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elizabeth Sep 2016
I miss him;
I wonder if he's thinking about me?
I wonder if he's missing me too?
He says he does, but sometimes
Doubt just creeps into my mind...
It says "He doesn't really love you.";
"He doesn't really want
To be with you.";
"He wouldn't care if you..."
And that's where I must stop.
Because what follows would
Show just how pathetic I am.
I don't want him to see
Me as pathetic and pity me...
He might leave if he sees my true self.
I don't want him to leave.
Please don't leave.
*Don't leave me...
September 6, 2016
These are just a few of my many insecure thoughts these days.
The demons keep getting stronger and I seem to be giving in...
I can still feel his fingers
tap along to the beat,
hand nestled between
where my waist and hip meet;
it’s almost if he is trying
to make music of me.

His touch puts me in tune
and I’m an instrument
but only for his use,
because the way that boy
plays my body
is enough

to leave every inch
of it singing.
The sound of your voice,
inside of my mind

and the way that you laugh,
wide smiled; opened eyed

and your fingers entangling
themselves between mine

and your strong arms around me
holding me from behind

and the feel of your hair
paired with honest eyes

and the taste of your lips,
touched upon mine

and the rest of my skin always
somewhere to reside

and I’m scared, actually-
I’m ******* petrified

that soon I won’t
be able to remind

myself of how you look
sound asleep, by my side

and that maybe over time
we might forget everything

about one another,
all together.
Never in my life
has a boy kissed me like that.

Your hands trailed my body
so delicately, showing care

almost like I was a flower;
my parts petals

you were scared would wilt
if you pressed them too hard

and in that moment,
I realised-

that’s the only way
I wanted to be kissed again.
hadley Sep 2016
bottle me up or swallow me whole
i'll take what i can get
absolute destruction by your hand
could only feel as sweet
as the moment my eyes meet yours
put your lips on mine
don't stop until the night is fleeting into sparks of daylight
and us
awoken from this daydream
and i
never want to question
that for one ethereal moment

you were mine.
We move in correlation
a human constellation
you are my infatuation
i shine at your affection
but in watery reflection
you're unsteady, an evasion
i reach out for your attention
receiving only your impatience,
my sun, whats your obsession
with comets in far directions
am i not your one exception,
your moon, your connection?
but i move past your perception
fade with stars and imperfection
i ask you only one small question
was ours love, or a reaction?
Em Sep 2016
He reminded me of you. I remember his taste, it was just like yours: a perfect mix of hopelessness and pain. His careless demeanor matched yours to a t. His excuses and yours aligned perfectly. The sound of him sleeping mimicked you. I think the only difference between the two was, it wasn't just *** for him. I wasn't just a prize to be won. I wasn't a toy sitting there waiting to be claimed. He saw me as a person, or at least he made it seem like he did. If it was all an act, at least he was a better actor. I deserved better than either of you were willing to give me. He didn't rush me like you did. He at least took the time to spread out the lies, to make them believable. He reminded me of you, and that's just one more example of how I can never escape you.
Both of you had me wrapped around your finger. I would have done anything for either of you. I gave up so much for the both of you and neither of you cared. I still wasn't worth it. Will I ever be?

Written 8.31.16
You're going to love someone with everything you have one day.
You are going to love so hard that it almost kills you.
It's going to feel like you're dying.
And maybe you are.
Maybe thats what love is
Maybe love is taking every single inch out of yourself until you are left
with nothing just so that the person you love is okay.
Maybe we take all of our warmth and put it into someone else
until we are left frozen and alone.
But maybe that isn't love.
maybe love is putting warmth into each other so no one is left in the cold.
Maybe I've been doing it wrong this whole ******* time and its time
to ******* be warm again.
He is all lines and sharp angles
I am soft curves and extra padding
But it doesn't matter so much
When he's holding my hand
Intertwined and all jumbled up,
Or when he's kissing me
Closed eyes and only nerves
Igniting
How strange to think the knife
Could learn to love the butter
Concept: 32º heat with friends in the green grass. I am looking at you and you at me, i don't know where we stand anymore. You move from your 10 foot distance to kiss my head and rest yours in my lap. The turbulent sea inside me calms with relief.
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