your dreams
of you
wondering in starlit dew
Tell about each dreamy breath you take
making love for lover's sake
Whisper in my ear my dear
of magical dreams with you
falling into clouds of love
feeling the warmth of you

Tell me about ancient fable times;
Oracle's love questions in rhymes;
rhyming about you and me; beyond an ever calming sea

Tell me about vines that creep
up walls too steep that carry me to you
into bedroom dreams of bliss

Tell me about your dreamy house;
it's lilac door, it's French domain, and flowery window paine
Tell me you dream of two, just me and you
within its walls of love, two like dreamy turtle doves
dreaming of only love...

Those very alluring eyes,
that sparkles even in sunlight
Those curly and shiny hair,
that i wish to run my fingers through
You're very handsome face,
that I can take to look at every seconds left in my life
I never believe then in love-at-first-sight,
But at the very moment I laid my eyes on you,
I started imagining my life with you
Seeing you for the first time,
Is the best 5 minutes of my life
I believe that we are destined to see each other again.


.

We met at friends house  .  .  .
That night was first love making,                                                        
  .  .  .  The moon dance of eyes.

I said, "God, I love you".
She smiled and said I'd do in a pinch.

I said, "but I need you to do something for me..."
She looked into my eyes and said, "What's that"?

I said, "I need you to tell me something".
She said, "All right.  What's that?"

I said, "repeat after me"
I said, " 'wes...' "

She stared back into my eyes and said, "wes..."
She laughed a little chuckle in her throat.

I said, "no, this is serious..."
I looked into her eyes.
I prompted her:  " 'wes...' "

She smiled, saying "wes..."
I said, " 'stop ******' around' "

She said, "stop ******' around"
she laughed again, adding, "wes".

I smiled and said, "no, try it seriously  now"
She said, "wes.  seriously.  stop ******* around..."

She laughed.
I said, "want to go back to bed and fool around?"
She laughed.
I laughed.
We went back to bed.

H,

I think we’re at war right now.
I’m not really sure —
we never were too good at clear conversation —
but I think we’re at war.

And it’s not that I want to do this,
but I’ve sent out the first wave of attacks.

They should arrive tonight, around 11.

I’m sorry.

You just love too much.
I can’t sleep,
I can’t think,
I can’t do my job;
I had to do something.

Please don’t think I wanted this.
Please.

I know you don’t mean to do it.

But I need this.
He needs this.
And after all,
that’s what we both want right?
For him to be happy?

It’s the only way.

And who knows,
maybe you’ll win this one.
You always were a fighter.

Maybe this letter will reach you before they do.
Maybe you’ll come out on top.
And if you do, just promise me one thing.

Take care of him.
Make sure he doesn’t do anything I wouldn’t do.

Try not to break him, the way she breaks you.

With love,
B.

I've been practicing lucid dreaming for a while now, and I think I've almost got it down.

(If you didn't know, lucid dreaming is kind of like dreaming, but with the lights on. It's very cool.)

The way it works -- or at least, in the method I'm using -- is by first establishing a "totem." I use the jade elephant you gave me for my birthday three days before it happened.

What you do is you alter your totem in a unique way so that it really stands out to you, incase you ever come across it in your dreams; this way hopefully it will jump-shock your mind into consciousness, allowing you to take the wheel.

I wrote your initials on the back. DN.

And I know you'd probably be thinking "why would you ever waste time perfecting a skill that will never have any practical use?"

You always were the practical one. But hear me out.

When I dream, it is the only time I get to see you.

You know, you've been gone for almost a year this Tuesday, and this jade elephant is all I have left. This jade elephant, and your initials. This Jade elephant, and DN.

I miss you, man.

And I don't really know how comas work, but if you can hear me, just know that I've almost got it down.

Soon, it'll be just like the old days.
I promise.

She's like the first thirty minutes
After a nice massage.
Tranquil.
Reassuring.
The kind of girl
Who loves to cross my mind
Just as much as she hates to look both ways.

And most days,
She wears a smile miles wide.
But that is only most days.

Some days,
She puts on her thick glassy frames
Not so that she can see more of the world,
But so that the world can see less of her.

Some days,
She would rather leave
Her mental house party
For a walk
Down her hometown avenue,
Letting the streetlights
Carve a new way home.

Those are my favorite days.
And those are the days
That matter the most.
Because those are the days
When she calls me.

Sometimes I wonder
What my life would be like
If I had never met you.

Not in a spiteful way,
Just out of curiosity.
Would a new name replace
The space
You've reserved between my lips? Or would I still be out there,
Counting time
Between the ticks of my metal detector?

Do you remember the metal detector?

You know,
I always was a treasure hunter.

I don't think I ever told you this but,
Before we met,
I modified it a bit.
I was tired of lugging it around,
So I put it in my heart.
This way,
I had nothing weighing me down.
I used that ****** thing for years.

After a while, though,
I got tired of metal.
I only ever found scraps, anyway.
So I modified it a bit more.  
Honestly,
I barely made it out of that one intact,
But it was worth it.
This time, I was looking for love.

I don't want to run this tangent
Into the ground,
But I guess what I really want to know is

Would my heart ever beat that fast again?