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Cadmus 2d
I never forgave my twin brother
for abandoning me
for six minutes in our mother’s womb,
leaving me there alone,
terrified in the dark,
floating like an astronaut in that silent space,
while kisses rained down on him from the other side.

Those were the longest six minutes of my life
the minutes that made him the firstborn,
the favored one.

Ever since, I raced to be first:
out of the room,
out of the house,
to school,
to the cinema
even if it meant missing the end of the movie.

Then one day, I got distracted,
and he stepped out to the street before me.
Smiling that gentle smile,
he was struck by a car.

I remember my mother
how she rushed from the house
at the sound of the impact,
how she passed by me,
arms outstretched toward his lifeless body,
but she screamed my name.

To this day,
I’ve never corrected her mistake.

It was I who died,
and he who lived.
Sometimes grief chooses the wrong name. And sometimes, we let it.
Sean Crewson Apr 29
Curling buds,
Growing Moisture,
Fertility hops to.
Eostre watches;
Sprigs peek out,
Leaves spring gently
Into Existence.

Cernunnos
Is invoked, and
Brings life forth.
The old hag
Succumbs to
The horned
Man.

Her
Cold heart
Warms to
A gently
Breeze,
And brings
Blood to
Life.
Those who are born in night,
Fear the sun.
Those who are born in light,
Fear the sin.
Though, I fear them both,
For I was born amongst the twilight.
A mix of two opposites
Meggi Mar 31
There is an old man’s walker beside the baby’s pram on the bus
There is something somewhere that is profound in that
I should think of time and cycles and the round about life
Of cradles and coffins
Of metal holding the body
There is a walker beside a pram on the bus
I think of baby shoes
Of my grandmothers slippers
Of my ******* boots  
Of the round about life
It begins—
not with a shape, nor a line,
but a spark, a whisper, caught in design,
something unseen, not yet thought,
a seed before rising to light.

Fingers trace the unseen design,
pressing the silence, pulling the thread,
molding what stirs, what longs to be said.

The wheel turns, the rhythm wakes,
clay that trembles, bends, and breaks—
too much force, it shatters fast,
too little, and it cannot last.
Again, again, the hands return,
not to command, but to discern.

Then—

the self dissolves.
No hand, no clay,
only motion, only sway,
a pull, a pulse,
something rising from the space
between knowing and embrace.

No thought remains,
only touch, only trance,
only creation’s quiet dance,
shaping itself through the one who bends,
to where the art itself intends.

And when the wheel slows to its rest,
when breath is deep and hands are pressed,
who shapes, who surrenders—
the hands, or what they manifest?
souletry Mar 5
I find myself lacking the ability to find elation
in the parts of my brain that give me satisfaction.
In the parts of the world that are supposed to bring me
whatever the opposite of misery is.
the same way you lack the ability to find brushing your teeth in the morning
anything but tedious.
Because my brain is too big.
Your world is too small, mine consumes all that lives.
As if I was born to vegetate my own existence
and pick the pieces of my brain that hold fascination.
I care less about what you think.
if only I could step out of myself to stop and jot on
my eccentric behavior
the way I express myself even when I eat.
my supernatural way of thinking
and how that coils its way into my connections
with people who are only self-aware when the situation is far from the person
who is mindful of.
Would my analyzation of my core and the outsiders of this world
make me neurodivergent?
Would I be accepted into society because I need therapy?
Would it make me less human if I declined help from another one?
Of course let the person who is qualified on reading others
like a book read me like I'm just page.
Grasp on to the things I can't just understand yet.
Help me understand myself even if you are not me.
It all sounds vague.
let the therapist teach me how to be self-aware and learn a new ability
to not panic as much
the same thing we all care about in the minds of the animals that we eat.
I am not a pig.
I doubt I'm even human at all except the parts of my existence.
I can't even tell you what the world is
but I can definitely tell you what comes from it
and how it rebirthed me.
this may be my best piece lol
here it is warm
but the company
colder than
white
trying
subtly
to differentiate
from one
or the other

a blip
on intuition
wasted
and desperate

she reaches
deep
into her womb
grabbing
squeezing
spongy tissue
aborting all emotion

expelling all
that was lost
the first time
she called
your name

you never heard
her voice
blank
silent
ignorance
did you ever love
her silent words


she allowed
you to push
inside
deep
pleasure
mistaken for love

gliding
thrusting
grunting
moaning

***

contracting
throbb­ing
spurting
dripping
screaming

crying

bleeding
incision
decision
circumcision

birthing
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