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Nicole Aug 2022
It feels so wrong to think of you
But even after all these years
We're still dancing in my dreams
I dont think I ever told you
But from that time I emailed you
I still thought we were meant to be
Writing usually feels easy
But with this I am terrified
I'm afraid you'll think I'm crazy
I don't want to bring you pain
I don't want to be so selfish
But these memories can drive me mad
I read something you wrote before
From that last time we hungout
When you thought I didn't care
I was distant because I was scared
It'd been years and I still loved you
I hurt you, and I loved you
I never told you it back then
Because I felt I'd hurt you more
I'd done enough, without making it worse
I know it's a silly thing
Since we don't know each other now
But I want to
Back then I thought our story wasn't over
That we'd connect again once we were older
But now I live across the country
And I'm too afraid to say hello
Bardo Aug 2022
Feelings are funny things
I used think feelings were the sweet feelings you felt when you were very young
When you were little
(Before the emptiness came)
These were what feelings were... to me.

So it used to baffle me when I got older
After I'd gone through some traumas of my own in life
And suddenly I found much to my dismay
That I no longer felt anything inside myself anymore
Only an emptiness, a numbness, a nothingness... a void
Those lovely early feelings had now all gone
I knew...I knew there was something wrong

But then I'd hear some people say
"Oh, I feel this way or I feel that way... I feel happy, I feel sad, I feel...
And I'd think to myself What! you still feel something inside yourself
Y'know Me! I don't feel anything anymore
All my old feelings that made me who I was they've  all gone
And I have no idea how to get them back again.

But then I'd think
Y'know when you say you feel...say you feel lonely or depressed or calm and confident
Overwhelmed or in control... whatever!
all these different emotions/ so called feelings
But these aren't.... these aren't the real feelings are they
Not like the feelings you had when you were a little child
Their just... aren't they just words describing mental states where/how you find yourself during the day
You feel sad probably because you're thinking sad thoughts
Or you feel happy because you're thinking happy thoughts
But sure I could do that
Yea! I could say well I feel... I feel hungry
Or I feel a bit apprehensive about something that's coming up
Or maybe I feel excited because I'm going out to a show somewhere
But these... these aren't the real feelings are they though
Not the lovely sweet feelings you had as a little child
No! Their not the same.

Y'know when a child comes into the world they start as a clean slate
They have no words at all to begin with
Yet even then they have these incredible sweet feelings inside that make them feel so happy and so special
It makes them feel like they own the whole world
Maybe... maybe their a symptom of the Divine. I...I don't know.

And I'd say this to someone sometimes and it's like they'd look at me kind of strangely
As if to say "What do you mean... when you say... the real feelings!
It's hard to write something about the aloneness from whence you come, trying to articulate your own experience, something that's very subjective. I've written quite a few poems now about the emptiness within and the sweetness long ago. And the Quest to return to that Paradise of old LoL.
Nicole Aug 2022
"What do we do about this?"
You ask with our hands intertwined
I breathe in my fear
Breathe it out calmly
I don't have any answers
I only know how I feel
And if they ask me if I love you
I might just say yes
She Writes Jul 2022
How can I give you what you need
when you have yet to discover it yourself?
Elena Jul 2022
Night is coming to an end
The Sun will rise again
My eyes still wide open
Similar to an owl
Looking out at the sky
Those beautiful colors
Falling on each other
Maybe one day
They will give me freedom
They will give me peace
Daivik Jul 2022
Eighteen
Such a strange age
Want to be free
Afraid to leave the cage

Too young to be old
Too old to be young
Too little to spend
Too much to learn

Afraid of the future
Long to be in it
Flightless birds
in a sky with no limit

Nothing to do
So we cry
Nothing to live for
So we die

Addicted to depression
This covid generation
Craving some attention
Looking for clarity
In this lonely,loveless Eden
Zoo animals thrown into wild
Without any preparation

Hate our parents
Hate the world
Hate ourselves
Issues of dearth

Want to do so much
So we do nothing instead
Feeling so tired
Of being so useless

Yes,we have dreams
Atleast I remember that we do
What are they exactly but
We haven't got a clue

Something in between
First-time adult,last-time child
Most of the times we do nothing
But somedays we wanna be wild

Staring emptily into the void of insta
For that rush of dopamine
Too afraid to be bored
Young,dumb and serene

Simultaneously thinking
We are better and worse than our true selves
In search for salvation
On video game shelves

I'm so confused
This way or the other
Too dumb to know the answer
Too proud to ask my mother

All the friends
have suddenly become so strange
Acting so different
Singing odes to hell

Everyone else,
so figured out
Me and my friends
surrendered to doubt

Life-changing decisions
And dank memes
Not know what we are feeling
Not knowing what we want
Not knowing who are

Since we have so much time
We love to waste it all
Give me a friend to talk to
There's too much going on

Waiting for the revolution
Watching tiktok on the computer
Reading novels on socialism
What is your political compass?

Hearing the same song again and again
Left wing or right wing,which path do we take
Contemplating the economy,measuring the pain
Doing silly trends,to be up with our friends

Gold fish attention span
Choose a poison,choose a clan
We have so many plans but don't ask our plans
Be obnoxiously silent or be obnoxiously loud
Time to get real,time to fool around

Learning about the world
It seems awesome and f-ed up
The adults have ruined it
Now we have to clean up

Confusion is an ally
We are *****,young teens
Oh no,******
Feelings of love begin

Hey god if you are real
Can you email me the address
Because I am unable to find the pincode
of true happiness?

Take us to the yesterday
Take us to the future
What to do,what to do
Killed by confusion
Dont judge,you were once like this too

I don't know what I want to mean
But I get a pass
I'm confused,I'm eighteen

You cannot understand us
Because neither can we
Que sera sera
Whatever will be,will be

(Note-the poem may feel repetitive because so is life)
Amanda Kay Burke Jul 2022
I wonder how you are feeling exactly
If you miss taste of my lips
Say you care but I can't help but worry
To you I am just something broken to fix
Before it seemed like you were so into me but now it just seems like you want me to change before we even give it a try
ManxPoetryGuy Jul 2022
I can't remember,
Remember a time,
A time when the world seemed so clear.

Following the footprints in the sand,
The footprints left by those before me,
Those before me leading me to the future they've built for me.

I am not happy with it,
Happy with the future I'm expected to greet,
Greet with Open arms and claim as if I worked for it myself.

I am not the person I have been lead to be,
Lead to be in the hopes I will end up like you,
Like you to bear the torch of compliance and mediocrity.

With Chissel in hand I will change it,
Change the future and carve the stone anew,
Carve the stone anew and leave my own footprints in the sand.
Holy Moly I ain't posted in a hot minute, like I've said in my older posts I have planned on coming back and creating more, this time I hope to mean it...
My Dear Poet Jul 2022
I’m sorry
if I’m a little lost
when the mind is free
the body follows at a cost
till you’re broke and can’t pay
the soul is stolen away
leaving the shell of a ghost

Forgive me
if I’m a little used
when you’re careless
you casually bruise
till you’ve bled no more
have no life to pour
the spirits withered
and abused

My apology
for being a mess
when what’s of value
becomes little to confess
when what you hold
is worth all the gold
and you give it up
for lentils or less
ardnaxela Jul 2022
?
Am I really
just fighting
for
my family
or
is there more
like
am I all
?
so
fighting for
the feeling
of having someone
to care
for me
**** it
I deserve it
I deserve it.

or
could it be
the fight was
Just
a façade
am I All
ready
?
falling
victim to the fear
of failure
?
am I alright... ?
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