This is the fourth Mother's Day that has come around since you died.
When you perished, I had to deal with a lot of pain on the inside.
When you became ill, I wanted you to get well and so did my brother.
I found out just how painful it is when a person loses his or her mother.

You are gone but I still have fond memories of you.
You were terrific and other people knew that you were amazing too.
You were a very special mother and I'll always be proud to give you praise.
You still exist in my eyes because I'll carry you in my heart for the rest of my days.

As long as there are waves in the oceans
As long as there are skyscrapers in New York
As long as there is a moon and a sun
As long as there is a breakfast, lunch, and dinner
As long as there are seven continents
As long as there are hearts, lungs, and bones in our bodies
As long as there is love in my heart, I will always love you

Labour clenses
I sweat pure evil.
Lifting freight, peddling souls

No thank you
Im not climbing the ranks.
But slowly i begin to grin


I know where i fit
Assosciated with happiness.
Only known by doubt


Through labour i lift my plight

Flip flip slide slide
grind grind pop pop
concentration.

hours and hours
sweat pours
bruised ankles bruised kneecaps
scraped shinbones scraped elbows
scabs and scars.

shirts and jeans torn, worn;
shoes a tattered mess--
laces shredded to bits tied desperately
clinging on to lapping tongues.

hair matted to skull sweating within damp skullcaps,
whether be it helmets (by choice or restriction),
or fitted baseball hats turned backwards,
or cuffed beanies in the dead of winter.
(father says the latter choices work well to soak all the blood up, I always roll my eyes in naivete.)

The paved driveway, where on my eighth birthday
a shining basketball goal sat at its full height
towering in the mountain sky--

stood forlorn in place as wide eyes glued to the pavement--

where shoes stood atop the gritty surface of a wooden board
with wheels attached to gleaming metal axles
rolled smoothly excitedly across the pavement in perpetuity.

destiny.

I was devastated when I learned that you wouldn't make it.
When it came  to my heart, your demise sure did break it.
You died 1096 days ago in 2013.
It was the worst year that I've seen.
When I saw you on life support, it was rough but facing your death was rougher.
My brother and I had you taken off the respirator so you wouldn't continue to suffer.
When you were dying, I felt helpless because there was nothing I could do.
When I found you dead on March the 6th, I had to say goodbye to you.
It took me about two years to get to feeling better about your death.
For two years I suffered tremendously after you became ill and left.
You were such a great mother that you made my brother and I better men.
Your death isn't permanent, when Jesus returns, we will see each other again.
I felt overbearing pain which made my life a mess.
Rest In Peace Mom, you were truly the greatest.

You weren't a saint but you were extremely close.
Out of all of the people on Earth, I've always loved you the most.
It will be very painful as they lower you into the ground.
Life will never be the same because you're no longer around.

You were a wonderful Human Being and a terrific mother too.
Your family and friends will always love you.
You were so sweet and kind that you should've been given a humanitarian award.
The people in Heaven are happy because you're there and so is The Lord.

You're in a better place and that makes your friends and family glad.
But as people see the tears rolling down my cheeks, they know that I'm so sad.
You were one fantastic lady, you were truly one of a kind.
Knowing that Heaven is your new home gives us peace of mind.

From time to time I wasn't the ideal son and that's something I regret.
You gave me life, love and happiness and that's something I'll never forget.
It hurts very much because you are deceased.
Everybody loves you Mom, may you Rest In Peace.