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lola Dec 2024
I am not living,
merely alive.
I lie in bed each day, waiting for my life to start.
As if I'm playing a game,
watching the loading screen,
yet never pressing play.
I am not playing,
merely watching,
as people complete tasks,
upgrade,
level up.
I watch and wait to press play.
What am I waiting for?
homeschooled on and off my whole life, i have one friend. i could make more. i could go to school. what is stopping me from starting my life?
duck Dec 2024
oh my, a white flower.
pale as snow and oh so pure
that the devils cower
is it a cure?
distaste in my mouth
how can something be so innocent
when my whole life is going south
not a sliver of thing decent
I didn't flinch
as I crush the flower with my foot
maybe I'm a Grinch
pessimistic to the root
felt its petals grinding
turning into powder
consumed by a rage so blinding
that makes me wonder
what have I become
...?
DJQuill Nov 2024
Who am I to you?
Am I the song you play to feel happy?
Or am I the playlist
where you put all your favorite songs together
and listen to them on repeat?
Hello Daisies Nov 2024
My biggest dream
When I was little
Surrounded by those so brittle
Was relationships
Love
Everything in between
And above

Now that I'm older
I found them
I've had my heart stolen
I've seen stars above
And wonders around
Til I ended up on the ground
Heart broken

Then again
Evermore
I found a dream love
Rough at first
Hard to tame
Now we're changing
Our last names
Soft and plush
Endless lush

Now what?
What do I do
What do I be
Am I happy?
Who is me?
I spent years alone
Some ok
Most with stones
I thought I knew
Me
I thought I knew
Destiny

Am I God's child
Am I young and wild
Am I caged and broken
Sickly and bedridden
What's my purpose
What's my goal
Will I ever know

Is having fun enough
Is being in love enough
Why do I feel so rough
Am I a mother in waiting
A loner always hating
A musician and poet
Lost at sea before you know it

I'm coasting
The shoreline of life
Ive lived some
But who do I become
Years stolen
Now constantly
Unknown
Fun and comfort
Fighting for health
Is this my wealth?

I think everyone feels empty
Or mostly.
I feel ghostly
Barren and cold
Dead to any life shown
Emotional and overblown
If this is normal
That's devastating
I want a goal
I want to know
Is God real
What is it that I feel
Am I failing God
Am I failing me
What's destiny

I'm bored
I'm empty
Like once before
A child wishing for plenty
She still hasn't gone
I'm terrified
This is where she stays
And forever belongs

A constant sad song


I have so much to love
Yet so much to grief
I want a reprieve
I want a happy tune
A beautiful moon
A snowy night
No more goodbyes
I want to know myself
And my life
I want to own it
I want to know God
And all there is

I want to find bliss
No more emptiness
That child is scared
Every night
Every day
It's hard to breathe

Someone
Or rather myself
Please show me
Show her
The way
What to do
Everyday
Sometimes my life feels meaningless and empty. .
Silence Screamz Nov 2024
Words are just carbon duplicates
of intertwined shapes to insinuate a specific instruction

Trying to make sense of it all, intricate complications seem to follow the very next sound

Wrapped in their secular meaning and internal definitions, we don't know the true pieces inside them

Does it mean light, dark, weird, crazy, confused, red, green, or gold?

Left, right, or upside down, who knows.
Its a guessing game of sorts. What do you see? Is it the same as me?

Linguistics interrupting unusual interceptions of crossing patterns within mixed mediums

See Jack Run, Red Fish, Blue Fish or 1,2,3
What does this all mean? Is it all free?

Signs of simple or insane complexities
surrounding mental restraints.
Turning the page, what do we see next?

Oh ok, now I get it !! Letters of different languages placed within the confines of a verbal, visual, or audible prison

"Call me Ishmael"
Platinum Oct 2024
Ouch, A pinch brought me out of where I was
Where was I, who was I, i suddenly felt the urge to sigh
Ooooff, it was my birthday, I was turning 18, another rating, said my friends who were also anticipating
Was I alright?, Miss Chad looked at me in fright

I don't know, Just started looking at classic **** a little to deep
I suddenly knew what to throw away and what to keep
Some birthday gifts just weirdly started spelling the word "creep"
Am I but another lost person or lost sheep

Nauseous, I thought I was sick
I turned on the TV and started calling Rick and Morty, Morty and Rick
It amounted to no time that my homies started seeing signs of the ick
From chilling with the mandem to playing the ladies's pick a *****

Now I'm at a refute to leave
I'm no longer able to play "lots to take, less to give"
Wait, I now have my own taxes and bills
The money I have at my disposal, gives me the chills

Hold on, wait, is this truly maturity
This isn't what my friends told me I should be expecting
Well, it's happened, and at least, I know it can be handled
***** maturity, ***** grown-ups, alas, they are still boats you have to paddle!!!!!
Gerhard Oct 2024
Eyes burning
Head spinning
Palms dry

What is happening?
What am i doing?

Will it be worth it in the end?

Will i remember these filler-days as much as the valuable ones?

True is a moment of the false
False?

Head spinning
Eyes burning
Palms dry

Have i done this to myself?

A victim of my own devices standing stoically blue.
Ivy Chakma Oct 2024
I look at my parents and find them so simple hearted,
Yearning for nothing more; but significance.
Time slows down in their company and heart takes the lead.
I find myself confused in emotions of pity and regret for I know there is only this much time I have with them and there is so much more I want to do with them.
apricot Sep 2024
In the depths of my soul lies a hollow
A void that echoes with endless sorrow
A deep ache that no one can follow
A pain so raw, it's hard to swallow

I try to fill it with fleeting pleasures
But they only serve as temporary measures
The emptiness remains, a constant tether
Dragging me down, no end in sight, forever

I search for meaning, for some reprieve
But all I find is grief upon grief
I long for solace, a moment of peace
To bring an end to this endless disease

So I wander alone in this empty space
Hoping to find a way to embrace
The hollow that haunts me
Jeremy Betts Sep 2024
I must let go
Or I'll lose you
But if I do that
I'll lose myself too
...I don't know what to do...

©2024
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