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Amanda Kay Burke Nov 2020
I wish I was less selfish

Would that not be great?

To speak kindly to you more a few days a week at least

If I knew the way
I would try

We could have better

This heart yearns for peace

But it is stuck in dysfunction
It doesnt quite work right
Traveler Nov 2020
Anger is a scary thing
Imagine being angry for year
Never knowing it was caused
from being insecure.

You were
easily enraged
Your daddy was drunk
Your mommy was late
an unfulfilled childhood
was your adolescence fate

Now that part of you
is still raw
And now you’re angry at us all!

But I still love you!
P.S
I wish I could’ve raised you with mine!
Traveler Tim

My two sons are very happy as adults!
Keiya Tasire Oct 2020
It was a fear from long ago.
A corner stone of a foundation, dysfunctional.

How you served me and kept me safe
All those growing years.
Thank you for your service.
Thank you for your protection.

Today, with heart and mind
United with intent
I rubbed my hands together
Allowing your energy to grow
And grow and grow
Until it circles between my hands
large and full.

Then with the breath in
Holding on to the stillness.
I see the change.
Ask in prayer. Then give the command.

Breathing out and letting you go with gratitude
As I lifted my hands open to the heavens
My fear floated up toward the Light.
Forever shifted. For ever changed. Forever Transformed.
What happens to us keeps us safe, helps us to grow in awareness and opens our hearts to understanding and transformation. Gratitude releases and opens the heart to love agian.
preston Oct 2020

"What,  you just love me
and then move on..
is that what you do?"

They weren't steps away from her
they were paces

and in an instant, the arrow flew

There is a seam,  
if you are able to see
as there are terracotta dreams
from which

we were  all  meant to be freed

Broken shards  fell to the ground
and inside of every single piece

     is all of the 'hers'
     she thinks that  she needs to be

Not sure if it is the aim
or  the flight  of the arrow
that brings about the aloneness
of an unspeakable,  heart sorrow
and these.. the sufferings of hell.

     Chloe is not dead--
     because  left standing
     when all else fell
     is her spirit's core,  now glowing;

     ..no longer hidden  
     within the confines
     of her terracotta shell.


Ah, beautiful Chloe
baby, there were times..

                remember knowing?
      The water-well;
      ..its  never-ending flowing.

      Believe again in that, my beautiful

              not  the shell.
--Anything is better than this hatred.

         I'm looking forward  to
         an eternity, spent in hell.


it's a broken kinda feeling..
https://youtu.be/FyBJoFz_QPw

xo
youtu.be/HtVOHFL2_KE
Melenie Sep 2020
You call me selfish,
ungrateful and mean.
Are you looking at me?
Do you see me?
or do you see a reflection of you?
I am not perfect
nor do I care to be.
You, who want me to bend and give
to accommodate you
are the selfish one.
Manipulation at its best
and it used to work on me
mold
mold myself
to what he or she wants
make them happy
don't upset anyone.
See me, choose me, don't leave me.
I am not that naive anymore
I am on to you
I see the lies.
Say it again,
and look in the mirror
Selfish, do you see it in your eyes
ungrateful, do you see it in your eyes
mean, do you see it in your eyes
Your name-calling  is a reflection of you
not me
I do not own your perspective.
I will survive it all.
Michael A Duff Jun 2020
She was a beacon my soul was attuned to before I ever knew what a soul was.

She met me like a lioness circling its meal

She crashed over my life and my heart like a ship forced onto rocks by the storm

We mingled intertwined like plants from the same root marking ourselves permanently for eachother

She took a turn dined on dysfunction and tragedy in seven course form never looking up to see the sun

She tossed my soul my love out her window undone used up

She fooled me as many before used for only a time until she could wade back into the comfort of her own past dysfunction like warm water to her mind it was home
The greatest love followed by the greatest heartbreak still scars fresh in my mind down to my deepest parts. She broke me, tamed me and knew that she was unique to me in all the world, but to her I was a mere boy for the taking to be used for her mise until she felt through. Then blamed me for her lifes misery and walked into her darkness that fell like rain with her umbrella.
Michael A Duff Jun 2020
Her gaze touched my soul

I saw beyond all futures

A life of torment
Although she was one person that touched my soul deeper than any other, she was addicted to demons from her past. She seeked the chaos of dysfunction and ever changing ups and downs, it was warm water for her mind and the abused little girl she couldn't grow apart from.
Michael A Duff Apr 2020
She was a match , My other half

She was also poison , The kind you cant get enough of

Her dysfunction mingled with mine in strange ways that broke us both
Matched and missed dearly
Keiya Tasire Jan 2020
Have you heard the saying
The strong can afford to be gentle
While the weak and unsure brag and boast?

The weak are the loudest!  
With overbearing, feigned affection and denial.
Speaking half truths to cast illusions
To veil their target's truth, as lies.

The weak love to gather an army,
of "everyone," so they say.
Why? It is simple!
To siphon your power away.
Yes, they are the "Wolves in sheep's clothing"
Climbing to the top of a mountain of victims
With their claws -n- fangs
Of gaslighting manipulations.

Half -truths and lies,
Guilt -n- shame,
Setting up circumstances,
Playing upon weakness, and social taboos.
Creating false scenarios for others to see
Gossiping and acting
All tools of their game.

