i dread the day you learn for the first time that you can't just love all the darkness in me away
and no matter how much you care i will still toss and turn at night and scars might still appear on my skin
i dread the day you realize that you can't cure me and sometimes all you can do is stand next to me and hold my hand through fog pouring out of my ears so black and thick we can't even see each other's faces
i dread the days i can't get out of bed the days you want to take me out and all i can manage is a prettified shell of myself
i dread the day you learn that sometimes no matter how hard i try i still can't pull myself together
the day you learn that there isn't an answer you can give that will save me from my fears
you aren't the first person who has tried to love the darkness inside away my family and friends have given it their all but someday you too will learn that if love could cure mental illness the world would be a much better place
This line struck me to the core My beliefs are starting to crumble Doubt rises inside my head
"This is unfair! Why I feel wronged when I fall in love with her?!"
A question that burst inside my heart Frustration, pain, anger and weakness goes with it A typhoon that destroys everything in its path
"Then why invest when it's already a losing fight?"
I was lost, my voice doesn't seem to go out Why did I love a person who in the first place does not love me back? For once I truly loved a person who drag me in despair A lesson that needs to be ingrain in my heart
He woke up from his trance while silently looking at the foreign place he is in. He does no know what he is doing there but he remember how she left him when they are still happily having their date on the other day. He felt being hopeless in the dark when she is gone.
He ask to God why? He feels that he is cheated He is angry! He hates her! He hates her! He really hates her!
"Can you prove that she does not love you even if she left you in the dust?"
He stared at the person asking the question. He thought it is a foolish question Is leaving him behind not an solid proof that she does not love me? He is dumbstruck The question that he don't know what to feel.
"Betrayal can also mean that you are love by her you know? Do you now understand?"
And at that moment he remembered that he is in the classroom listening to his professor.
At that single moment, I hug her for a very long time Devoid of reasoning Just a sincere raw feeling Of how much I miss her. Never minding the busy streets, The amuse stares of the the crowd, Or the noisy cheers of our friends. It's just between us, beating as one.
When I met my long time sweetheart for almost 2 years due to my studies in a boarding school