I miss someone I don’t even know.

And as the leaves fall,
I find out I’m youngest no more,
Someone special has taken my role.
I wait for them to bring you home,
your name is all that I know.

I miss someone I don’t even know.

And as I cut my hair short,
I wonder if yours has grown,
if the baby voice has drifted,
soft and unknown,
if your eyes still beg to play
and if your toys still watch you sway.

I miss someone I don’t even know.

And before your first words had formed,
your name was the only thing I could hold,
one street and some harsh words
made us live in two separate worlds.

I miss someone I don’t even know.

I prepare the last gift I can give,
a piece of me to leave a trace.
I know I’ve been naive,
to dream my love could find its place.
Yet I hope one day you’ll know my face,
and see in it a quiet embrace.

I miss someone I don’t even know.

Now I can only wonder,
how much your small hand has grown,
(how long until they tell you I have a headstone)
how many years have passed
(please, forget me fast).

I miss someone I don’t even know.

If one day you reach for me,
remembering someone you barely know,
the little one has turned eighteen,
as small hands have grown,
and your voice became your own.
We will tell the tales untold,
and for the first time,
your brother will be here,
holding the space you leave for me.

And as I await that call,
I’ll remain quiet and cold,
aching for the bond never formed.
Until then,
I will miss you,
my unknown dear.

you look just like her
your body, your face, your hair.
you look most like her
when you’re defiant,
an attitude that rivals her.
you’re stubborn and you’re wrong
but father forgot to mention
that i look just like her.
my body, my face, my hair.
i look most like her
when i’m yelling my face red,
an anger that rivals hers.
i’m tenacious and confident,
i have faith in myself.
yes, father forgot to mention
that i wear my mother well.

I am unknown, still alone.
Experiencing on my own.

No witnesses to validate
My involvement or the weight
Of the choices i've made
Trying to liberate my spirits
With my patterned habits
Only to understand
That i am digging my end
With my crooked tangled hands

But still

My fears and
feelings they tend to vary
And my mind keep changing its mind.

So now i just smile and carry on
Leaving all my worries behind

No one likes to deal with the the unknown
Someone must be manifesting
Because i can't explain my preferences
Disowned , unresting
I have to believe an omniscent is guiding me
So i can truly rest in peace
I don't believe in responsibilities.

Writing is the only way to fruit this fear.

Words Of Harfouchism