And then one day
You asked me what happened with
All the poems of mine
And I said they're all gone
With those so many reasons
For writing them

They're gone with myself

But I grabbed a sheet and
Wrote down the new ones
Instead of them poems
But something inside of them
Has been rapidly changed
With those so many reasons
For writing them

They've been changed.

I, do not have any regrets
You, really should
This is not a break up poem
This is not a girl power poem
This is not a ******* poem
No
Cause I am still heartbroken
In a way I never expected
You see
Leaving me was not the worse decision you have made
Rather leaving yourself was
Where did
      those sunshine eyes go?
      those rocky dreams and
      smooth smooth words
Now everything that leaves your lips have an edge
Even your touch is no longer soft
The world made you hard
And I am sorry
if our love is at all to blame,
I am sorry but
You can not hide behind regrets
Especially when
There are none there to begin with
Give your mother a hug for me and please
Tell her
that I am sorry
Because we both loved our six foot tall teddy bear two years ago even if
he is still standing right in front of us
He is no longer there
And that loss
That absence
Is the hardest to forget

You left me on a hot summers day,

You said that you had to go away,

And you must be enjoying your stay,

Because I haven't heard from you since that day.

Present day, things have changed,

Summers over now, and  it rains here in every way.

I was a piece of paper, you wrote upon me,
I couldn't read straight away what you'd
inked upon my soul.

You started to fold me from the edges to
the inside. I was formless before,  now you
sculpted my being into a constructed form.

*"A heart sculptured by you,

I replaced you with my dad, yeah that might sound weird but he is one to listen. i talked to you as if you were my therapist but actually it was more than that. I opened up to you. I shared all my darkest thoughts and darkest moments. I know at times you were not a good listener but when i asked, you always would. here I am today, I feel like i've been talking to deaf ears for years. so now i'm just blank, i'm quiet, I just keep things to myself.  I never used to be this way, I was the loudest kid in the room. I was always the nicest too. one thing that hasnt changed is, my pain.  it still remains and it burdens me every step along the way. I ignore it like the hatchet in my side, sometimes it hurts, sometimes i bleed, sometimes i dont notice it. but its there. it hovers me like my own shadow, and it becomes overwhelming to breathe.
I'm a sensitive, passionate person. and my heart leaks when i need to speak. I share my thoughts with my dad, and sometimes it makes him sad. I go on for hours, its the only way to get the heartache out. I have issues, I have problems. but I have a past, and i've stopped running from all of it, I'm open into talking about it. I just wish someone would listen.

In search of search is a search, which once when started was with regards to what else is still there in an uncertain future.

A lot of things changed since then, many new things happened along the way.
The past is left far behind, as of now it’s the present moment in time.

In the present the same search,
if it reaches to a desired conclusion,
then it will enhance the scope of future.

There are moments in life when it’s easy to start with something,
care must be taken that you end up with the same thing, which you had initially started.

There are moments in life when it’s easy to give up,
but then the same thing,
if continued further would have definitely fetched good results is realized and learnt later.

Life is strange
Strange are the ways of life
Life is uncertain
Uncertainties and worries continue to remain as an essential and integral part of life and still it's life.
Life continues with all the complexities involved and included in it.

Make the most of the present moment in time,
opportunities and possibilities are different from each other,
both have the ability to find, define and enhance the scope of future with regards to the present moment in time.

Intentions play a major role in deciding the right line of action,
clean, clear and good intentions yield the desired results rather than having something going on at the back of mind.

Definitely the right thing when it's done at the right point in time gives the desired results.

Shut the hell up
Keep it to yourself
Sister, sister
Thought you could be my dear sister
Hear my heart beating
hands start to shake
Soul starts to bleed
Sister's mister
Why did you kiss her?
Now Changed her for the worse
Now I'm force to help her

When you left
I broke and lost pieces of myself
You still have them
They belong to you now
I will never be the girl I used to be
You hold her in your memories and thats the only place she will ever be
When you come back I wont be the girl you remember
You wont recognize me
Your love changed me
And when you left me it changed me more

Oh, you want to talk?
It's been months now
I almost had forgotten
how you changed me,
                     *back then.