Are you scorned,
Offended and hurt?
Never ever worry.
Never let it get to you!
Know, it is all for show.
This is how they magnify their victim role.
But who calls a ravenous wolf a victim,
Knowing the wolf's actions are aimed at control?!!

The wolves are very sly!
Summoning their hatchet men
to do their bidding!
To cut down the innocent,
The sincere, and pure of heart.
Stealing their virtues
Misrepresenting intent.
Are you a part of this cancerous
skurge up on the earth?!

Are you part of their inner circle?
Are you favoured and showered with gifts?
That job you always wanted?
The power, position, and money
That Screams,
"I AM RICH !!!!" I AM POWERFUL!!!
"I HAVE ARRIVED!!!"

How many people did you destroy?
How many hearts did you break?
How many times did you sale your soul?
To be showered with those gifts,
That power, and that position?

Ease your guilt if you wish.
Send a card for every follower's birthday,
Stroke their ego with a wonderful mention,
A salute, to toast both your egos!
As long as you have something to offer
You will be savoured and milked, and stroked
Like aphids in an anthill forever trapped.

Why all this effort to send their targets over the edge?
To keep alive?
To avoid the inevitable overshadowing doom?
What happened to the wolf that used to be free?

Little by little, the wolf was lead astray.
With a gentle ring in its nose
Down into the valley
Where they fear their personal evil.
Each time you did their bidding
Your nose became tighter
And your slavery more sure.

One day, it will be your turn
You will be the "One"
Their sacrificial lamb.
Be alert. Be alive. Beware.
Of their sly well placed apologies and feigned love.  
Pushing you away
Then pulling you in very close.  
Twisting and turning your truth
To suit themselves.
To suit their captain, their very own Kingpin.

Alienation, keeping you alone?
How about in shame?
Is it misleading, even your own emotions?
Your own beliefs, and acts?
Standing on your back,
They will turn you Over and over again.
Until you, their very own scapegoat, collapse.
Whether of exhaustion, mental collapse, or suicide
It doesn't matter.
So long as you dutifully do it
Moving them further ahead.

Do you realize that there is a different choice?
You can insist on holding your integrity!
Refuse to hurt another!
You can refuse to be afraid!
You can refuse to self blame,
You can choose to stands up
and walk away from the game!  

But, once as a wolf in sheep's clothing
You become blood stained
Their hooks will be deep into your soul!
Anchored so strongly by fear.

******* in the hooking and anchoring
Fear propels you on to
Denying reality,  
Denying truth
Denying even evil your own evil actions
Along the path of 8 deadly sins.
Weaving am ever thicker, forever holding web of lies.

What if you curb your hunger for the bait they set?
Denying pride, anger, gluttony,
Letting go of greed, lust, envy,
Idolatry, and sloth.
What if you take courage to make life right?
Becoming untwisted and detangled from the games?  
For love is what matters to the strong
Not power, nor greed, nor money, nor fame.

The wolves may grasp and manoeuvring for more power.
With increased desperation, 
The wolves cloaks begins to slip.
Alast, the sleeping sheep eyes are awakened
And they are asleep no more.

Do you suspect you are dealing with a wolf in sheep's clothing?
Watch their feet and watch their mask.
Test them.
Give them  a bit of their sought after desire.
Then watch closely  
Do they dawn a slight smile when they ask for control?
Do they do it again when you give a little to them?  

Watch! You will see a slight smirk,
A slight gloat, dance across their face.
It will be only for an instant.
They will not thank you.
Acting entitled, they will proceed to take control
Without a thought of you
As they climb upon your back, to stand up!
Thinking that they have scored
And wheeled their power to manipulate and control.

If you see this, there is no doubt.
Trust your instincts, your gut!
Never allow their words to dis-sway you
from your voice of truth!

Is there a wolf under your daughter's, your mother's, your sister's, Your brother's, your aunt's, your uncle's, your cousin's
And/or closest friend's sheepish cloak?
You know the one!
The one who seems to pick a fight
That comes out of  nowhere,
Without a rhyme nor reason.

Know that you never have to engage them
Or prove yourself.
You never give up who you are.
Never give up on your dreams!
Hold on to your true self!
Speak your truth.
If it is trampled by swine
Go to where it will be cherished instead.

Love, prayer, boundaries,
Living within the higher vibrations.
I gave my own wolves' in sheeps' clothing
Their own universe to do whatever they will.
It was the kindest thing I could do for all of us.

I kindly invite them back
If and only if they leave the games behind!!
And live sincerely, with compassion, and respect.
If I see they have stopped climbing on other's backs
I'd lovingly accept them back into  my world.

Yet, it is interesting
How deep my peace has become.
Oh, such peace!!!
How could I ask for more?
Some of us have our greatest challenges within our own families. I have always felt different and apart from my family. Innately my mould seemed different. As I crawled out of the pattern of family games, manipulations, power plays, and control of others for greed, power, and to show prowess as a teenager, I realized that may goals were different. I believed in a kinder, gentler, existence. It made me a truth seeker, in search of increased knowledge, peace, and love.  I don't regret that I have sprung from these roots. I feel I choose my family before birth. They have tested me, and I choose something different for myself. Patterning more after my father's love of truth, respect, and honoring others. These lessons have made me who I am today. I lost nothing, but the relationships that seek harm, to overpower. I am just not interested in these games and chose long ago to step out of them. If they desire to be in my world. I am open to real love, without games.
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